The Jerk Who Cried Wolf
by Rainbowkittyblossomwings
Summary: During a sleepover Keroro learns that Mois of all people has a crush on him. Not being able to comprehend this fact at all he insists that Angol Mois is dating Kululu so she can't possibly have feelings for him. This starts up several events as Keroro tries to prove that he's not the biggest idiot on the planet.
1. Shipping Chart

**I had a dream where this fic happened and then I immediately wrote it down in the morning. Originally it was going to be a one-shot but then I realized I could very easily make another kurumois fluff fic out of this.**

* * *

Keroro, Giroro and Dororo lay in Keroro's room staring up at the ceiling in the middle of the night. Not for any important reason, just for a sleepover.

It had been Keroro's idea. "We have to get back to our roots! Our strong childhood friendship. Us three don't do nearly enough activities together."

Giroro would have yelled at him for wanting to do something so childish at the time, but Dororo had been weeping openly at the fact that Keroro had invited him anywhere. _Hmph. Fine. I guess I'll go along with Keroro's dumb sleepover idea. It's just a night and I guess I can space out instead of listening to his stories about himself._ He knew there was something nefarious about this whole idea. Likely Keroro wanted to make fun of him by setting him up to do something stupid or he wanted people to listen and admire him.

It wasn't about childhood nostalgia. It couldn't be.

"Can I come?" Tamama had asked, eyes wide and hopeful.

"No!" Keroro easily rejected. "It's for us childhood friends only. I mean you weren't in our childhood, were you? You weren't part of our little group."

Tamama grinded his teeth and glared. "No. I guess I wasn't." He admitted unhappily, knowing he was being excluded from the sleepover. He brightened up when he saw Mois also looking sad though. Because the one thing that brought him happiness was his rival's misery. If he wasn't going, neither was she! "Well I hope you THREE have fun! With all that childhood nostalgia."

Keroro gave him a thumbs up, while Dororo tried to contain his excitement murmuring to himself every now and then "I'm part of a group! I was remembered! Me!"

Giroro just pat him on the back.

And now he just needed to get through the whole ordeal. As Keroro chattered to Dororo about their childhood exploits and stories, Giroro found himself becoming distracted and focusing instead on the present verses the past.

He doodled in a little notebook that Keroro had made them each bring so they could pass notes like children. He found himself doodling Natsumi's face and hearts after a while.

Eventually he let his mind drift to the chances of how likely it was that he was actually going to end up with Natsumi. He feared it might not be too likely. But he didn't want to tell himself that.

As Keroro talked Giroro started doodling names, wondering how many love rivals he actually had that would get in his way of getting together with Natsumi.

Saburo, Koyuki, he found himself writing names and drawing lines between them and Natsumi.

Other people would get in his way too. Kululu because he was a jerk, Keroro because he was a constant annoyance.

He added them too. And as the night drifted on he found himself doodling more lines between people. He would put arrows when things were one sided. Question marks when he didn't know like with Momoka and Fuyuki.

He realized after a moment that what he was doodling was a relationship chart, trying to figure out where all their weird antics were, and how he really was a small piece in the larger picture.

 _Man. Keroro speaking really does make you space out and draw the weirdest things._ Giroro thought to himself.

Keroro peered over his shoulder, because Giroro was unguarded. "What are you drawing?"

Before Giroro could defend himself Keroro pulled the notebook out from under him. Dororo sat by his side also looking.

"What is this?" Keroro asked again even more confused as he squinted.

"Ah! It must be a friendship chart!" Dororo smiled. "You can see that by the fact that there's a line between Lady Koyuki and I." He beamed.

"It's only got an arrow from you though." Keroro frowned. "Does that mean she doesn't think of you as a friend?"

Dororo's smile fell immediately. He looked at Giroro horrified. "You think that Lady Koyuki doesn't think of me as a friend? Giroro! How could you be so cruel?" He looked closer at Koyuki's name. "She thinks of Natsumi as a friend but not me?" He curled up. "…Lady Koyuki would never forget about me."

Keroro pat him on the back. "Maybe Giroro's the cruel person of this friendship. I mean his chart really is mean. Two people are friends with me and neither of them is Fuyuki and apparently I don't feel any sort of friendship for either of them!" Keroro frowned, pointing at his name and Angol Mois and Tamama's names with arrows pointing to him.

"It's...Uhh a relationship chart." Giroro reluctantly admitted. "Not a friendship chart. But...Perhaps I should have added in the friendships. That's important too." It was important to know who his friends were and Natsumi's. He wanted to know it all.

Dororo perked up. This meant that Koyuki didn't hate him! "Oh! You should have said that to begin with." He paused. "Wait a minute….You think I have a crush on Lady Koyuki?" He frowned at Giroro and crossed his arms. None of that was Giroro's business.

"It was relevant!" Giroro defended. If Koyuki liked Natsumi, and Dororo liked Koyuki it would be easier to separate Natsumi and Koyuki.

Dororo just continued staring at him in disapproval. Dororo's disapproval was harsh.

"Well don't you?" Keroro piped in, trying to help Giroro out a little bit.

"W-what. No. No I don't." Dororo denied. "Lady Koyuki and I are just friends."

Both Giroro and Keroro now stared at him. Dororo started to sweat.

"Uh, Um..." He just kinda stuttered.

Neither Giroro nor Keroro believed his story.

Keroro eventually showed him mercy by focusing on his name. "It does make more sense that this is a relationship chart instead of a friendship chart. I mean I should have known when the only line with Fuyuki was Momoka." He paused. "But what I don't get is if it's a relationship chart what's with the line from Mois to me?" Keroro pointed. "The way you're doing this it makes it look like she likes me or something."

This time Dororo stared at him. Was Keroro seriously that dense? Did he not know? He looked honestly confused.

"What about Tamama's name?" Giroro pointed out. After all he had put Mois and Tamama as both having a crush on Keroro.

Keroro stared at him blankly. "Tamama's name is on this thing?" He looked closer. "Oh! So it is! I wonder who he likes." He was so dense that he didn't even see the line between them.

Giroro started banging his head on the wall.

"The line is there with the arrows because they have a crush on you, Keroro." Dororo tried to be kind, and explain the situation to Keroro.

Keroro yet again thought Dororo was only talking about Mois. "Huh? Nah, that can't be." He shook his head. "Giroro's got things a little wrong doesn't he?"

Giroro just sighed. Dororo giggled a little despite himself. It was a rare and wonderful opportunity when you got to tease Keroro.

"I mean Mois's dating Kululu. So she can't like me." Keroro continued. That got Dororo to stop snickering immediately.

Giroro just stared at him. "Keroro...I didn't know you could reach a new level of dumb. But today you did."

"Why...W-why do you think that?" Dororo was trying to figure out if he was horrified at this idea, or if he wanted to burst out laughing at how dumb Keroro was.

"Well…." Keroro frowned trying to think. "I mean they're together a lot. And..." He tried to get some reasoning out of his theory. His face drained of color as he slowly realized that he was either being stupid, or incredibly cruel to Mois in his head. "They work together in the basement! They have a lot of time to do things we don't know about!" Now that the words were out about Kululu and Mois dating, Keroro couldn't be wrong. Being wrong was humiliating.

"Didn't you make them work together? Aren't they alone together because of you?" Giroro pointed out trying to show Keroro how incredibly loyal Mois was.

Keroro gasped. "You're right!" He covered his mouth. He had gotten them together. He was a monster.

"They aren't dating, Keroro." Dororo tried to say it slowly so Keroro could understand it. "I mean can you imagine anyone we know actually being in a real relationship that isn't incredibly complicated? Even Momoka and Fuyuki aren't dating."

Keroro frowned. Dororo's logic and reasoning was sound as always.

Giroro sighed because Dororo's logic was too sound for him to like, considering his own situation.

"Well..You're right that I can't imagine Kululu in a relationship..." Keroro frowned, because the more he thought about it the more wrong he might be. And that meant he was too dense to realize that Mois liked him. And he didn't want to be dense. Denseness were for the Hinata siblings and dummies. He was not a dummy. "But they definitely like each other! That's why you made a mistake putting Mois's line towards me."

Giroro sighed and sat down, no longer banging his head against the wall. Keroro was beyond stupid. "He's afraid of her, Keroro." He pointed out.

"I don't think he likes her very much. Perhaps he begrudgingly tolerates her, but that really is the best sort of opinion you can get from someone like Kululu." Dororo pointed out. "He doesn't like anyone!"

Keroro frowned. "He does! He does like her! And she definitely likes him not me. I mean the other day she said he was nice. Nobody would say Kululu was a nice person unless there was something going on!" Keroro insisted.

Giroro sighed again. Yet again Keroro didn't understand Mois's boundless kindness. "Fine. If you think they like each other so much why don't you prove it? Me and Dororo will even help. But if you can't, you've got to accept reality that Mois likes you instead of denying it so much."

Maybe if Keroro realized that Mois liked him and stopped being dense they'd get together. And the more Keroro was distracted by someone else, instead of his own self-destructive tendencies the more likely they were to invade, or Keroro would be less likely to disrupt Giroro's relationships. Keroro being in a happy relationship really was a win win for everyone because they didn't want to handle him themselves.

Keroro, determined to not have Mois be in love with him because then he'd be a dense idiot, nodded. "Fine! Fine! I'll prove it! Just ask them what they think of each other. Then you'll see how weird their relationship is."

Dororo glanced at Giroro. "I'll be happy to help. This...This is just sad." Sometimes the level that someone was in denial was just incredibly sad to watch. Even Dororo had a burst of pity.

* * *

The first test that Giroro suggested to prove to Keroro that Angol Mois and Kululu didn't like each other was just asking them what they thought of each other. It was simple and Giroro really hoped it would work.

Giroro was chosen to speak to Kululu because he went to see him the most to yell at him for whatever huge prank happened to him that day.

Once Giroro had gone to Kululu's lab to yell at him for somehow drawing little hearts into his pupils, making him look super weird, he had the opportunity to talk to Kululu.

"Ku, ku, ku, you'll have to remove the hearts yourself! I hear the solution might be soap. Directly into your eye." Kululu teased.

"I'll put soap in _your_ eyeball!" Giroro threatened. He was so done with Kululu. He turned around ready to leave and try...to put the soap in his eyeball. But then he remembered that he had agreed to talk to Kululu.

He sighed. "Hey, what do you think of the rest of the platoon?" He asked.

"Hmm? What brings this up?" Kululu asked, rather curious. "Ku! Oh, are you jealous that I don't pick on them as much as you? Well you always were my favorite!" He teased in a very creepy way.

 _Yeah to pick on. Why are people and large accidents so drawn to me?_ Red was supposed to be a lucky color, Giroro thought. Why was he so unlucky?

"Yeah kind of. I mean you aren't nearly as much of a jerk to them as me." Giroro pointed out.

Kululu made a 'bleh' noise. "I gotta up my game then. Ku, ku, ku. They're way too peaceful. Disgusting. Thank you for alerting me."

Giroro pitied his entire platoon. "But why? Why I was wondering? What makes me so much more appealing to be a jerk to than them? What do you think of Keroro?"

"He's my captain. And I know you're an idiot, but I'll remind you that Keroro is definitely the sort of person who would write up an official complaint for someone breaking his gundam model. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu answered. For once he looked sad that he couldn't prank Keroro nearly as much as he wanted.

"Tamama?" Giroro questioned.

"Ku, ku, ku. Oh don't worry. I make his life plenty miserable." Kululu grinned. Giroro felt a shiver run up his spine. He wondered if somewhere Tamama was shivering too.

"Dororo?" Giroro asked.

"Who was he again?" Kululu asked. It was clear that Dororo had avoided some of Kululu's pranks because he had just forgotten him. Perhaps that was the greatest jerky thing Kululu could do to him.

"Mois?" Giroro asked finally.

"I wasn't aware you were including Mois in that. She's not really part of the platoon." Kululu pointed out, somewhat confused. He raised a brow, like Giroro should have known why he avoided pranks on Mois. Mois remained unscathed because of his personal fear.

"Yeah, well I'm asking anyway what do you think of Mois?" Giroro asked.

Kululu trembled as if that was supposed to display all of his feelings.

"Besides that she's terrifyingly pure." Giroro added. "It always did confuse me why you disliked her so much but you picked on her so little." Giroro pointed out.

"I thought it was obvious." Kululu added, a hint of disgust on his tongue. How were the people around him so stupid? He valued himself highly and didn't want to die, so of course he didn't pick on Mois.

"You can't be that terrified of her though. I mean you two spend a lot of time together working. And you seem competent enough to do your work." Giroro pointed out. "So be frank with me, is it that she's such a good force that you just can't bring yourself to drop a spaceship on top of her like you do with me?"

"Our work relationship has nothing to do with my personal feelings towards her." Kululu reminded. "I'm one of the few in this platoon that seems competent enough to actually do work after all. I mean I even manage following the captain's dumb orders."

Giroro's eyes widened for a second. "You're not really giving me a straight answer of what you think of her." He realized. Was Keroro onto something? Or was he just getting wrapped up in Keroro's insane theory?

Kululu made a disgusted noise when he realized what Giroro was implying. "I tolerate her. Sometimes. Begrudgingly of course. She's pretty ditsy. Very Uncle obsessed, I mean that's pretty much every other sentence." He complained, "I don't like her, she's way too nice, like extremely nice, the inhumanely kind! But I don't like any of you. I can see how my degrees of dislike could be confusing to an idiot."

Giroro glared. Kululu was giving him an answer while insulting him on the side. That was so like Kululu.

"Mois's a simple minded individual. That makes her easy to understand in theory." Kululu explained.

Giroro ignored the 'in theory'. There was obviously a lot about Mois that confused Kululu that he didn't want to ask about. It was fun to think about teasing him and being the one in power for once, because Kululu himself probably hadn't predicted that he'd be afraid of her and didn't fully understand it, but he knew one victory would lead to many lost battles.

He wasn't prepared for Kululu's revenge.

Kululu glanced at Giroro. "That enough to satisfy you? Now you should probably hurry on up to throw that soap in your eye." He smiled for a moment. "Ku. It's so hard to take you seriously with those heart shaped pupils. Ku, ku, ku."

Giroro just growled. "I swear you are the worst. You're the one who needs soap everywhere. Especially in your rude mouth."

Kululu shrugged. "If I need my mouth washed, you need your brain scrubbed you've been having some nasty Natsumi thoughts."

Giroro blew him up with his gun.

* * *

It was up to Keroro to ask Mois what she thought about Kululu. After all she would never lie to him.

He was a little worried now that she wouldn't say something that tipped the scale in his theories favor. Or she said something that might actually mean that she liked him.

"Hey, Mois, can I ask you something?" Keroro asked. She was busy doing the laundry for him.

"Sure!" She beamed. "Ask away, Uncle. Questions from you are always good!" Maybe he even wanted to know more about her, it was rare to get Keroro's interest.

There was no need to be sneaky with Angol Mois, so Keroro just sputtered out his question. "What do you think of Kululu?"

Angol Mois answered incredibly quickly. "Not at all."

"Huh?" Keroro asked. He knew the statement was grammatically challenged, but he assumed it translated to not much. Keroro was worried for a second. _Does this mean my theory is wrong?_

"Oh! I thought you asked if I think about Kululu! Sorry." She apologized, a little bashfully. "Huh. What do I think of Kululu? Hmm..." She was a little curious why Keroro was asking, but how could she ever understand his mind? It worked in mysterious ways.

"Hmmm...I think he's a good person." She finally said. "He's very nice!" She beamed, hoping that was the right answer. "I think he does a lot of work for the platoon. He's a very hard worker. I don't know if you could invade without him. Not to say you couldn't do it on your own, Uncle. I just mean he's important to the whole group!" She eventually decided that Keroro was asking her advice on giving Kululu a raise.

Keroro smiled. "Knew it!" He said to himself. Nobody would say Kululu was nice unless they were incredibly biased. She had to like him!

Dororo dropped from a tree. "Uh-uh." He shook his head. "I don't think it's a bias causing that answer." He told Keroro.

Mois just looked confused. Where had Dororo even come from?

Dororo pointed to Mois. "Mois? What do you think of Tamama."

"Oh! He's really nice!" She beamed and replied again.

Keroro's smile faltered. He knew Tamama wasn't exactly the nicest to Mois. Maybe...it wasn't bias. Maybe she was just a little ignorant and thought everybody was nice.

"And what do you think of Keroro?" Dororo asked again.

"Super duper nice!" Mois replied again.

Now Keroro was frowning. He knew he wasn't exactly the nicest to Mois. After all she was doing the laundry that he was supposed to be doing. "Okay...Fine I guess I get your point." He sighed. "Everybody's nice in Mois's eyes."

He sighed. Maybe he really was reading too much into it.

* * *

"So you see, Keroro?" Giroro pointed out. "He really doesn't like Mois. And Mois...Well she just likes everybody. Including crap like Kululu. She thinks everybody is a good person."

Keroro slammed his fist on the table. "I won't give up!" He frowned. He really couldn't. He was too dedicated to the denial now.

Giroro sighed tiredly.

"Maybe I'm just the only person observant enough to notice they like each other!" Keroro insisted. "Maybe they're keeping it a secret. Or they're in denial."

"You? Observant?" Giroro teased. "I think not. How many people have a crush on you in our platoon?"

Keroro looked at him. "Giroro? You like me?" He asked shocked.

"I thought so. An idiot to the core." Giroro groaned, Keroro still having no idea that Tamama might like him at all.

Dororo just continued to feel a rush of pity for Keroro. "Well what next? What do we have to do until you realize that they don't like each other?"

Keroro thought for a moment. "The matchmaker test! It'll show how much they actually think of each other. Basically you ask the person who they would set up with the other person, and if they choose someone cool it means they think that person is cool! It'll show their real feelings."

Giroro sighed. He already knew that Kululu would never choose anyone good for anyone else. To him nobody was cool so this was bound to fail.

 _Maybe Saburo. Saburo's cool to him. But Saburo and Mois? That would be mine and Tamama's ideal situation but it's just never going to happen._ Giroro sighed.

He'd go off to ask.

* * *

"If you could set Mois up with someone, who'd you choose?" Giroro tried to ask Kululu walking into his lab while he was working.

"Excuse me?" Kululu asked. "Why's everybody's romantic trouble's my responsibility? Ku, ku, ku."

"I'm just curious. I mean...As Keroro's friend I always want to know if the girl hopelessly in love with him is the right match." Giroro pointed out.

Kululu thought for a moment. "Well I wouldn't choose Keroro for one. Tamama maybe? That would be pretty funny. Ku, ku, ku." He laughed.

Giroro winced. Tamama and Mois would be bad for both of them.

"Oooh! But what about you! That would be funny too! Ku, ku, ku." Kululu laughed, "There are a lot of hilarious options."

"...But not Keroro?" Giroro asked. Maybe this test was aiding Keroro's argument. After all Keroro was the least cool person Giroro could think of, and it was likely the same for Kululu.

"Of course not. Yuck." Kululu looked disgusted. "I'm not into that couples getting closure and being happy thing."

Giroro frowned. Keroro's theory was now down the drain.

"So you'd go with Tamama?" Giroro asked.

"Sure. That sounds like a nightmare. And I love nightmares. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu laughed.

Giroro walked away. _Yeah, Kululu's definitely not interested._

* * *

"Hey...Mois?" Keroro wondered how he'd ask this latest question. "If you had to set Kululu up with someone who would you choose?" If she chose someone cool, like himself, than it definitely meant she liked Kululu.

Mois frowned. "Set Kululu up with someone?" Her face scrunched up like she just couldn't imagine it. "Uhhh...I don't know. I don't think anyone really fits with him."

"But if you had to, who would you choose?" Keroro pushed.

Angol Mois stared blankly. "I don't know." She tried to think about it harder but just shook her head. "There's nobody I can really think of."

"Umm...Natsumi?" Keroro suggested trying to help her out.

Angol Mois quickly shook her head. "I think they'd kill each other before a first date even happened."

"Giroro?" Keroro asked.

"They wouldn't last a minute." Angol Mois replied again.

"...Koyuki?" Keroro was just throwing out names.

"I can't really see that." Angol Mois put her hands on her hips wondering why Keroro was trying to think so hard.

"...Lady Mom?" Keroro asked.

Angol Mois looked horrified. "No! Wouldn't he be like….Natsumi and Fuyuki's step dad if that worked out? I'm sorry, I just don't want to think about that."

Keroro agreed, secretly. That was hard to think about.

"...Me?" He suggested.

Mois's eyes widened. "U-uncle...D-do you like Kululu? A-are...Are you trying to get me to set you two up?" She seemed to be stuttering as if she had no idea what to do.

"No!" Keroro said hurriedly. "I was just trying to suggest names." He paused.

Maybe it wasn't a bad thing that Mois couldn't think of anyone. _This could be good for my theory. Maybe she's jealous._ It either was wonderful evidence in his favor or she just literally couldn't think of anyone and didn't want to stick anyone with Kululu.

Honestly nobody would probably blame her. They probably would have acted the same way in that situation. But he wasn't going to take the logical route.

"So let me get this straight," Keroro grinned, "You don't think anyone else would be a good match with Kululu?"

"..'Else'?" Mois wasn't sure how to take that. She was quiet for a moment. "Oh! Wait I have someone!"

Keroro frowned.

"Kululuko! You know that orange haired-" Angol Mois looked so proud.

"That's Kululu." Keroro frowned. He was sure that was the only answer anyone could come up with in the given situation though.

He sighed. The matchmaker test was a no go.

* * *

"See? They literally want the other person to be miserable." Giroro tried to reason with Keroro. Giroro frowned and revised the statement. "Well...Mois doesn't want Kululu to be miserable. She's just smart enough not to want anyone else to be miserable because they're dating him."

Keroro frowned. "I won't believe it! Maybe the matchmaker test just wasn't good. I mean of course if you were in love with someone you wouldn't want them to end up with someone who wasn't you. That's why Mois literally chose Kululu to end up with Kululu and Kululu..."

"Chose the gayest member of our platoon?" Giroro suggest.

Keroro just stared blankly at him. "I thought he chose Tamama?"

Giroro face palmed. He wanted to scream that Tamama was gay. But he didn't.

"But Kululu chose the safe option. Most likely Tamama doesn't like Mois. Probably. Maybe." Keroro wasn't too sure.

"If you start thinking that Tamama likes Mois, I'm going to stop helping you. Thinking Kululu likes Mois is just sad confusion. Thinking Tamama likes her is just unreal." Even Dororo was tired of how stupid Keroro was.

Keroro frowned. Well then he wasn't going to voice his thoughts about that.

"I got a new idea though!" Keroro smiled.

"I'm not talking to Kululu again." Giroro insisted.

"Fine, I'll do it." Keroro offered. "We'll just tell them the other person has a crush on them and see how they'll react."

"This is not going to go well." Dororo predicted realizing that Keroro was going to tell Kululu that Mois, the girl in love with Keroro was in love with Kululu. This was going to be a disaster.

"I gotta see this." Giroro smiled.

* * *

Keroro walked into Kululu's lab, Giroro and Dororo peering by the door edge to see what would happen.

"What'dya want, Captain? I'm working on repairs for the latest thing of mine you broke through your incompetence." Kululu sounded annoyed.

"Oh I just wanted to tell you a secret I learned. I thought you liked people's private information." Keroro had a broad grin on his face.

Kululu whirled around immediately interested. "I'm listening." He leaned on his hands. "I assume this information isn't coming for free?" He started to pull a drawer open with a gundam model in it.

Keroro licked his lips.

"Hmm...Maybe I should figure out if you have something of interest first." Kululu decided. "Who's this private information about?"

"Mois." Keroro replied.

Kululu hurriedly opened the drawer and tossed the gundam at Keroro. Keroro carefully caught it, desperate to not let it hit the ground and break.

"I'm always interested in Mois blackmail. I have so little of it compared to the rest of you. And I always knew you had a lot of interesting Mois facts that I just didn't have access to." Kululu seemed to be completely serious, lacking the information that Keroro was an idiot. "Perhaps even information on how she works, and how she manages to be so darn pure. Or perhaps just angolian information that aren't in any of the databases I search. Ku, ku, ku!" He seemed excited at whatever this was.

Keroro glanced behind him at Giroro and Dororo. _See! He wants to learn things about Mois! Doesn't that show he likes her?_ He tried to say.

Giroro and Dororo were just shivering and holding each other. They both felt incredible pity for Mois. They had no idea that Kululu was so desperate for Mois blackmail and looking for it so much.

"Well, what is it?" Kululu asked. "Speak!" He ordered Keroro.

"She has a crush on you." Keroro lied.

Kululu looked at him blankly for a moment. And then he started laughing louder than he had ever laughed before. "KU! KU! KU! KU!"

"Ha? Ha? Ha?" Keroro laughed back. Maybe Kululu was happy? It was always hard to tell what Kululu's laughs meant.

Kululu fell out of his chair, now crying with laughter, Keroro having no idea what the joke was. "Ku, ku, ku, oh man this is gold. The captain….Is much dumber than I thought!" He laughed to himself.

Keroro stood still, slowly realizing the joke Kululu was laughing at was his existence. He felt bad. "I'm not dumb! She really does have a crush on you."

"Man, captain this isn't Mois blackmail. This is you blackmail. I had no idea you were that dumb. This puts Natsumi and Fuyuki to shame." Kululu was still on the floor, wheezing.

"But she does like you!" Keroro insisted. And the honesty in his voice just made Kululu laugh harder.

"Ku, ku, ku, ku. I just have to wonder what made you choose me?" Kululu spoke to himself. "Wait...Is this the matchmaker test? Are you saying you like Mois so little that you set her up with me? Wow...Ku, ku, ku." Kululu snickered a bit harder, obviously knowing he was the lowest rung on this test.

Keroro was unaware he had even known about this test.

"That's just sad, Captain. Sad for Mois maybe. I bet she'd be horrified to know that you think I like her or that we'd be a good couple. I can just imagine the tears when she realizes you failed the matchmaker test with her. Hmm...That's actually pretty tempting to tell her. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu looked very sinister as he was planning a prank on Mois.

"I'm...Not being mean!" Keroro insisted. "I mean it! She has a huge crush on you!"

"Uh-huh. Sure. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu cried in laughter again. "And what makes you think that?"

"Well..." Keroro frowned trying to think. "She just really likes you! She thinks you're a nice person and says way too many nice things about you!"

"Ick. Jealousy. I just wanted a laugh, Captain." Kululu wrongfully thought Keroro was jealous. "And Mois thinks everybody is a nice person. It's one of her many scary qualities."

"But….She talks about you a lot!" Keroro tried to pull more reasons out of his butt. "And you two spend a lot of time together. And she seems willing to spend time with you! Instead of reluctant like a normal person!"

"You told us to work together." Kululu pointed out. "It's easy to get her to do things if she thinks you want them." He seemed tired of laughing now, and more annoyed at Keroro's stupid ideas than anything else. "After all can you name one moment that she's spent with me that has nothing to do with you?" He pointed out. "You're the major factor in her decisions and toleration towards me. And it's because she's in love with you, not me, idiot." Kululu laughed again. "Ku, can't believe you had no clue that she liked you!"

"Just because multiple people think she likes me doesn't make it true!" Keroro insisted in utter denial. "And..." He tried to think of any moment that the two of them had hung out outside of work that didn't have to do with him. "Doesn't she help you show off your inventions? Uhhh...shopping for materials for invasions? I don't know. I'm not you two."

"It's all for you." Kululu pointed out. No longer as amused. He didn't want to be the one to pound the truth into Keroro's head. He wasn't kind after all. He crossed his arms. "Outside of work she's always busy with you. She never tries to spend time with me." He pointed out. "Which is incredibly lucky for me. Ku." He added quickly. "I mean when she does seem interested in what invention I'm making it's for you and your invasion. Probably. Or she's just incredibly pure. She's confusing. But...One of the things I know about that enigma is that you aid all of her choices. So it's definitely for you."

Keroro narrowed his eyes. There was a bit of rambling at the end. And it did seem like maybe she was spending time with Kululu outside of work but it was difficult to find out if that was because she saw that as work too. Mois was sometimes too kind for her own good and did things that weren't exactly fun.

"She doesn't like me." Keroro insisted again before walking out of the room. As he said that Kululu started laughing again.

"See Keroro?" Giroro pointed out. "He didn't seem interested in that at all." Giroro was giggling a little bit to himself.

"I do see that Kululu was perhaps...A better person than we thought." Dororo was trying desperately not to giggle at Keroro's misfortune too. "I mean he was trying to convince you of the truth too. That's...Something out of pity, right?" Dororo was hopeful. "But yeah. He didn't seem interested at all."

"No. I think I got it." Keroro was still desperate to cling to this idea. "He thought Mois liked me because he was paranoid! He's jealous!" He insisted wildly.

"UGH!" Giroro just banged his head against a wall again.

"Keroro...Why do you think that?" Dororo hoped that his disappointed voice would help Keroro with reason when he couldn't come up with a reason.

"Well he seemed super annoyed that she spent time with him because of me. That's jealousy, right?" Keroro replied.

"He seems annoyed all the time." Giroro pointed out. "Over everything."

"He did seem a little disappointed that she wasn't spending time with him outside of work." Dororo admitted tapping his chin.

"DORORO!" Giroro yelled. "We're trying to stop this weird idea!"

Dororo looked apologetic. "I'm sorry. I'm not saying he likes her. Maybe he's just lonely and wants friends. And Mois's willing to give everybody her friendship. Maybe Kululu has feelings-"

"He stuck a rotten egg under your hat once." Giroro reminded.

Dororo glared. "He has no feelings. I will never forget the rotten egg I was looking for for a day." He crossed his arms. He had been sleeping peacefully and then suddenly...rotten egg!

Giroro nodded, now Dororo was on the right track.

"I...I guess Mois is next..." Keroro frowned. Would she laugh at him too?

No sweet, kind, Mois would never laugh at him!

* * *

Giroro and Dororo didn't hide this time, but they didn't walk up with Keroro they were just in the same room to see how badly this would go.

"Umm...Mois..You'd believe me if I told you something, right?" Keroro asked.

"Of course!" Mois smiled and beamed. "I'd always believe you, Uncle! You're always right and would never lie to me."

"Kululu has a crush on you." Keroro tried.

"I don't believe you!" She beamed again.

Keroro's spirit cracked. _What an honest answer._ He felt like he was fading away.

She just kept smiling as he faded away.

He tried to regain his confidence. "But he does! He...Uhhh..." he tried to think up a lie. "He wants to go on a date with you! That's gotta mean he likes you, right?"

Mois didn't have an immediate answer at that moment. She thought for a moment. "...But why would he tell you this, Uncle? I didn't think you two were that close." She had more common sense that day than Keroro.

Keroro frowned. "I thought you'd say you would always believe me!" He pointed out.

"Yeah, but..." Mois looked guilty. It just seemed so much like a lie. She looked down at her feet.

"He was sad and was asking advice. Since I'm so popular, obviously." Keroro pointed to himself.

Mois's eyes widened. Keroro was popular. "Oh! Okay! That makes sense."

Keroro smiled.

Mois let what Keroro was saying sink in. "Wait!? Wait!? What-?" She eventually burst out. "K-kululu likes me?" She sounded completely confused and her voice was much louder than normal.

Giroro sighed. "We shouldn't have had faith in the person who fell in love with Keroro, Dororo. She's stupid too."

"Sometimes stupidity flocks together." Dororo handed Giroro a cup of tea he had brewed.

Giroro drank it. He needed something to calm him down from this nonsense.

"Yep! He has this huge crush on you!" Keroro was so glad someone was believing him. _Mois's giving a normal reaction too instead of laughing. We've finally gotten through that curve of just not believing me._

Mois just blushed. "I had no idea! I just thought he really wanted to go see a movie because he would get in free because nobody would be able to see him in the pekoponian movie theaters! So I kept suggesting people who would like the movie titles better that he was suggesting." Mois moaned in horror. "Oh no...I was rejecting him without even knowing it wasn't I?"

"Huh?" Giroro and Dororo both turned around.

"Umm….What's this about the movies, Mois?" Now Keroro was also confused. Maybe it sounded a little like Kululu was trying to hang out with her, but part of him never believed that he'd hear something like that.

"You know how you're invisible to pekoponians? I just thought it was a scheme for free movie tickets!" Mois yelled again, quite distraught. "I mean that sounds so Kululu. Like really really Kululu."

"It does...Was Kululu trying to go to the movies for free?" Keroro asked. "Dang. That's a good idea. Going with a pekoponian. I'll have to ask Fuyuki to take me to the movies now. I mean he won't like doing something illegal but if I choose a space movie..."

Mois frowned. "No, Uncle! He was asking me on a date! Because you said he was asking you for dating advice about me, remember?" Mois reminded. "So it wasn't a scheme to go to the movies for free."

Keroro frowned. _I did want Mois to take my lie seriously. But now she's applying it to an evil scheme._

"Hold on." Giroro walked over, Dororo following behind him. "Explain what happened again? I can probably provide some insight on if it was sinister or not. I mean with Kululu it's always safe to assume something is sinister right."

"This is just a case of you could say, the jerk who cried wolf." Mois looked frazzled. "I really had no idea!"

"I don't think it is a case of the boy who cried wolf." Giroro tried to comfort her. "I think he really was just being a jerk." He glared at Keroro, now Mois was just extremely confused. "Explain what happened."

"Well...Every now and then Kululu asks if I'm free to see a movie with him, and names one that's in theaters. I asked him the first time if he wanted to see a movie with me because I was confused why he would ask and he said he didn't, he just wanted to get in for free at a pekoponian theater because he thought it would be funny. So I suggested someone who would have more free time to go to the movies with him!" Mois frowned. "But if those were dates like Uncle said than I was rejecting him with no knowledge of it."

Giroro sighed. He pat Mois on the back awkwardly. "I don't think you were rejecting him or making him feel bad at all. Don't worry. I think he really did want a free seat."

"Or to show you a horror movie. Kululu does like those. He probably wanted to see you scared since you scare him so often." Dororo assured.

Mois smiled for a moment. "That does sound like Kululu. And most of the titles were horror movies. So I guess that makes sense."

Keroro sighed. His lie was being exposed. "...Horror movies are a date movie you know." He nudged Mois back in the wrong direction. It was a little interesting seeing her freak out.

Mois's eyes widened. "You're right! And there were so many other clues!" She moaned. "Like that he kept suggesting other things that interested me as if tailoring it specifically to me."

"Yeah he definitely wanted to make you scared." Giroro sighed. "I guess the real reason he doesn't prank you as much as me is because you somehow luckily fall out of his grasp by..."

"Saying I promised to spend time with Uncle." Mois sighed. "That must have been especially mean if he was asking me out."

Keroro nodded. "That explains his jealousy then!" He was all for this theory, nodding along. Dororo glared at him.

"You're confusing the poor girl!" Dororo frowned. "Keroro this is the end of it, I'm going to tell you the truth. They don't like each other. Kululu does not have a crush-"

"Maybe I should have realized it when he said it could be like a date or something. God, I'm really dense aren't I? I mean there really were so many clues that he liked me! But as usual Uncle is just so smart he just knows these things. Thanks for telling me Uncle I really had no idea!"

Giroro and Dororo were utterly silent.

Keroro grinned. He had been right this whole time! He knew it! "So he asked you on a date, Mois? And you still didn't know he was asking you on a date? Wow, you really are dense." He rubbed in. "I'm not the dense one guys, see? See?" He was so happy! "I was right this whole time! He really does like her!"

Mois frowned a little bit. "What do you mean...You were right the whole time, Uncle? I thought you knew this from the beginning. I mean you were the one who told me Kululu liked me."

Keroro squeaked and became silent because Mois's big eyes were staring at him and realizing that he had lied.

"He lied." Giroro told her. "...We all had no idea he was actually trying to ask you out. That...That's so bizarre. He..." Giroro was in shock, "He doesn't have feelings. He also said that he disliked you! Was he lying?"

Mois was glaring for once at Keroro. "You lied to me?" She crossed her arms. "Uncle! I can't believe it!"

"I mean I might have lied but it made you realize how Kululu truly felt!" Keroro defended. "So it was a good lie."

Mois sighed in what could only be explained as annoyance. "He doesn't like me." She insisted. "Okay...Maybe I thought everything made a little bit of sense because of what Uncle said. His fascination with trying to learn more about me and figure me out. Him fainting when I looked at him. Stuff like that. But that was cuz Uncle lied! He doesn't actually like me, Kululu just thinks of me as a good friend."

"What about the date then, Mois?" Keroro teased. "How do you explain that."

Mois thought for a moment. "Maybe he was desperate for me to just come with him, and he thought a date would be harder to say no to and say that I was busy with Uncle? I mean...Giroro and Dororo could be right that he just really wants to scare me."

Giroro did nod to that. It did make sense. "He underestimated your love for Keroro then."

Keroro ignored that.

Mois nodded. "But that seems reasonable. I mean it's not like he's ever said he likes me, or anything else. And when I ask him what he thinks of me he usually says he just tolerates me and if I stare at him longer than that for an answer he says I confuse him and then he eventually breaks something important." She threw up her hands in defeat.

Giroro winced. Yeah he never was sure about Kululu.

"Well there's only one way to know if I was wrong or not, Mois!" Keroro cheerfully got back in the game. "You have to accept going to the movies with him!"

"K-keroro...Don't say that." Dororo winced.

"She'll do it. Because you asked her to." Giroro frowned. That...really wasn't good for anyone. Mois especially.

Mois thought for a moment not hearing what Giroro and Dororo said. "Okay." She agreed. "I'm pretty curious too. And if it turns out it was a sinister scheme it won't be the end of the world. Maybe it will be unique to be jerked off by Kululu!"

"Victim of Kululu's schemes." Keroro corrected. "Better phrasing."

Mois nodded. But she seemed excited at figuring things out too now.

* * *

The next day during the evening Giroro assumed that Mois had finished her date. Kululu hadn't pranked him after all and had seemed incredibly dedicated to his computer that day, cackling sometimes to himself.

"How was it?" Keroro tried to get Mois alone.

"It was a lot of fun!" Mois beamed.

"But was it a date?" Keroro asked hurriedly.

Mois thought for a moment. She shrugged and didn't really answer.

Keroro glanced to Giroro.

Giroro sighed. He knew what he had to do. Ask Kululu. Because Mois was probably confused as heck.

* * *

Giroro walked up to Kululu who was working on his computer. He seemed very interested in his work, so much so that he didn't notice Giroro walking over to him in the camera in the corner of his screen.

Giroro noticed that the documents Kululu were organized were labeled 'Mois database'. He looked a little annoyed, biting his lip every now and then and hissing to himself. "I should have known!" and "I can't believe it!" or "This is important information to add, perhaps the larger picture will make more sense now."

None of it made Giroro think Kululu and Mois had gone on a date. In fact it seemed more like she was a science experiment than anything else.

"Hey." Giroro waved.

Kululu whirled around. "Where did you come from?" He sweated for a second. "Oh never mind." He had probably gotten wrapped up in his work. "What do you want? Natsumi's schedule for today?"

"No! I'm not that creepy." Giroro defended, tempted by the offer. "Uhhh...I wanted to see how you were doing." He tried to seem innocent.

Kululu glared. "You on board with that stupid captain theory?" He teased, realizing Giroro probably knew he and Mois had gone out that day. He crossed his arms. "Man what is up with that? Is he in denial of his own feelings or something. It's gotta be something like that. I just don't care enough to analyze it."

"Uhh...Well you did go on a date with her today." Giroro tried to test the water.

Kululu instantly glanced at him. "Is that what she said?"

"Ummm...Not exactly. She shrugged when asked." Giroro replied.

Kululu quickly added something to the document that Giroro couldn't see. "Hmm…." He said to himself, "That's interesting. I wasn't expecting that. Ku, ku, ku."

Giroro frowned. "You don't seem...that unhappy with that answer. I mean...You can't really be that mad at Keroro's theory if you just went on a date with her. I mean you've gotta know that, right?" Giroro asked.

"We didn't go on a date." Kululu corrected.

Giroro relaxed a little. That was the confirmation he wanted. "So you really did just want to scare her from a horror movie?"

Kululu looked frustrated at that question. "I did!" He threw up his hands in defeat. "But it turns out she likes horror movies. I made sure to even work on the film behind the scenes and up the gore. But you know what happened-"

"...What?" Giroro asked realizing Kululu wanted him to ask.

"She giggled! Like that cute sort of kind giggle! But someone was literally being ripped into pieces by a zombie! What the heck? I mean I laughed too, but I laugh at everything." Kululu yelled. "I can't figure her out at all. She's the nicest creature on the planet, yet she's super into all this destruction stuff. I'm supposed to be a genius but she frustrates me! She's so confusing! Nothing about her or anything she does makes any sense. Nor can I predict it!" He was venting now. "Tell me, Giroro, has anyone ever just made such little sense to you that you felt that you were getting stupider? Oh wait, you're already at the stupidest level."

Giroro watched Kululu vent having never seen him so frustrated. He decided to ignore the insult. "I thought someone giggling at gore with you would have been like your dream date or something." He said off handidly.

"Yeah. It was pretty cool." Kululu said a little dreamily.

Giroro's eyes widened.

"But that doesn't matter! Ku, it's the fact that I couldn't scare her that matters I had the whole thing completely planned out. Now I need to find a new plan and revise all my Mois information. Ku." Kululu went back to typing. "I'll figure out something eventually."

"You know...It doesn't really help your case of not liking her when you're so obsessed with her." Giroro pointed out.

"I'm not obsessed." Kululu denied. "I have an average amount of curiosity to something I can't figure out." He paused. "If you want to focus on someone obsessed with Mois talk to Tamama, or better yet Captain who seems so embarrassed that she has a crush on him that he's started up this whole theory that she likes me."

"I mean….She went on what she thought was a date with you….And she didn't know if it was a date. That doesn't seem like just a theory now." Giroro pointed out.

Kululu paused for a second, he didn't seem to have a retort for that. "I'll investigate that matter on my own." He said a little quietly to himself, "But the greater facts remain that Keroro didn't really know any of that would happen, he was lying. So perhaps you should focus on your friend's feelings instead of me."

Giroro felt a stone in his stomach Kululu was right.

And with that he left the lab as Kululu continued typing away.

* * *

 **In the original one shot Kululu and Mois started dating at the end but I wanted it to be longer.**

 **I've actually finished up the entire story and will be posting it soon.**

 **Please review.**


	2. Documentation

**Sorry for not updating this recently even though I had all of it finished. I was in a lot of pain/sick.**

 **Anyway I wrote this chapter before I decided it would be a full story, I just wanted to write the previous chapter from Kululu's perspective because I felt like there was not enough kurumois in this kurumois story so far.**

* * *

Kululu watched from his computer as Keroro talked about something idiotic, some sort of sleepover thing.

 _I'm not supposed to be a part of this am I?_ He hoped. As Keroro rejected Tamama it became clear that it was a Dororo, Giroro, Keroro thing only.

That worked out fine for him. After all, he had work to do. Pranks to plan and experiments to run on Giroro. All sorts of intellectual endeavors that had nothing to do with friendly sleepovers.

 _And…_ His eyes wandered over to Mois who also hadn't been invited. _This means that she won't have as good of an excuse._

For the last month Kululu had been desperately trying to set up a prank on Mois. He was going to take her to some horror movies and scare the heck out of her. It just wasn't fair that he didn't get to laugh at her as much as everybody else.

 _I bet she's super cute when scared. Ku, ku, ku._ No matter how hard it was to get her to spend time with him, it would all be worth it once he got her to the movie theater. He was sure the entire event would be everything he dreamed of and more.

He could just imagine her screaming, him laughing, and her cowering in fear just like he did all the time around her. Since she was Mois of course, she'd probably try to grab his arm or something for support and cling onto it.

He'd allow her too of course, because he'd be having such a good time relishing his victory. And it would be interesting to examine.

For some reason his skin prickled at the imagery of Mois holding onto him. Her hand wound tightly around his.

He waved his hand like it was on fire, trying to shake out the imaginary feeling. _That...felt weird._

Mois was an interesting specimen. Even when she wasn't paying direct attention to him, she could still zap him and make him feel terror through the force of sheer imagination. It was annoying but also something to deeply examine.

Once he got back to his lap he wrote down the latest observations to his journal about Mois. He tried to keep track every time he had a fear episode just so he could try to figure them out. It was best to know one's fear after all.

He knew that once he knew Mois and could read her better she'd probably be less scary. He was just having trouble examining her at the moment.

 **Day 1,853 of the Mois phenomenon**

Kululu wrote down.

 **Yet again she jumped me while I was analyzing the possibility of her initiating physical contact with my arm. Body exhibits symptoms of disease, possibility some sort of fever, but immediately goes away when the thoughts stop. The phenomenon continues to be mysterious.**

He nodded to his entry.

 **The logical truth of the possibility of her touching me during the latest plan to get her to be as scared as me, remains minimal though. She doesn't seem to like physical contact with me.**

Kululu frowned remembering her holding him on Easter Island. That event had surprised him a lot and had made him need to revise all his statements of Mois before. Not the fact that she had jumped at a loud noise and had grabbed him, but the fact that it was her that had stopped the encounter, dropping him on the ground, quickly looking away and never mentioning the whole thing again.

It really mimicked embarrassment, which just completely confused him. It baffled him really. It made him really want to analyze the situation more, and initiate another contact like that.

Perhaps that was one of the reasons he was so excited over the idea of her holding his hand at the movies. Finally he'd get another situation to analyze like that one.

Kululu eventually got out his phone after updating his document to text Mois. "Do you want to go to the movies, tonight?" He texted her. "There's actually a movie that's playing that you like!" He added.

Sure his end plan was to get her to go to a horror movie with him, but perhaps she'd be more likely to agree the first time if he suggested a romance movie. She loved romances.

 _Ku. And I could probably tease her about the fact that I asked her to a romance movie and not her beloved Uncle. That would sure to ellicit some sort of reaction that I hadn't measured._ Kululu hadn't ever tried teasing her about their relationship to measure her reaction for his database, he didn't ever usually have any desire to have her talk more about Keroro than usual, but he might not mind as much if they went on something like a date.

 _It isn't really a date of course. It's a scheme that'll only end in her utter fear._ He grinned to himself. She didn't….Need to know it wasn't a date though. In fact he had even tried a few times to say it was a date under hope that she was more likely to spend some sort of time with him.

She had either rejected him sternly or continued to be hugely oblivious to the fact that he was asking her to spend time with him. He was still trying to overly analyze each situation to try to figure out which one it was leaning more towards.

His phone buzzed pretty quickly. "Sorry! I'm really sleepy. I have to nap. Which movie did you like?"

Kululu sighed in annoyance. Most of the time she was busy doing Keroro's chores, and now she had to sleep? He did understand that she needed her sleep, but it still annoyed him a little bit. He had been so excited that Keroro wasn't around right now!

"My Heart is Yours." He texted back the most sappy, cheesy romance movie in theaters. Maybe she would be so interested in seeing it she'd put off sleeping for a few more hours.

"Oh! That's a really good one I've heard! People say the cinematography and soundtrack is great!" Angol Mois sent a heart emoji afterwards.

Kululu stuck out his tongue. "Nobody says that." He said to himself. He found his eyes drawing to the heart on the screen.

 **Seems to send emoji hearts frequently when she's happy.** Kululu added to his documents. **Emoji hearts stab at my heart. Truly a terrifying power.**

His phone buzzed with a new Mois text. "Hmm...How about you take...Natsumi? I think she was interested in seeing that movie. And I wouldn't want to hold you back from going to it."

Kululu sighed in annoyance. Why did she keep doing this? Suggesting he take other people? Was this her hinting that she didn't want to spend time with him? _I wanted to go with you though._ He thought slightly to himself.

He let her sleep and didn't bother her anymore that night.

* * *

Kululu didn't watch Keroro's lame sleepover through his cameras. He didn't really care about a childhood friendship reignited.

And the next day he did his planned prank on Giroro, which hadn't been nearly as hard as he thought it would be. All he had to do with modify Giroro's DNA in such a way that his pupils were heart shaped, and then create something that would reverse it via soap. It was the sort of chemistry that should have been difficult but wasn't.

"Ku, ku, ku." He waited as usual for Giroro to yell at him and beat him up. Which he eventually did.

Eventually after threatening Kululu, Giroro asked an odd question. He started asking Kululu what he thought of the rest of the platoon.

 _He must be jealous. Oh how interesting!_ It was true he picked on Giroro the most. It was because Giroro was so tightly wound and gave such funny reactions.

He answered Giroro's questions easily, reminding himself every now and then to be more of a jerk to the people Giroro thought he was being too nice to. Eventually Giroro came to Mois's name though.

Kululu answered just like he had with everybody else sometimes not exactly giving an answer.

"Be frank with me." Giroro demanded trying to get more information. It was as if Kululu wasn't being descriptive enough that he was terrified of her!

"Our work relationship has nothing to do with my personal feelings for her." Kululu hurriedly reminded. He then went on to address how great he was.

Giroro seemed to be thinking something weird, "You're not really giving me a straight answer of what you think of her."

 _Oh wait. Does he think I'm hiding something?_ Kululu realized with disgust. _He and the rest of the people around me do seem to pretty relationship obsessed. I bet he thinks that because I'm not as big of a jerk to her as everyone else I l-li...Have positive endorphins for her._

Well Kululu wasn't having any of that. "I tolerate her." He tried to remain calm and answer Giroro's question, "Begrudgingly of course." He added.

This didn't seem to be enough information for Giroro, because he was still waiting for a more in depth answer.

 _He's perverse. Why does he want to know so much about my feelings for Mois anyway?_ He didn't like expressing himself. But insulting people? He could do that.

"She's pretty ditsy." She was, she could get very easily side tracked. "Very Uncle obsessed." He added. "I mean that's pretty much every other sentence." He tried not to grit his teeth or look annoyed in the least bit. He hated that obsession. It was so annoying.

How could he analyze someone who only talked about someone else? Keroro wasn't her. He couldn't learn more about her from that.

"I don't like her, she's way too nice, like extremely nice, the inhumanely kind!" Kululu said hurriedly. Now the fear was rising in his voice. He had to keep himself calmer. _Nice isn't an insult to normal people._ He reminded.

It was time to insult Giroro now. "But I don't like any of you. I can see how my degrees of dislike could be confusing to an idiot." Kululu chuckled as Giroro turned redder in anger.

"Mois's a simple minded individual." Kululu layered on the insult to finish his statement. "That makes her easy to understand, in theory." He didn't realize he had added the in theory until it was too late.

 _Don't show weakness to these people. Don't let them know you can't figure her out either._ She was a mysterious force.

He hoped that was enough to satisfy Giroro, he hurriedly changed the topic back to his eyes and eventually ended up blasted.

* * *

Eventually Giroro came back to him, oddly enough. Something about setting Mois up.

 _Is he an idiot? Mois likes captain, so even though she's single he can't set her up with anyone._ He didn't even know why Giroro would be interested in setting her up. Make Keroro jealous maybe? Lead Kululu into suggesting Saburo so Giroro could take out his love rival by seducing him with an absolutely beautiful girl?

Kululu didn't know, but he was going to avoid suggesting Saburo.

"I'm just trying to make sure the girl hopelessly in love with him is the right match." Giroro insisted.

 _Oh._ Kululu realized. No way was Giroro trying to aid Keroro's happy ending. This was some sort of matchmaker test wasn't it? He had read about this once, trying to see if someone was interested in someone else by judging if they'd set them up with someone they knew who was attractive.

 _Why's he doing the matchmaker test to me and Mois though?_ He wanted to know, but he wasn't going to ask.

He wondered quickly who should he choose to quickly fail this thing. Himself? He was the lowest rung on this thing, right? After all he was super unattractive. And creepy. _Nah, saying myself would probably make it seem like I was actually interested in her. Which I'm not._

He eventually named Tamama, because Tamama was the worst for Mois, it would hurt both of them, and Tamama was extremely gay.

All good reasons to name him.

He watched as all interest in this conversation drained out of Giroro's eyes.

* * *

Eventually Keroro entered his lab, not Giroro. Kululu would have been annoyed if Keroro hadn't held the fact that he had private information of Mois's.

Kululu couldn't contain his interest, and immediately became completely focused on the subject at hand, getting this private information.

 _If anyone has Mois blackmail, Mois information I'm missing, it's him. I mean...He was there in her childhood. He probably has all her secrets._ Was this some sort of cute information like her favorite song? He already had that. Maybe something embarrassing like her ideal crush before she became obsessed with Keroro? He would like to know if there was any dreams before Keroro became her identity.

Or was it some sort of horrifying blackmail? Or was it about how angolian society worked and angols? Any of it could be good. He just desperately wanted to learn.

What Keroro had turned out to be a whole lot of none sense. He was just so dense that he somehow had this idea that Mois had a crush on Kululu.

This caused Kululu to laugh. A lot.

Keroro tried to convince him that it was the truth.

"Is this the matchmaker test?" Kululu eventually asked. It was really tempting to tell Mois that Keroro had failed it so badly he thought that Kululu would be a good match for her. Sure, she'd probably cry, but it would be hilarious.

Keroro seemed frustrated, in a childish way where he pouted and pounded his feet on the ground. He tried to reason how Mois thought Kululu was a nice person.

 _Ah so he's jealous of me._ He had hoped that he wouldn't be in the Hinata basement when Keroro began realizing his feelings for Mois. He just didn't want to be around for that disgusting event.

"She talks about you a lot!" Keroro continued.

 _Does she?_ That was hard to believe. Kululu was pretty sure Keroro was lying. After all she talked about Keroro constantly around him. But it would be karma if she talked about him around Keroro.

"And you two spend a lot of time together. And she seems willing to spend time with you! Instead of reluctant like a normal person!"" Keroro continued.

At this, Kululu frowned. _She...She does seem reluctant to spend time with me. Like a normal person._ He realized. What if Mois wasn't just busy with Keroro? What if she was purposefully using Keroro as an excuse so she didn't have to tell Kululu she didn't want to spend time with him?

Kululu could feel this weird sort of insecurity bubble up inside of him. He pushed it down reminding himself that Mois was a normal person. And that was a normal person thing to do. He couldn't be hurt by cold hard facts that he should have known.

The real reason they hung out at all was because of Keroro after all. And he was sure to remind Keroro of that. That there was nothing at all between him and Mois.

He soon sent Keroro out, much too annoyed with how dumb he was to be amused any longer.

* * *

The third person to come into his lab that day was someone he never expected. It was Mois herself.

"What do you need? Does the captain need something?" Kululu asked. Sometimes he sent Mois to ask him things. He was more likely to help Mois than Keroro after all, it usually had a sinister price that was Keroro's gundam models though.

"Um...I was wondering…." Mois was looking at her feet. "Did you want to go out tomorrow?"

Kululu felt himself become completely confused. _She's free?_ Then he noticed how...oddly embarrassed she looked. He tried to mentally recite all his notes ever on Mois. Did this behavior fit with anything he knew about Mois?

No, it didn't. What was going on.

"Out? Like...Out-out? Outside?" Kululu felt himself stumbling on words. He hoped those stumbled words were only in his head. Or else he'd look very stupid. _It's the fear. It's jumbling my speech._ He realized.

"To the movies." Mois clarified. "You...Wanted to see a movie with me, right?" She reminded.

"Oh! Uhh yeah!" Kululu gained his composure. His plan to frighten Mois could finally be used. "I've been wanting to see a movie titled 'the Last Night," You interested in accompanying me?" He asked hoping she didn't recognize the horror title.

Mois beamed in that all too innocent and sweet way. "I would love to." She leaned down to be on better eye level with Kululu.

It made Kululu feel like he'd die. Every part of him was screaming for her to move away, but he just couldn't stop looking at her sweeping her hair out of her eyes. What the heck was this? _Hypnotism._ He decided. _That must be an angolian ability. I can't stop looking at her._

"I'm sorry I didn't accept any of your invitations before. I kinda thought that you just wanted to watch a movie in general! Not one with me. So I kept naming other people who would like those movies." She giggled a bit to herself. "But I'm extremely happy you want to watch something with me! I'm excited for it!"

It was the sort of purity that sent Kululu shivering. _She wasn't just rejecting me all the time. Of course she wasn't. She's Mois._ It fit with all his research on Mois. He hated how she seemed genuinely excited.

"O-okay. Tomorrow night then. It's a date." He nodded. He meant that in more of a, it's confirmed, term, realizing only too late what he had said.

He wondered quickly how he could backtrack.

But for some reason Mois smiled wider. "Okay!" She nodded, excitedly. She covered her smile with her hand, rather shyly and left his lab before he could clarify.

He sat there for a moment, frozen for a while. But he eventually regained his sense of movement to think two things.

 _I've gotta update my document on Mois, I didn't realize how dense she was._ She hadn't realized at all that he was trying to ask her to the movies, although he couldn't really blame her. _She hasn't ever had anyone interested in her companionship before. She's just been so focused in chasing after Keroro her whole life._ Despite her love of romance, it didn't seem unusual that she was dense.

He also realized that he had to start editing movie footage to make sure that Mois was as scared as he hoped she'd be.

He wasn't going to give up operation terrify Mois (into maybe holding his hand) although he would never add that last part.

This was something he had been trying to get to happen for the last month. It didn't matter what he had accidentally said.

* * *

The entire next day Kululu was busy planning, and eventually it was time for the movie. Kululu tried to pretend it was just normal, that he wasn't buzzing with excitement.

How jumpy would she be? Would she scream? Maybe she'd tremble as much as he did around her.

He went into the movie theater following her lead and sitting next to her. He had already hacked the theater with a scarier version of the same movie, redoing effects was child's play, and it would make things like the gore more realistic.

"I'm excited! This is the first movie we're seeing together, isn't it?" Mois chattered.

"We've watched movies loads of times, Mois." Kululu reminded. Of course other people had been there, and she usually was sitting right next to Keroro listening to him give his very nerdy opinions, but they had still been in the same room for watching a movie.

"Yeah, but..." Mois frowned trying to figure out the right words. How could she politely mention the lack of Keroro? "This is the first time that it's just you and me. That makes it more special, right?" She beamed.

Kululu didn't know how he could answer that without confirming that this was special. "Uh, um." He decided to just kinda stutter. "Oh look the movie's starting. I heard this is a really good one. Ku, ku, ku." As usual his laughter was sinister. Mois could hardly notice that though.

Mois quickly glanced at the screen, hopeful and optimistic for the fun film that Kululu had recommended.

"Ku, ku, ku." Kululu chuckled again. He absolutely couldn't wait for her to freak out. He placed his hand subtley on the chair arm, in case she needed to grab it.

 _When she gets scared and grabs me I bet she'll be embarrassed afterwards. That'll be fun to watch._ He could only clarify her embarrassment from touch if she did it again after all. And it was soon to happen.

The movie started up, with it's normal horror premise, which Kululu had added a little too just to make it a little more realistic and less cheesy. Mois watched the movie in awe.

Kululu pretended not to watch Mois, cracking a joke every now and then about the movie, and laughing when he knew something horrible was about to happen since he had all the spoilers.

He waited for Mois to jump, to tremble, or anything that resembled fear. But her eyes remained on the screen, sparkling as always.

"Oooh!" She smiled, "What pretty visual effects." She whispered to Kululu.

Kululu frowned. "They're tearing that guy apart."

"Yes, but the blood is so artistic isn't it?" Mois asked. "I read an article once online about appreciating filmogrophy. You've gotta think about the person putting all this work into crafting this thing. It's like an art piece!" She said innocently.

Kululu twitched in annoyance. _Art piece? Art piece!? Can you really be that innocent?_

As the movie continued, he realized she could be. The sparkling never stopped. Ever. Her eyes remained large and invested in the movie. She didn't seem to jump in surprise ever, or look unnerved once.

"You know, if you get scared or something that's all right." Kululu tried to hint. "This is a pretty gorey movie. I can understand that being too much for a nice, innocent girl like you."

"Oh! Don't worry it's not scaring me." Angol Mois happily reassured him. "I like it!"

Kululu twitched again. _Could it be...Extreme levels of gore don't make her the least bit uncomfortable?Not scared in the least bit?_ In fact sometimes Mois looked like she was enjoying the whole thing. The expression on her face was similar to when she was destroying a planet….

 _God. I took a planet destroyer to a horror movie. How stupid could I be? Of course this sort of stuff wouldn't scare her. In fact...This plot even resembles the cliché apocalypse plot! She's loving all of this!_ Kululu wanted to scream. Little sirens were going off in his head saying 'critical failure'.

He was an idiot.

"Oh! I'm sorry were you scared, Kululu?" Angol Mois asked, wondering if he had asked because he himself had been unnerved. "I'm right here if you need anything." She offered kindly.

Kululu grinded his teeth, frustrated by the kindness. "Of course I'm not scared. I like this sort of stuff."

"Me too! Aww, it's fun finding things in common, isn't it?" Mois looked at him with this smile on her face, like she was totally invested in this. The way she just said things easily, gave him undivided attention made him feel like he would faint. It wasn't from the scary movie, it was from the scary person next to him.

He bit down on his thumb to stop his teeth grinding in frustration. Once he had taken his arm off the armrest, she put her arm down.

 _It's like she's mocking me._ Kululu decided. _Offering her hand if I need it. That's not how this was going to work._ He stared at her way too competitively. She was supposed to be the one scared for once. Not him!

But she just giggled cutely at everything and smiled. It was so frustrating.

 _Sure it's an amazing thing to learn her twisted love of horror…._ He could very easily add that to his document and examine it. It sounded like something very cool, and he praised himself for being the one to discover it, instead of Keroro. He bet Keroro didn't appreciate it nearly as much. _But...There are times when I want her scared! And she's not doing that!_

He glanced a little enviously around the theater. There were other girls there, clinging to their boyfriends or something along that line. That was the situation he had tried to bring about and had failed. _Just once I'd like you to be a little bit predictable._

But Mois wasn't. She was never predictable. That was why she was so frustrating. He, the smartest person he knew, a super genius of indescribable intellect, couldn't read her at all.

Why was one girl so confusing?

* * *

Once the movie was over, Kululu and Mois walked home. Mois kept trying to make conversations with him about various plot points, which was a little fun, but Kululu couldn't help feeling frustrated by her big smile.

 _I tried for over a month to get this to happen! And she wasn't scared._ He reasoned that was why he was annoyed. He failed at being a jerk to someone. Not the fact that she hadn't held his hand of course.

"Did you like it?" Angol Mois finally asked Kululu. "I mean I had a lot of fun!"

"Yeah, it was a satisfying experience." Kululu tried to be bland, passive about the whole thing.

Angol Mois frowned for a moment, as if she was thinking about something. "Did you mean the movie or spending time with me?"

"Both." Kululu said quickly. He didn't want to directly insult her, _Mois would cry if I said something like I didn't enjoy spending time with her._ But he couldn't say he had a great time. _She'd read too much into that. I'm sure she has an active imagination._

Satisfying was the most neutral of terms.

Mois smiled, and blushed a little, covering her mouth with her fist. "I had a satisfying time with you too, Kululu." She admitted.

Kululu's head spun. _What the frick does that mean? What does satisfying mean?_ He couldn't process having the same tactic done to him. Since he had tried to mean it in a neutral term did that mean Mois meant it in a neutral term? Or did she think he was saying he enjoyed it? And then she said in response that she enjoyed spending time with him?

Did it mean she was satisfied with him? That Keroro wasn't here? _Karma's a jerk._ He had no idea what satisfying meant. He needed to analyze this. Extremely. He was so confused…

"Your glasses are spinning, Kululu. Are you okay?" Angol Mois asked leaning down worriedly.

"Peachy." Kululu lied. He tried to walk quietly the rest of the way back, wondering what Mois really thought.

* * *

Kululu spent a long time revising and updating his Mois document.

 **Day 1854 of the Mois phenomenon**

 **Took subject labeled Mois to a movie in an attempt to repeat the experiment labeled 'close contact'. Experiment was a failure. Mois did not jump, nor was she scared. In fact she seems to enjoy gore and horror.**

 **Subject Mois described encounter as 'satisfying'. Various dictionaries describe satisfying as fulfilling. Could the experience be fulfilling in some way to Mois? Was she not getting that fulfillment in other relationships proving spending time with me was satisfying in a different way? Or was she being neutral. It is unclear but I intend to list a pros and cons list to analyze what satisfying means to Mois.**

Kululu was shaken away from his work by Giroro. The rest of the platoon had probably noticed his frustration. They remained unaware that Mois was unable to be shaken by anything.

Kululu noticed that he was venting a little more than necessary about his troubles with Giroro, probably due to his frustration at failing pulling a prank on Mois. He didn't care if Giroro knew that though, Giroro knew he was tenacious. He knew Mois would eventually be startled because of Kululu.

Kululu briefly wondered if Giroro was here because he wrongfully thought that Kululu had gone on a date with Mois. _The captain's putting some weird ideas into the easily impressionable heads of his platoon mates._ He wasn't even sure why Keroro thought that Mois liked him.

Most likely it was denial. He had probably begun to find out about Mois's feelings for him and couldn't process it or something. Keroro was very dense. Perhaps even shy. _He probably likes her but doesn't know how to handle it. Idiot. What kind of person can't process romantic feelings?_ Kululu thought to himself.

When Kululu complained about Keroro's theory, Giroro spoke. "Um...Well you did go on a date with her today." He pointed out.

Kululu glanced at him. Not because it was true, but because his fears had been confirmed that Giroro thought something weird. _Captain probably is spreading that myth. But just to be sure…._ "Is that what she said?" He tried to keep the interest out of his voice. Just normal curiosity. Unfortunately because of the quickness of his comment it sounded like he was desperate for information.

"Ummm...Not exactly. She shrugged when asked." Giroro replied.

Kululu's eyes widened and he started writing on his document.

 **Mois doesn't seem to know if we went on a date or not.** He wrote down.

He stared at it briefly for a minute. There was no intelligent way of putting that. It...It just...made him want to read the words again.

Mois didn't know if it was a date or not. That meant that there was a high chance that he had just gone on a date with Mois. After all, she wouldn't be unsure unless there was at least a small chance that was a date.

The idea of them dating, in her head at least, wasn't a 0% chance. And that, that was the most shocking news that Kululu had ever heard in his life.

"Hmm..." He said to himself. "That's interesting. I wasn't expecting that. Ku, ku, ku." He really wasn't expecting that at all.

 _I need to investigate this more._

Giroro said more none sense, implying something about him actually dating Mois. Kululu corrected him and Giroro then preceded to say more none sense as usual. Kululu had a good ear for both talking to Giroro and thinking to himself.

Giroro made one somewhat intelligent point though which was a miracle for Giroro. "She went on what she thought was a date with you….And she didn't know if it was a date." Giroro added that the idea that Mois liked him was less of a theory now.

Kululu thought for a second. "I'll investigate that matter on my own." He said mostly to himself.

But Giroro was right.

 _Geez, I thought the captain was just a blubbering idiot but...could there be a possibility that Mois…._ He couldn't even finish the thought.

It was some pretty damming evidence that she thought there was a possibility that they had gone on a date, and seemed extremely okay with that.

 _She does compliment me an awful lot too._ Kululu realized. He had thought she was just being nice, because Mois was that sort of person, but what if there was something more to it?

He really had thought that the idea, or even the theory of Mois having some sort of crush on anyone else but Keroro was physically impossible. But with the new fact that she was somewhat okay with the idea of going on a date with Kululu, that previous statement seemed false.

 _I need to figure this out._ This was new information, and new evidence he needed to analyze. And this was suddenly more pressing and more important than scaring Mois, or pulling any sort of jerky endeavor.

He sent Giroro out of his lab quickly saying something about Keroro's feelings or some crap, and turning back to his documents.

For some reason he couldn't seem to type anything from an observer's standpoint. He couldn't type anything with any neutrality.

 **Mois might like me.** _Might._ He reminded himself. She had shrugged. That was all. She herself didn't know if they had gone on a date. And he was reading way too much into that shrug.

 **I need to find out what she feels.** Might wasn't descriptive enough. Perhaps Keroro really was onto something.

 _They do spend a lot of time together. Maybe I was underestimating him. He does know a lot about Mois._ Kululu for once over-estimated Keroro's knowledge. _Perhaps he's seen something that she herself doesn't realize._

He really needed to figure this out. And an extremely guilty, part of his twisted mind knew which way he wanted Mois's feelings to lean.

And now there were two people overly determined to prove Mois was in love with Kululu. Keroro and Kululu himself.

* * *

 **Sorry again for not updating recently.**


	3. Second Sleepover

**Finally remembered to upload the third chapter. This sleepover stuff and writing other characters was pretty fun. I hoped I made Momoka's parts interesting.**

* * *

Keroro was more desperate than ever to convince everyone (and himself) that Angol Mois and Kululu were a thing.

Sure they didn't seem that into the idea, as of now. But eventually Giroro would learn that there was no reason to think that Angol Mois liked Keroro of all people!

 _Usually I'd be happy with the idea of being so popular._ Keroro loved people idolizing him, being fanatic over getting his attention. But being in love? That might be a tad bit awkward. And it took more commitment on his part than posing and flexing a muscle as the public adorned him with gifts.

Angol Mois especially didn't make any sense being in love with him. He couldn't stop thinking about the little girl he had babysat. _Nope. Nope. Nope! Giroro's just being gross._ And it was his duty as always to correct Giroro's grossness.

There was no possible way Angol Mois was in love with Keroro. There were like 0 signs. She was just a good nice girl who liked being helpful. And if convincing everybody that Mois was in love with Kululu or literally anyone else was the only way to clear their name and their relationship, Keroro would do it.

 _See Mois? I'm a good person too. I bet you wouldn't want people getting the weird idea that you like me!_

Somewhere Mois sneezed wondering why she was suddenly oddly annoyed.

* * *

Giroro tapped Dororo on the shoulder, so he could talk with him privately.

Dororo turned around quickly, having permanent tears in his eyes. He was just so happy to be included in this whole thing! Although there was some degree of pity pooling in him about Keroro thinking Mois liked Kululu, he was just happy that he was in on the gossip.

"We need to talk about this whole Mois thing. And Keroro." Giroro told him.

"You're talking to me?" Dororo gasped. "Yes! Yes I want to talk."

Giroro sighed. Dororo was a little over dramatic about someone talking to him sometime. "I don't think Mois likes Kululu."

"Well obviously." Dororo chuckled. "I'm not an idiot. I'm just trying to help Keroro see that. It won't benefit anyone for him to be rushed into anything. If he just suddenly is pushed into the idea of Mois liking him, he'll probably freak out. Keroro's bad with this sort of stuff."

Giroro nodded. "But that's the thing." He said, "Keroro's bad at this sort of stuff, dense sure, but he's never been one for delusion. Especially to this level. Kululu pointed out that something might be up, and I...I agree." Giroro nodded curtly.

"What's happening then?" Dororo paused. Keroro had certainly been dense before but Giroro was right that he had never been in such a state of refusal to see the truth. A case could be made maybe that he was that way for Tamama, but Dororo knew he was just extremely dense in that case.

"I think he might like Mois himself. He just...Doesn't really know it yet I don't think. He's way too focused and dedicated to this relationship." Giroro explained.

"He doesn't seem jealous though." Dororo pointed out.

"Well that's because it hasn't been proven. But he's so dense and he just...can't believe that she likes him I don't think. I don't think he's ready to confront his own feelings on her." Giroro pointed out. "That's what we're here for. To help him realize he's actually got a thing for her."

Dororo nodded. "I'm all for helping someone, and creating love." He was on board for this. "So we continue aiding Keroro to get a chance to show him the truth?"

Giroro nodded, and stuck out his hand. He and Dororo shook hands on it.

They had a goal now. Help Keroro and Mois get together. It was a relationship that they knew would eventually happen, it was just because of Keroro's own flaws he was pushing it away.

 _Don't worry Keroro. We'll get through your thick skull._ Giroro vowed.

* * *

Keroro struck a pose in front of Giroro and Dororo. "I have an idea!"

"On how you're going to prove their love? All of your other ideas were pretty bad." Giroro reminded. "Except for the one of outright lying to Mois. But that's because she's extremely gullible."

"We'll have a sleepover with Mois!" Keroro proclaimed, "Sleepovers help people confess their innermost feelings. People lie on sleeping boys and talk about boys! That sort of thing!" Keroro grinned.

Giroro looked extremely confused. "And….Did you get this idea from personal experience or the TV?"

"A little of both." Keroro shrugged. "Pekoponian sleepovers are very weird. But you can't say it's not true! I mean we didn't talk about boys in our sleepover but we did talk about relationships. Dororo confessed to us his innermost feelings for Koyuki."

"I did not!" Dororo insisted blushing. "I outright denied things!"

"Uh-huh. Denied things a little too much." Keroro shrugged. "And Tamama told me that pekoponians talk about boys during their sleepovers. It makes sense that he learned that, he and Momoka have a lot of sleepovers after all."

"...Yeah-"

"And he always wants to talk about which boys are hottest when I'm having a sleepover with him. So it must just be a cultural thing. But it's totally normal. And Mois could quite easily talk about boys in a sleepover!" Keroro joyfully proclaimed.

Giroro sighed. What kind of weird things was Tamama teaching Keroro? He really didn't want to ask. He assumed immediately that Tamama's plans had turned into a talk about Gundam though and the protagonists in it.

"Won't she think it's a little weird that we're having a sleepover with her though?" Giroro asked, imaging himself draped over a pink and frilly pillow. "I mean...I think we won't really be able to talk about boys with her very easily."

Keroro blinked. He did not understand. Why couldn't they talk about boys?

"Yes. She might be too embarrassed to talk to Keroro." Dororo agreed, "Directly at least. Don't you think this plan would go better if she went to a sleepover with girls?"

"...Do I need my wig?" Keroro asked.

Dororo sighed. "Why don't you just ask Natsumi to have a sleepover with her? I'm sure Mois would be overjoyed to spend some more time with Natsumi, Momoka and Koyuki. Just tell Natsumi the truth that you want to know what Mois thinks of boys."

"Natsumi would never ever help Keroro-" Giroro huffed.

Dororo tapped him on the shoulder. "I think she would if she knew Keroro wanted to know Mois's opinion on males. She might tease him a bit but she'd be very willing to help on that front."

Giroro's eyes widened. Dororo was right! Natsumi was a good person after all. And she didn't outright hate Keroro. And she definitely cared about Mois and wanted her to be happy with Keroro, even if the relationship was a little weird to her.

 _Oh! And she might learn more about out-of-species relationships too!_ Perhaps Mois could even help Natsumi's own understanding of things. Maybe Natsumi would talk about him…

Giroro started drooling. "N-natsumi..."

"Giroro?" Keroro asked.

"Yeah. Asking Natsumi's help sounds like a great plan. Let's do...this sleepover operation." Giroro continued to be in fantasy land.

He liked this.

* * *

It was easy enough to convince Natsumi to invite her female friends. And she was actually quite kind to Keroro about the whole ordeal although she had a bit of a smirk on her face, oddly enough.

She very easily organized it.

Keroro walked back to his room wondering how exactly they would find out what Mois said during this sleepover. Not the most well thought out plan.

"Trust Natsumi to get the information you're looking for? I thought you wouldn't trust a pekoponian."

Keroro heard a voice down a long shadow.

"K-kululu?" Keroro realized peering down the hallway as Kululu loomed in the shadows.

"Ku, ku, ku." Kululu laughed.

"W-wait...You heard mine and Giroro's conversation?" Keroro sweated. Kululu knew that he was trying to get information about him and Mois? And that he was trying to expose Mois's secret crush?

 _Of course he knows. You lied to him directly about Mois having a crush on him._ He wasn't the best at hiding what he was doing.

He was more scared of what Kululu would do to him now that he knew Keroro was messing with his personal life.

"Sure did, something about organizing a sleepover to get information out of Mois, yadda, yadda, yadda, figure out what she thinks about boys which you have no idea how badly is going to backfire, stuff like that." Kululu mocked, leaning against the wall.

"It won't backfire!" Keroro insisted. "Girls talk a lot about boys in pekoponian sleepovers!"

Kululu rolled his eyes under his glasses. "Want me to tell you how you'll fail?"

Keroro didn't.

"First, you can't trust Natsumi, she's a pekoponian, our enemy, so she'll definitely fail at whatever you set her up to do." Kululu persuaded.

Keroro could agree about that.

"Second you forgot to mention the most important part to her! That you wanted her to be getting information about me. So Natsumi's probably gotten confused and will try to get information from Mois about how she feels towards you. Because you were the one to ask her for this stuff. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu pointed out.

Keroro gasped. He was right. "But...But Natsumi knows Mois doesn't like me!"

Kululu tried desperately not to laugh. He failed. "Mmm...Afraid not. She thinks that Mois likes you too."

"I knew idiots flocked together. She is a lot like Giroro and Giroro thinks that." Keroro realized. "Oh no..." He moaned. "You're right! This is going to fail."

"Ku, ku, ku. And that's why I'm here to help. Don't worry!" Kululu reassured him in a fake cheery tone.

Keroro's eyes widened. "You're...Here to help me?" Oddly enough he didn't trust that at all. Especially since he was meddling in Kululu's life directly.

He felt like Kululu had some sort of evil plan. Or was mocking him. Honestly Kululu offering help was the biggest clue that Mois might like him. But he felt a shiver run up his spine.

"Yep. You can only trust yourself after all. You agree with that statement, correct? Ku, ku, ku." Kululu pulled some sort of machine that he had wheeled up.

Keroro recognized it as the body swapper. He had used it on Natsumi once after all.

Keroro narrowed his eyes. "What are you suggesting?"

"Oh nothing. Just that I'll be away from this machine for the rest of the day. If say someone wanted to switch with Natsumi...Impersonate her or something….That would be pretty funny. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu grinned.

Keroro's eyes widened. It was a smart plan. Then he'd be able to learn what Mois said, and be able to deal with it all himself. He walked towards the machine. "Wait a minute...Why are you helping me? Are you like...Going to tell Giroro or something and sic him on me? Or is this a scheme to get me to learn Mois doesn't like you."

Kululu shrugged. "I'm just an agent of chaos, baby. No other great reason." Really he wanted to know what Mois thought to. And Keroro's plan really had been running towards backfiring. It wasn't like he could switch bodies with anyone himself too. He unfortunately had a large tell of shivering once Mois looked at him. It would be too obvious.

Keroro narrowed his eyes, but nodded as Kululu walked away. _Maybe he wants to know too?_ It didn't look like Kululu was going to destroy him today. Maybe this was more proof towards his theory.

He smiled. Maybe Kululu was an idiot platoon member too when it came to love! _And that's why I'm the best captain ever, exposing all this!_

* * *

Kululu had lied of course. He did have some ulterior motive, and he had planned to sic Giroro on Keroro.

"WHAT!?" Giroro shouted when Kululu called him to his lab.

"He switched places with Natsumi. She's tied up in Keroro's body in the storage closet." Kululu explained. "I won't tell you which one though. Ku, ku, ku."

"W-why…? It was going so well..? Why did Keroro decide to be evil?" Giroro asked, his fists shaking in rage at Keroro stealing Natsumi's body.

Kululu shrugged. "Beats me. Something about a sleepover? I don't know." He played dumb.

He saw Giroro turn towards the door.

"Going to save your warrior princess? Ku, ku, ku." Kululu asked. "I'll give you a hint, it's not closet number 1-"

"I could find her easily, Kululu, you and I both know that. But at the present moment I'm more concerned about what happens to her physical body. Natsumi I think would agree. After all the last time Keroro stole her body, he took a bath and took off her bra because he didn't understand it." Giroro sighed. "I have to protect Natsumi's virtue and make sure he doesn't do it again."

"...Oh?" Kululu hadn't expected that. "How do you suggest that?"

"I'll switch bodies too and infiltrate the sleepover!" Giroro proclaimed. "Tell me where the machine is."

"End of the hallway. Who's body are you taking for a spin?" Kululu asked curiously. "I'm not quite sure the machine works on Mois so please don't break my tech by trying-" He quickly added a comment so they could continue questioning Mois.

"I'll use Koyuki." Giroro smiled. That way she couldn't be all cuddly with Natsumi.

He hurried off.

And once the body swapping was done, Kululu dragging the real Koyuki to a closet and threw her in with the real Natsumi along with a deck of cards.

"Want to just...hang out I guess?" Natsumi asked, and sighed. "I mean I would be more mad but I've never seen the stupid frog so dedicated to learning something about Mois. Also I'm just kinda used to this nonsense at this point."

"Yeah!" Koyuki agreed. "And I'm so happy to be able to play cards with you. This is more fun than a sleepover. And I'm sure Momoka and Mois will join us soon when they get body swapped." She predicted.

Natsumi raised a brow. "Wait...I understand the stupid frog stealing my body, but why are you here Koyuki?"

"Giroro." Koyuki replied.

"Ah." Natsumi nodded. There was not much else to say. Giroro was a little odd sometimes. And was prone to getting swept up in the stupid frog's schemes. She was barely surprised.

* * *

Momoka sat in the floor with what she thought was Natsumi, Koyuki and Mois. She was very confused. "Did...Koyuki just get dragged off after being blow darted?"

"Tee hee! I'm right here!" Koyuki/Giroro giggled. "None of that happened, silly!" Giroro wasn't the best at acting as Koyuki. _What does she even act like? Ninja? Obsessed with Natsumi? Girl? I'll get it eventually._

Momoka stared at her completely confused. "You saw that too, right?" She asked.

"I was on my phone." Mois admitted. "Have you heard of the game tetris? Pekopon really does have some amazing things, doesn't it?" Angol Mois's eyes were wide. "Oooh! New high score! Momoka...Momoka...Does your world have other phone games?" She poked her.

"Eh. I couldn't be bothered by something that's not me." Natsumi/Keroro shrugged.

Momoka just stared blankly. Maybe she had imagined it. She was very confused.

"Anyway, as I was saying, let's do the thing that's in all pe-" Natsumi spoke but Koyuki abruptly glared at her. "Human sleepovers." Natsumi/Keroro explained saying the word human in a very alien way.

Momoka raised her eyebrow.

"Ooh and what's in those, Natsumi?" Angol Mois asked. "You've been to lots of sleepovers, right? So you must know what's in a normal pekoponian one."

"You've never been to a sleepover, Mois?" Momoka asked.

Mois thought for a moment. "I've slept a lot in various places near various people. I think that counts. I joined some of Tamama's and Uncle's sleepovers but I just kinda fell asleep on Uncle. And then I slept at work..."

Momoka felt a wave of pity for Tamama.

"I've been to sleepovers in my ninja village! Tee hee! I sleep in the trees!" Giroro tried to act like what he thought Koyuki would.

Keroro one of Natsumi's hands to stop the weird conversation. "I meant we should gossip. Like about boys and stuff. And what do you think of them. Like do you know any especially cute ones?"

Giroro/Koyuki smiled despite himself. _Ah. He really is into Mois. Fishing for information._

Momoka immediately blushed forgetting about the weirdness. "W-well, Fuyuki was very cute today. He forgot to brush his hair and there were two strands sticking up and-"

Keroro cut her off. "What about you la- Mois?" He corrected himself. "Do you know any cute boys?"

"Tamama calls himself cute!" Mois smiled, "I don't know if I especially believe it though. But...He's certainly nice. But...I'm not sure what kind of person calls themselves cute."

"No! I mean who do you think is cute? In like...a hot term? Who do you like the looks of?" Keroro tried to prod a little more. "Like...Uhh...Momoka's in love with Fuyuki. She thinks he's cute."

Momoka blushed deeply. "Natsumi!"

"And Koyuki, Koyuki she really likes guys like-" Keroro glanced at Koyuki.

"Dororo." Giroro lied. That's something Koyuki would say, right?

"Wow! Dororo will be really happy to learn that!" Keroro smiled. Mois clapped.

"Yeah! I had no idea you liked Dororo, Koyuki." Angol Mois smiled. "I think he likes you a lot too."

Giroro felt guilt welling in his stomach when he realized Keroro didn't know the real Koyuki wasn't here. _CRAP! We forgot to invite Dororo to impersonate someone too!_ Dororo would cry over that. And now he'd have the false idea that Koyuki liked him.

He hoped they wouldn't focus on this. "Yeah, but um...It's no big deal!" Giroro said quickly. "We're just looking for something like that."

"Well then I like Uncle! I really really love Uncle!" Angol Mois proclaimed.

Keroro in Natsumi's body sighed. "No, we don't mean as a family member. We mean who do you like...want to kiss."

"Uncle!" Mois repeated again.

Keroro groaned. "Not on the cheek! Like on the lips!"

"Uncle. I'm not sure why you aren't understanding this, Natsumi. I think I'm being very up front." Angol Mois frowned.

Keroro moaned again because he believed Mois was confused.

Giroro snickered a bit. He couldn't help it. It was really funny to see Keroro being dense.

"...Um- Uhh, Natsumi?" Momoka saw that Natsumi looked annoyed, "If you want a more in depth conversation we could like explain what we like in a guy's looks and stuff like that. Like..How what I love most in Fuyuki is his strong biceps-" She sighed.

Everybody sputtered. Fuyuki didn't have those! But they couldn't tell Momoka that.

"Yeah! That sounds fun!" Angol Mois nodded. "I like Uncle's eyebrows best and how tall he is! He's like extremely tall."

"What is with you both naming things that just don't exist?" Giroro groaned. "Can you two ground yourself in reality at all?" He said gruffly.

They both stared at him. That wasn't very Koyuki like to say.

"Uhhh! I like Dororo's mouth. Which I, Koyuki, have been the only one to ever see. It's indescribable. Tee hee." Giroro faked. "What about you….Natsumi?" He growled a bit, glaring at the body snatcher next to him.

Keroro stared at him. "Oh uhh...I'm straight." He said very quickly. A little too quickly.

"We know that Natsumi." Momoka smiled, "That's why we're asking you what you like about a male's attributes."

"I don't like boys. At all." Keroro insisted.

"Natsumi that's a little...conflicted." Mois frowned. "But it's all right! We won't push you."

Giroro sighed. "We're at a sleepover where we're talking about males. Remember? Now...Think what would you say, you know, Natsumi? What would you, a teenage girl, say?" He tried to remind Keroro that he wasn't answering for himself.

Keroro still seemed confused. "Uhh well I guess you know Tamama's got some n-nice attributes and all-"

Mois gasped. "You think Tamama is pretty? Poor Giroro." She said aloud.

Momoka nodded. "Maybe she just means in a normal cute sense? But then...why did she immediately name a frog...I've gotta agree, poor Giroro."

Both Momoka and Mois cried for Giroro's sake. That annoyed Giroro more than focusing on Keroro's answer. "H-hey! Let's...Let's not pity Giroro here? I mean uhh he's strong! He doesn't need your tears."

"But...Natsumi likes Tamama's looks more than Giroro's..." Mois tearfully shed. "Don't you feel sorry for him at all, Koyuki?"

 _I would if that was the real Natsumi._ Giroro thought to himself. He put his hand on 'Natsumi's shoulder' "Stop saying weird things, Natsumi. People are going to get weird ideas of you. And I won't allow anyone to get any weird ideas of Natsumi." He glared at Keroro.

Keroro realized that what was in front of him was not Koyuki but Giroro. The tiny gun in her hand was kind of a give away. And he started sweating. "Umm! My bad! I got confused! Saburo's pretty. Love that hair."

Giroro glared more.

"That is the right idea though! It's the truth!" Keroro sweated more. "I mean Giroro. Giroro's cute. He's got that scar."

The gun went away. Keroro breathed a sigh of relief.

Koyuki sat down happily.

"Umm...Uhh now let's not focus on who I think is pretty." Keroro said quickly. "How about we name one important attribute that we want in a partner? I'll start uhh..." Keroro tried to think of something for Natsumi. "Good looks."

"Kindness!" Momoka easily said.

"Oooh I like that too kindness!" Mois agreed.

Keroro frowned. Well, that definitely wasn't like Kululu.

"UTTER BATTLE STRENGTH." Giroro shouted way too eagerly.

"...Well that doesn't sound much like Dororo." Momoka frowned. "I didn't know you were so bloodthirsty, Koyuki."

Keroro continued frowning as the people talked around him. "How about we name a...uhh second attribute?" He'd just go down the list until Mois said something resembling Kululu.

"Strong moral code." Giroro blushed.

"Exploration!" Momoka smiled.

"Creativity." Mois spouted out.

Keroro smiled! Creativity! That was definitely Kululu.

"Oh!" Momoka looked surprised. "That doesn't sound very much like Keroro. He's not a very creative person."

Keroro's smile dropped. "He is too!" He insisted too ready to defend himself.

Angol Mois shook her head. "Creativity is very much one of Uncle's strong suits! It takes a very creative person to paint a gundam model and shop online for a good deal on Gundam!" She defended.

"Yeah!" Keroro agreed. "Wait...You mean you like creativity if it's...creative like that?" He was hoping she hadn't been thinking of him when she said that.

"...Keroro is not creative." Giroro told her.

"But he makes so many invasion plans!" Mois reminded. "Okay most of them are a little teeny dumb, but that takes creative effort!"

Giroro just shook his head. "Not creative in the least bit."

Keroro grimaced. He was about to insult himself and it was going to hurt. _You're Natsumi right now. You can do it._ "Yeah, umm..the stupid frog doesn't really do much creative. He just sits around on his butt all day. I mean the most creative person I can think of, if you like creative people, is someone like Kululu."

Momoka frowned. "Well..I suppose Kululu could be defined as creative. If you want to be nice. It does take a lot of creativity to make those nasty inventions, and plan out how to be the biggest jerk one possibly can on a daily basis." She shivered. "Did I tell you he put mustaches on all my Fuyuki pictures one day? It was awful. Fuyuki looks awful with a handlebar mustache."

Angol Mois frowned. "Well, yeah, Kululu is super creative. That's obvious." She agreed. She thought for a moment. "But if I was comparing Kululu and Uncle I'd never be able to think of anything super great about Uncle. I mean I'd be here all day!" She crossed her arms, "You could say, optimisim in gundam?"

Giroro/Koyuki's jaw dropped. Did she seriously say something good about Kululu? Or was she just insulting Keroro? "Um..Uhh what do you mean by that."

"I just mean that Kululu is super smart, and super creative and he's got a ton of really good qualities like that. It's not fair to Uncle to compare the two of them. I mean...If I tried to compare Uncle's gundam creating and Kululu's inventions, Uncle wouldn't really have a logical chance in a match of handiness would he?" Angol Mois pointed out trying to be logical about her statement.

"No..He wouldn't." Giroro agreed. "I just...I didn't think you'd have any logical reasoning like that. I kinda thought you were a bit Uncle obsessed and couldn't...really see that he wasn't the greatest ever." Maybe she was a little less delusioned than he thought.

Angol Mois clapped. "I didn't mean to imply he wasn't the best ever! He is! I just...I think Kululu does a lot of cool things and he deserves credit. He works hard."

Keroro tried to nod, he didn't really believe that. Some people were just super good at things with barely any effort. Kululu was one of those infuriating people. "I'm surprised you think he does anything good. I mean he's a huge jerk. But you can't possibly be nice enough not to see that?"

Angol Mois was silent. "He's a little bit of a jerk. But I think he's kind too! Sometimes! I just don't think you've had the opportunity to see a nicer version of Kululu!"

"And you have?" Giroro said sarcastically.

"Yeah! He's always offering to do things for me, or give me something." Angol Mois proclaimed proudly. "He says 'Please. Please, I beg of you, I'll do anything if you stop looking at me-"." Mois paused. "Wait...Was he saying all those nice things because he was afraid of me?" She gasped. "Oh! I thought he just liked to give me gifts. I guess...I don't react well to bribes because I didn't leave." She frowned.

"See? He isn't a nicer version." Giroro pointed out. "Just more scared."

"But he's always worrying about me too. Asking me if I get enough to eat and stuff, or if Uncle's been overworking me and if I've slept enough. I really appreciate that sort of responsible kindness. I mean Uncle's kind but...Not exactly in the responsible way." Angol Mois admitted.

Keroro squeaked. He hadn't ever asked those questions. And now he felt a little bad. "Uhh I don't think he overworks you-"

"Oh he doesn't! Kululu just asks." Angol Mois added. "That's why I think he's a nice person."

"Yeah! But he's a huge jerk!" Giroro reminded. "I mean you must know this, he even tried to take you to a horror movie- I mean I heard from uhhh...Someone? Dororo, yeah, that he tried to scare you."

Angol Mois shrugged. "He likes to prank. And I wasn't scared so it's all right!" She smiled innocently. "And yeah he's a bit of a jerk, but it's cute in a way isn't it?"

Momoka sputtered. Keroro smiled and glanced at Giroro. Giroro's jaw dropped open.

"She was just being nice." Giroro whispered.

She didn't deny this.

"And...Umm...What do you think of Kululu overall?" Keroro asked, hoping she'd confess her innermost feelings?

"He's a good person. I like spending time with him. It's nice." Mois smiled, not seeing anything sinister about this sort of question. "Kululu's cool."

"But everybody's cool, right?" Giroro said quickly because he knew Mois didn't know that Keroro was going to take this as proof.

"Sure." Mois agreed.

Keroro frowned, but some of this was good stuff.

The sleepover continued as one could easily predict. Giroro eventually restrained Keroro when he suggested throwing all of Natsumi's undergarments in a pile and making underwear angels like in the snow.

Momoka just watched the weirdness unfold, completely and utterly confused.

* * *

Kululu had of course watched the sleepover. He was pleased and had taken overly careful notes. But a lot of the facts pointed to Mois's answers toward him just being overly nice, and her kindness.

She was incredibly innocent after all. Of course she'd think he was nice, creative and that sort of thing. That didn't mean anything.

And he was her friend, of course she'd say nice things about him.

 _Wait...Are we friends?_ Kululu realized. She probably called everybody her friend, but he didn't actually know for sure if she thought they were friends. He had never called her his friend, after all. He didn't call anyone his friend. Not even Saburo.

He called Dansu Masu his buddy but that guy was a riot.

 _If...If we aren't friends of course she probably thought I was asking her out when we hung out. It wouldn't be a normal hang out session._ That would make the whole situation lean more towards a date.

But at the same time could he really reasonably say that there was a chance that she had feelings for him if she didn't even consider him her friend? She thought everybody was her friend. She must have really disliked him if he wasn't her friend.

 _Does Mois think we're friends?_ He couldn't really figure out any reason for or against her thinking that they were friends. He couldn't come up with anything on the spot.

After all, he could have a million clues but only Mois herself could know what she was thinking. He never could figure out what was going through her mind.

If she did think they were friends...Well then he felt a tiny bit bad about his whole document of observation on her. Not enough to stop it of course, because he still wanted to understand her, but still a tiny bit bad.

Kululu hadn't ever thought he would ask himself the question of whether he and Mois were friends.

* * *

 _I know that I can only get that information from Mois. Whether or not we're friends._ That meant he had to try to get the answer out of her.

And something about walking up to someone and asking if you were their friend seemed lame, and extremely hard to perfect.

There was the option of trying to fish the answers out of her. He had tried to figure out a convoluted plot during that night of how he could get her to purposefully show her friendship by putting himself in dangerous situations to see if she was concerned or not. And he did put that idea in the mental idea bin labeled 'how to get a reaction out of Mois'.

But that plan sounded long, and rather painful. _Seems like she might misunderstand things too. Might just think I'm clumsy._ He told himself. He was always up for the pain, but if she did show concern then she'd look at him with those big beautiful eyes of hers.

And Kululu wasn't up for that sort of pain. That would be too much.

So he decided that he'd have to go the direct route, the one he didn't want to do.

 **If Mois gives a yes concerning our friendship it means that there is a chance she could like me.**

 **If Mois gives a no it means there is a chance that she went on a date with me.**

Kululu wrote down. He frowned. That was basically the same answer. _Dang. Am I putting biased wording in this document?_ This was supposed to be scientific, completely unbiased.

He scrolled through the very biased document. And frowned.

 **If Mois does not think we're friends when everybody else is her friend, likely she has no positive feelings towards my existence.** Kululu tried to write a more unbiased no.

 **A no does not indicate we went on a date. Neither does a yes. The answer will just indicate the minimum of affection she has for me.**

Kululu nodded that seemed to make sense. Before he could investigate any sort of potential feelings he had to figure out where he was starting out from. And under inspection it turned out he didn't know that baseline.

He wondered, how and when he could word this into a conversation. _"Are we friends"_ Seemed like the easiest way.

But the problem with Mois is she made everything harder by just existing.

* * *

Kululu elected to not exactly put himself in dangerous situations, but bad ones, to get her to show her concern. Anything was easier than just asking her.

When they were working together, he would spill hot tea on himself. "Oops! My bad! Ku, ku, ku. Wow. That...burns a little bit."

"...Oh no! Kululu...Are you okay?" Angol Mois would ask attentively. "Here let me get a towel or something." She would offer.

And Kululu would feel frustrated. _She's concerned! But she's always concerned! She's just a nice person!_

As Angol Mois would run off to get a towel, Kululu would jot down his notes, while burning slightly.

 **Subject Mois is attentive and kind as usual. But she always is. There is nothing unusual about her reactions.** Perhaps he hadn't thought things through.

He tried to up the antics by giving himself paper cuts or tripping when he tried to get off his chair, or things like that.

But she never acted any differently than he expected. She was always kind and showed full concern. And in no way did it help him figure out if they were friends.

"Kululu..." After the seventh time Kululu had tripped Mois was onto the fact that something was going on.

Either he had been hit with one of his own rayguns and had become clumsy because of it, or he wanted her to think something and be off guard for a prank.

She wasn't going to call him out on that though. She was just very concerned to the degree he would injure himself for a prank.

"Are you trying to get my attention?" She teased, trying to get him to notice that he was being extremely clumsy and she had noticed.

Instead of coming clean about the prank he was planning, Kululu did something unusual and turned pink. "N-no!" He said quickly. "W-why would you think that? Never mind. Don't answer that!" He said immediately.

He put some special tape on his finger that he had invented that got rid of paper cuts.

Angol Mois stared at him. So he was trying to get her attention? _Wait...He is trying to get my attention?_ She blushed. Maybe...Maybe Keroro hadn't been lying that much. He did point out the fact that Kululu might want to date her.

She still wasn't too sure if he had asked her on a date or not. And if they had gone out on a so called date. But him wanting her attention definitely made sense in that context.

"Um...You've been awfully quiet." Kululu addressed. Apparently she had been spacing out for a full couple minutes. "Is there something you want to say?"

"No!" Angol Mois shook her head quickly. For some reason she couldn't glance at Kululu right now.

"Oh. Well...Um...Uhh...There is...uhh something I want to ask." For some reason Kululu was being extremely stuttery.

It was hard for him to focus. And his voice was quieter than it was usually.

 _What is it he wants to ask?_ Angol Mois wondered and glanced at him.

"Are..A-are we...Y-you know that sort of r-relationship..." Kululu tried to just spit out and ask it. But once he looked at Angol Mois and how interested she was in his question he started getting nervous.

 _Dang it! Her eyes are scaring me again._ He realized. "Um—What I mean to s-say is, d-do you like...A-are we close, I mean, well you know what I think of you Mois and I'm wondering what you think of me-" Kululu put a hand on his face. He couldn't do this when she was staring at him. "Wait, let me start over. I'm rambling."

Mois smiled a little bit. "It's okay! You can do it!" She said encouragingly.

That didn't help him. "Are w-we-" He frowned. The words weren't coming out. Maybe he could show her what he was saying with his hands?

He tried to make some sort of symbol for friends with his hands. He just put his two fingers together to make them entwined so she would understand what he was saying.

Mois hadn't understood anything of what he was saying in the beginning. But seeing how flustered Kululu was getting, which was unusual in itself, and how much he seemed to be highlighting their relationship in his statement, along with entwining his fingers, Mois had some idea. _Omg. He's confessing to me. Omg._

Keroro had been right this whole time! Kululu really did like her! He hadn't been lying.

After all, who would get so embarrassed over asking a normal question. It had to be something big. He had to be trying to say his feelings.

And Mois didn't know how to react to that. She covered her face a little, immediately blushing. "Um..Uhh...Well, we're whatever you want to be, Kululu!" She tried to keep herself saying something optimistic and encouraging.

But she realized that wasn't exactly what Kululu wanted to hear when he frowned. "That's...Not really an answer."

 _Oh of course it isn't. I wouldn't want to hear that either if I was putting my entire feelings on the line too._ She had never...really thought she would be in this situation with Kululu.

But somehow the idea of Kululu confessing to her wasn't a bad one. In fact she was smiling a lot under her hand. Kululu could probably tell too.

He could probably tell that she was getting really embarrassed in fact. "Um...Well, w-why don't you finish your question?" She nodded. "That way I can try to answer you perfectly."

Kululu winced. Did he have to? "But you understand what I'm asking, right?" He asked hopefully. Maybe there was a way he could get out of asking if they were friends.

"Y-yeah." Angol Mois nodded turning pinker. "I mean how could I not?"

Kululu nodded. She was very good at reading social cues to his knowledge. "Then why do I have to finish it?"

"Because...I want to hear it from you..." Angol Mois whispered a little, blushing and hiding her face even more.

Kululu didn't really understand that embarrassed reaction. _If she gets embarrassed by this cheesy friendship stuff I'm going to have to add that to my document._ He blushed a little too though. Why did she have to be so direct in the fact that she wanted to hear from him that they were friends?

If...If she said that they weren't friends after all this he'd be humiliated. Especially since him asking this was kind of implying that they were friends.

"A-are...Are we friends?" Kululu finally asked, looking up at Angol Mois.

She withdrew her hand from her mouth. "Huh?" She just stared at him blankly.

And that was exactly the answer he didn't want. "N-never mind. Just forget I said anything."

Mois's eyes widened realizing instantly that she had hurt Kululu's feelings. "I wasn't saying we weren't friends! I...I just didn't realize that was what you wanted to say!" She waved her hands frantically.

Kululu's eyes widened. "You didn't? I thought you said you knew what I was saying."

"It….It seemed like uhh something else." Angol Mois blushed a little and hid eye contact. Really only Kululu was this embarrassed about being friends. It wasn't that surprising.

Kululu was a little curious by what she thought he meant. _I'll have to rewatch this conversation and try to figure that out. She seemed quite embarrassed after all. But what else could I mean but friendship?_ He didn't know. Rewatching this embarrassing conversation seemed like a very hard task.

"...You seem disappointed." He noted. Was that because it wasn't what she thought it was or because Kululu was asking her about their relationship?

"I'm not." She insisted quickly. She glanced at Kululu. "I really am not. Don't worry." She seemed to know that Kululu's mind might have been racing to insecurity.

He hated that. "Tch." He hated how she could read him.

"We are friends." She smiled.

And with those words, she sort of eased his worries. He wasn't sure why he felt relieved.

 _Mois can create a feeling of relief after...stress? She creates stress and then relieves it. Confusing creature._ Kululu told himself.

"I'm sorry if I ever didn't give you the impression that I wasn't your friend. But we are friends. Very close ones at that. I value you deeply as my friend." Mois said very tenderly in that all too sweet way.

Kululu hated that. Kululu hated this. But Kululu didn't exactly hate this too. He had the answer he wanted.

He smiled to himself. Now the investigation on her feelings could precede smoothly. He could reanalyze her sleepover answers as something not just nice, but truthful.

It didn't exactly answer if they were dating or not, but it was a start to where their relationship was.

 **Subject Mois seems to have developed a friendship with me (the observer of this document) that does not make her any less frustrating and confusing though.**

Kululu wrote in his document later.

But there was a part of him that was thinking something very different. ... _Mois and I are friends!_

He silenced that happy part. It wasn't relevant to this search.

But he did allow himself to smile every now and then.

Mois on the other hand just felt incredibly embarrassed that she had thought Kululu was confessing. _Who gets that flustered by asking someone if they're friends?_ She had to ask herself.

Kululu was a funny guy.

* * *

 **Every now and then I really really want to write a kurumois story that also focuses on the Keroro part of Mois's character. I like the way sgt frog handles love triangles in a funny way (opposed to like young adult novels) and I do kinda like writing them. However it's hard to write it kinda love triangley when I write Keroro extremely gay in every story. So I guess I'm kinda trying to write this love triangle from Giroro's point of view? It's not really one, but he sure thinks it is.**

 **Anyway I hope the Keroro and Mois parts are not like cringey to read or just generally not a fun time like some love triangles. I hope it's just kinda funny.**

 **Please review!**


	4. Scientific Only

Kululu still wasn't exactly sure where Mois stood on the whole date thing. It still seemed to be very neutral ground. And despite Keroro's delusion and insistence that they were dating he hadn't turned up any good evidence on that end.

 _Ku, ku, ku. I guess if you want something done right you've gotta do it himself._ He shrugged.

First he had to determine how dense Mois was. If Mois was extremely dense, like Keroro level dense, and knew it, there was a huge chance that she could just have some sort of feelings for Kululu and just not know it. And that would have led her confusion on if they went on a date or not.

 _But...The real question is how do you figure out if someone is THAT dense?_ Usually they just showed it themselves by saying something stupid.

And Mois did say plenty stupid things, such as his favorite line "Tamama and Uncle are such good friends!" and so forth. But did that meant she was dense about things happening to herself?

 **If someone was hopelessly in love with Mois would she notice? My database leads to no conclusion that she would or would notice.** Kululu wrote down.

Nobody had really acted into Mois, that he knew of. Besides what Kululu saw as obvious jealousy and paranoia by Keroro, Keroro was mostly indifferent at best towards Mois, romantically.

And there really was nobody else who had tried to flirt with her. Not that Kululu knew of at least.

 _...That can't be right though. I know she's a pretty girl._ Someone had to have flirted with her at one point. And Kululu was a little irked that he didn't have that information to draw on. He made a mental look to look more that.

The facts remained that Kululu knew of no one that was hopelessly in love with Angol Mois though.

 **Trust me, if someone was hopelessly in love with Mois, I'd know.** He knew a lot after all.

So the duty fell to him, to determine if she even could recognize if someone had feelings for her, or heck, if she was in a romantic setting. Kululu briefly wondered how he could do this test. Set up Keroro and Mois for a moment?

 _No she has an active imagination for that guy._ He reminded himself. She wouldn't be dense in that situation, correct?

That...and setting them up on a date might destroy his end goal, of trying to figure out if Mois had feelings for him of all people. She definitely would have moved more towards the team of 'Kululu and I just hung out'.

 _Hmm...I got it._ Kululu decided. _I'll just go on a date with her. A real one. If she can't figure out that's a date it might mean the previous instance was a date too._

It might have been a little bit of a counter-intuitive plan. Figure out if he had gone on a date with Mois by going on an actual date with Mois. But Kululu thought it was genius, verses being terribly flawed.

 **I have decided to go on a date that is clearly romantic with Mois, for scientific purposes only.** He proclaimed to his notes. **This is the only way to determine Mois's level of denseness.** He smirked to himself.

How smart he was! This was a fool proof plan of observation.

 _Hm...If the captain finds out that we'll be going on a date he might get more obsessed with the idea that we're together._ Kululu reminded himself briefly.

Honestly though? He didn't care. He was doing this for scientific purposes. It didn't really matter what Keroro thought. Sure if he had some actual logical backing on his claim he might realize how jealous he was, but that was something to deal with later.

He didn't really want to think about Keroro and Mois's relationship in the long term

 _Now...I've gotta figure out how to do a clearly romantic date._ Kululu realized with dread.

There were plenty of databases of their own on how to date a girl. But something about reading and analyzing them felt slightly more pathetic than over analyzing everything to figure out if you were dating someone.

And Kululu definitely didn't want to be pathetic. _Looking at other people and how they see overly romantic dates would be even more pathetic._ Everyone around him sucked at romance. And that wasn't a jerky insight. It was the truth.

Perhaps Momoka's view of overdoing things would help, but… _Being overdramatic and putting a lot of effort into something might make Mois suspicious. I mean….it is me._ And in any scenario where he put a lot of effort to be 'nice' it usually ended with him pulling something really jerky.

It was true that Mois might in fact not be suspicious because she was super kind, but Kululu couldn't take that chance that she'd believe that he was scheming something evil.

After all he wanted to figure out if she was dense. And he couldn't reasonably say she was dense if she thought he was scheming something. Just reasonably on guard.

 _I suppose...I'll just rely on myself for advice._ He thought with dread. If he planned this whole thing out and what he had to say to make something romantic, he wouldn't screw it up, right?

He just had to have confidence in himself that he would do this. _Push the fear down, and remember this is a huge test._ He couldn't think of himself in this situation.

He had to focus on the subject.

* * *

It was actually much easier to get Mois to go out with him than it was to get her to go to the movies. All he had to do was send a text.

Mois responded quickly, and seemed to suddenly have the free time now

 _Hmmm...Well it could be that she suddenly wants to spend more time with me._ Kululu thought to himself, noticing the quickness of a reply. Or more likely she wised up and realized that spending so much time with Keroro and thinking of Keroro's feelings first wasn't perhaps the nicest thing to do to a friend.

He had texted, "Good morning Mois!"

Kululu had heard that for some reason it actually helped in relationships by saying boring casual chit-chat, and by being nice. Who would have known?

"I was wondering if you wanted to go out with me today to the amusement park? It would make me happy to spend the whole day with you." Kululu had shivered when writing that part. It was hard to say the words 'it would make me happy'.

Being nice and direct and romantic was hard.

"Honestly it doesn't matter where we go. I just want to spend the day with you. You're really cute. Also you know, it would be cool to take you away from Keroro for a while. Ku, ku, ku. Can't wait to see the look on his face when he learns there's no one to dumb chores on." Kululu had to be a little rude. It would seem fake if he didn't.

He then added some emojis afterwards. Mois loved emojis and some of his research said it helped with things seeming like a date. The normal emoji's of course, the weirdly smoochy one and all the hearts.

"Sure! I like spending time with you too!" Mois had texted back quickly, with her own array of hugs, kisses and hearts.

Kululu trembled. _I've gotta figure this out quickly._ He decided. It was very difficult to tell with Mois if she had agreed to a date or just liked sending emojis. It was so confusing.

 _Why does she have to be so darn confusing?_ Kululu wondered.

* * *

It didn't take Keroro very long to figure out Kululu was going on a date. All he had to do was ask Mois if she could do the laundry that afternoon and she very easily explained that she was going out with Kululu to the amusement park so she couldn't.

"Guys! Guys! It's actually happening! I have proof this time!" Keroro ran over to Giroro and Dororo who were sitting in his room and talking with Tamama.

"What's happening?" Tamama asked hopefully. He hadn't been very included in the drama. It was like Dororo was replacing him and suddenly he was the one being ignored! He didn't like that!

"Uhhh nothing important." Giroro said quickly. If Tamama knew about Keroro's theory he wouldn't see it in the same way everybody else did, of Keroro being paranoid and interested in Mois. He'd see it as a way to eliminate his love rival. He'd be all for aiding Keroro.

Giroro wasn't sure how to get rid of Tamama though so Keroro could talk.

"Keroro wanted to discuss health foods and the proof about how they make a body stronger. He's gotten very into eating his veggies." Dororo explained.

Giroro gasped. Was Dororo secretly a great liar?

Tamama nodded. "I'm gonna like...leave then. There's no proof in that sort of stuff being healthy!" He pouted. "Chips give me my super strength! Not broccoli."

He ran out of the room before Keroro could talk.

"Why'd...You send him out? I don't care if Tamama learns the proof I have." Keroro shrugged. "The only one person I don't really want to know that I think Kululu and Mois are into each other, is Kululu himself. And I think I already botched that."

Giroro looked at him with pity. "Now...Keroro...What was this supposed proof you had?"

Keroro's eyes gleamed. "Real proof! Real! Mois's going out on a date with Kululu today!"

"Sure she is." Giroro rolled his eyes.

"No really! They're going to an amusement park together." Keroro told him. "She looked happy. She said Kululu asked her to go with him so she couldn't spend time with me today."

Dororo looked worried. "Oh dear...Kululu must have something wicked planned."

"That poor girl. There's so many dangerous things that happen at amusement parks." Giroro agreed. He'd been on the receiving end of many of them.

Merry go rounds hadn't been dangerous until Giroro rode one. Now everyone was warned not to fall off of the horse and get repeatedly hit by it.

"No! It's a date there's nothing wicked to this!" Keroro stomped his feet. "They're in love! And I win and have my proof now."

"Keroro...It's Kululu." Was all Giroro said. And then he stared at him for a moment.

Keroro sweated. "You really think Mois is in danger?"

Giroro nodded. "Extreme danger. In fact I wouldn't be surprised if he murdered her today. Or...Like tied her to some rollercoaster tracks and left like one of those evil 1920's villains."

Keroro frowned. He could see Kululu tying someone to rollercoaster tracks. In fact he was pretty sure Kululu had done the same thing to Giroro.

"Fine!" Keroro decided. "We'll follow them. And bail Mois out if she gets in trouble. But I'm positive she won't! Because I'm pretty sure they're on a date! And you'll see soon enough that they are!"

Giroro reluctantly nodded, for Keroro's sake to help him see that they weren't in love and in hope of helping Angol Mois.

Dororo and Giroro really were worried for her.

* * *

It was easy enough to find the amusement park closest to their home (built by the Nishizawa's used once for a Fuyuki plan, and now they were making a huge profit off of it.)

Keroro whistled when he saw all the rides. "So cool..." He drooled. "Hey, can I ride a rollercoaster?"

"I thought we were here to see what Mois and Kululu were doing!" Giroro reminded. "Don't get distracted."

Keroro looked bummed out. "Aww..."

"Wait….Can they even successfully...um..." Dororo frowned. How should he put this? "Ride any rides together? What is the appeal of coming to a pekoponian amusement park with someone when you're our height?"

"It was built by Momoka for some Fuyuki plan or something." Giroro shrugged. "And I remember her installing a lot of rides that had seats for us. You know to distract Tamama and Keroro. Which seems to be working now too..." He pulled Keroro back towards him instead of letting him wander off. "I'm not sure how the park staff explain this nowadays but we could in fact ride the rides."

"It's part of the appeal of the park." Keroro explained. "Baby seats for the roller coasters!" He said eagerly.

Giroro looked devastated that he was the height of a toddler. And that toddlers were being put on rollercoasters.

"In fact since there's so much merchandise modeled after our faces here, and people dressed up as keronians for Fuyuki that we could probably just walk around without our anti-barriers." Keroro explained.

Giroro shook his head. "Pekoponians aren't that stupid. They'd definitely notice that we're aliens from that."

Keroro shook his head. As if to prove this he turned off his anti-barrier. Barely anyone looked at him.

"Is that a costumed midget?" Someone said. But nobody really payed him any mind. Apparently there were so many frogs that that was just normal here.

"Huh." Giroro frowned. "The Nishizawa's really do blend society into being okay with the weirdest stuff." This place was probably great for all sorts of aliens.

It was too bad that the original use, getting Fuyuki to fall in love with Momoka, hadn't been successful.

Giroro turned towards the innerworkings of the park. "It's time." He said holding a gun. "Let's find Mois!"

"Giroro! I said keronians were fine to walk around here but that doesn't mean you can pull out a gun!" Keroro said quickly as numerous people turned to them.

Giroro quickly turned his anti-barrier on again. Oops.

* * *

Kululu and Angol Mois were easy enough to find. They were in line for some sort of ride.

Kululu was inserting something on the ground that seemed to zap everyone in line a little to the left, letting him and Mois jump up to the front of the line. He then picked up the small little device and brushed it off.

"After you." Kululu smirked.

Angol Mois glanced at the little bits of electricity on the ground, as everyone else looked slightly confused on how they had moved. "Why thank you!" She decided to take Kululu's genorisity despite it being at the cost of others.

She wasn't going to question good fortune and walked forward with Kululu grinning.

"...Well I guess...Um...He's being a gentleman?" Keroro tried to point out.

"No." Giroro frowned. "Don't even think that Keroro. Kululu's just using this to be a jerk."

Dororo nodded. "This is no date. This...Is an excuse to have an accomplice."

Keroro grimaced. He wasn't so sure.

* * *

Giroro and Dororo helped Keroro not be too obvious in his stalking. It seemed that Dororo's lack of a presence hided them from Kululu.

For a bit it just looked like Kululu and Mois were doing rather normal things, going on numerous things, and Kululu cutting in various lines or somehow getting people off of rides that he wanted the seats of. It was extremely petty and it was unclear if Mois noticed it at all.

The other thing he seemed to be doing a lot of was cheating. In various carnival games, that was.

"He can't do that! He just enlarged the rings in that ring toss without the guy noticing!" Keroro yelled to himself pointing at Kululu and Mois. "I always lose those games!" He whined.

"To...To be fair..." Giroro hated talking in Kululu's defense. "Amusment park games are built on cons. Without cheating I think it's near impossible to win. But that doesn't mean you don't try! Winning from real skill, and maybe a gun is more impressive than cheating!"

Dororo shook his head. "No guns, Giroro. No guns."

"This is so cute! Thank you!" Angol Mois jumped up and down at the teddy bear that he had won.

"Eh, it was nothing. These games are easy. And with strategy you can win most anything." Kululu told her trying to play it cool. _I think I'm doing pretty well at this._ "Do you want to try the next one?"

"The darts?" Angol Mois asked looking at this game that involved popping balloons with darts, "I don't think I'd be very good at it." She shook her head. "Although I do like popping things."

"It's a game of chance. I'm sure you'll do fine!" Kululu tried to ease her.

Mois nodded and gave it a shot. Kululu pressed a button popping all of the balloons.

The con man with the balloons mouth hung open. That wasn't supposed to happen.

"I won!" Angol Mois clapped, "I did it!"

Kululu grinned. "Good for you. I knew you could. Ku, ku, ku." He laughed wickedly.

It was kinda nice to see her so happy. But he had a job to do. Up this to a more romantic level to measure her denseness. "It's nice to see you so happy. Your smile is one of the things I l-lo..." Yeah he couldn't do that. "Adore about you." _Crap! I'm supposed to be acting. Why am I still too terrified to do a perfect act?_

He guessed Mois was just that terrifying. She really was a frustrating source of confusion for him. Even when pretending around her he couldn't do certain things, like saying the word love because it made his tongue freeze up and all.

Adore would have to be romantic enough.

* * *

"I think Kululu might be trying to turn Mois into his accomplice." Giroro realized after the last stall. "That must be what this whole day is about." He was trying to figure out why Kululu wanted to spend the day at an amusement park.

For the biggest jerk around, and something that Giroro labeled as an enemy on every other day, he couldn't figure it out. Why did Kululu want to come here?

It had to be something evil.

Kululu was currently riding the merry go round with Mois and glancing at her every now and then to brush his hand against her hair. "It was in your face." He would claim.

"Hahaha! We're spinning! Just like a drill in the planet." Angol Mois was just so into the merry go round thing.

Keroro frowned. "You seeing the same thing I'm seeing? Cuz like...he keeps touching her all simple like. The simple sort of touches totally mean it's a date."

Dororo put his hand on Keroro and sighed. Keroro had an overactive imagination. "Or he's a creep, Keroro. And we already know he's creepy."

Keroro sighed. They wouldn't believe anything would they?

* * *

"You know, you're really cute." Kululu told her, trying to do his best to be sort of cuddly on a bench. He was sitting close to her, trying to put his hand on her's every now and then. Of course since it was Kululu he kept pulling his hand back like he had stuck it in a vat of acid or something. Then he would repeat the whole process again.

"Aww thank you!" Said Mois who didn't respond in any different way.

Kululu twitched in a little bit of annoyance. _I'm trying to be romantic and compliment you. Why aren't you responding any differently?_ "You're very pretty. I mean you always are, but I think you're especially pretty today."

"Oh? Why? I didn't cut my hair or anything." Mois pointed out.

Kululu frowned. "Well it's because I have you all to myself, of course." He brushed her fingers against her cheek, inching closer to her chin, to get her to look at him.

That proved to be a mistake. Much to intimate for him. "Hn!" He pulled away. _Okay, new idea. Don't do the romantic eye contact thing. That's a mistake. Everything else is fine though._

Mois giggled.

 _I don't know what that means!_ Kululu thought annoyed, was the idea of wanting to spend time with her alone funny. Or was that like a cute giggle? He didn't understand.

He needed to up the romance.

"Mind if I choose the next ride?" He asked.

She nodded and he took her hand, leading her to the tunnel of love because no date would be complete without a ride in that.

* * *

"He took her to the tunnel of love! That's gotta be proof!" Keroro pointed.

"The water's probably got acid." Giroro shrugged. "He begged me to go in one of those with him. It was overly romantic. And then there was acid." Nothing Kululu did was genuine.

Keroro pouted! He would prove to them that they were in love! _And if they aren't in love...I'll make them fall in love! Yes!_ Keroro realized he had a plan now. To meddle in their date to make it more romantic!

"Giroro, can you shoot one of your missile things at them when they're in the tunnel?" Keroro asked.

"Sure." Giroro said a little too quickly.

"I haven't explained why yet!" Keroro realized. "It's going to rock the boat, the missile. And then Mois will fall on top of Kululu. And then they'll be all blushy and confess their real feelings for each other! Mois will be like 'Kululu-kun I've always loved you. Everything is doki doki." Keroro spoke anime and grew long eyelashes to act out the scene.

Giroro stared at him blankly. "You got this idea from anime didn't you? And...Please don't speak like that."

Keroro grumbled but nodded. But Giroro was already on board to shoot something.

* * *

Kululu tried to sit next to Mois as close as he possibly could.

"You know, I've never been in one of these! I was hoping there would be a little more explosions." Mois frowned. "But I've always wanted to go in one of these. It's fun anyway!" She reassured him.

"Yeah, fun..." _All right...The hammer I installed to bump the boat should be coming any moment now…_ Kululu planned.

A giant hammer swung from the ceiling behind them to bump the boat. After all Kululu had the same plan that Keroro had had, he had to up the romance in this date somehow. And scheming seemed to be the way he had planned.

Unfortunately that was right when the missile came, exploding the hammer before any cliched fall scene could happen.

Kululu's glasses broke. _That...Wasn't supposed to happen._ He looked behind them at the loud explosion.

"Wow! One did happen. You could say, count your chickens before they hatch?" She glanced at Kululu. "Did you install something to explode on this ride...For me?" Her eyes were sparkling, totally interested in that.

"...Uh yeah." He lied. _That wasn't supposed to happen._

"You're so cool, Kululu." She told him swooning a little, grabbing his hand and squeezing it. "Really really cool."

Kululu blushed. _Maybe it's for the best though._ He was...technically holding her hand. And that was something close to what he was trying to get?

He didn't pull away.

* * *

The next ride they went on was a roller coaster. It was very huge, and terrifying. Perhaps it was supposed to be used to get Fuyuki to cling to Momoka. And now Kululu was going to get what Momoka never could. Someone successfully clinging.

At the top of one of the really long falls, Kululu glanced at Mois. "There's supposed to be breaks at the bottom of this." He told her.

"Supposed to?" She noted.

He held up a screw. "I, 'borrowed' one of the essential parts. Ku, ku, ku." There was no reason to be up front about it. "So I guess we're just going to fall for much longer, babe." He had to be at least somewhat a jerk, "Ku, ku, ku." He grinned. "It's all right. If you want to hold onto me or something I won't mind. It is a large fall."

The trick here was to get Mois to cling to him. And tease her a little bit.

"Oh. Well if you just wanted me to hold your hand or something you could have just asked, Kululu." Mois frowned. "You didn't have to break a roller coaster." Was everybody's life in peril now? Eh. She'd be calm about this.

Kululu frowned. _Mois always seems to...read too much into things. What I hate the most is that she's right when she does read into stuff._ He was trying to get her to hold onto him.

Unfortunately for Kululu Keroro was at the bottom of the roller coaster. "I'm going to break this thing so they'll fall harder! Then they'll cling to each other!" He proclaimed.

"Keroro, that's dangerous-" Dororo tried to be moral reason. But it was already too late.

"I'll just insert screws everywhere!" Keroro said, accidentally fixing the part Kululu broke.

And to mostly Kululu's surprise the ride worked as intended. No extra fall was added.

Angol Mois looked at him very confused. She didn't understand the point in lying about a prank. _Is there something I'm missing? Perhaps I can't think like a jerk to see the benefit in that._ "Um..."

"Never mind about that whole breaking the ride thing." Kululu said quickly throwing away the screw.

What the heck was going on?

* * *

Kululu and Angol Mois passed a booth with a hammer and a bell. It was one of those hit the bell things to win a prize.

"Hey, do you think I can do that?" Kululu asked. "I bet I could win at that thing."

"Well of course you could, I bet you have all sorts of inventions to modify the weight of the hammer-" Angol Mois was cut off.

"No! Not by cheating." Kululu shook his head, "Ku, ku, ku. I bet I could win normally. It doesn't take that much strength to hit the bell with a giant hammer."

"Well...I wouldn't say it was cheating. More like creativity. But...I suppose you're right that's not the way it's intended to be used." She nodded.

Kululu looked at her waiting for an answer on if he could do it?

Angol Mois winced. "Uhhh..." She didn't really want to answer. _Sure I want Kululu to feel confident if he wants to be strong but..._ Kululu wasn't strong.

Kululu grinned. "You don't think I can do it. Well! That makes things interesting. Let's make a bet then! Ku, ku, ku. I love rubbing it in people's faces when I win."

Angol Mois looked interested. "All right. As long as it's mostly harmless. No asking me to beat someone up." She insisted.

"Sure. But let's still make the bet fun, right? Ku, ku, ku." Kululu teased. "How about...If I manage to get the bell to ring from hitting it with a hammer...Uhh let me think of something just off the top of my head..." He pretended to think. "Oh! How about you give me a kiss or something. That would be funny! Ku, ku, ku." Kululu tried to act a little normal, calm, despite the request.

Angol Mois nodded in agreement. Feeling a little sorry that his arms were so weak. "Good luck, Kululu! I believe in you!" She pat him on the back.

Kululu grinned and walked up picking up the hammer. _Of course I rigged this ahead of time. All of this was planned._ He grinned to himself. He had installed a device in the bell that would make it ring if he hit the part in a certain way. It was nothing about strength.

Unfortunately Keroro had heard about the bet. "Omg! It's definitely a date now! They're going to kiss!"

"He's mocking her!" Giroro just tried to get this through Keroro's thick skull.

"Also there's no way he can hit the bell." Dororo sighed.

Keroro shook his head. "He can! If we help him! I'll help Kululu out just this once. Wingman his date and all? Dororo would you take some parts off the top, just to make it easier."

Dororo sighed and nodded, always going along with whatever stupid thing Keroro wanted. He sneakily climbed onto the thing and took off some parts to make it lighter, including the part Kululu had installed.

Now that the machine was not rigged, Kululu tried to hit the machine and didn't even get the measurement tool to go up even a little bit.

"Youch..." Kululu winced. That...Was very pathetic. And what happened to his machine? He stared at the pathetic score for a minute.

"It's...It's all right." Angol Mois tried to reassure him, realizing he had actually thought he would make that, despite his incredible weakness. "Nobody could do it! See?" She took the hammer from him. "Armaggedon 1/100000!" She shouted.

That was the only way she hit things after all.

Kululu watched as the machine just straight up exploded (Dororo falling off in the distance along with it, although he didn't notice) and the measurement tool shot somewhere to the moon.

The person running the booth stared in shock.

"I...I win I guess?" Mois giggled nervously.

"Time to run before we get charged with property damage, Mois." He grabbed her hand. "Ku, ku, ku. That was awesome by the way." He was laughing a lot and flicked a tear out of his eye. "Loved the shocked expression of all the onlookers."

Mois gave a nervous smile. They had looked scared but the only thing that really mattered was that Kululu was happier now.

* * *

Keroro and crew had followed Mois and Kululu around the whole day. And although Kululu was acting weirdly affectionate, Giroro and Dororo still weren't seeing the two of them being in love.

It was almost night now, the sky was purple-ish and almost dark. Kululu and Mois were heading to their last ride, the ferris wheel.

"All right guys! I think this one will prove it!" Keroro insisted. "We'll...Just make them get stuck at the top. Then they'll have time to smooch and stuff."

"And how are we going to see that?" Giroro asked not even startled by Keroro's stupidity.

"I have bird watching goggles." Dororo offered.

And Keroro quickly started playing around with wiring, unaware he was yet again fixing a machine.

For Kululu himself had already tried to initiate this plan and make him and Mois stuck at the top at the perfect time, so they could see the fireworks. And Keroro was fixing that now.

He had no clue.

* * *

Kululu waited for them to get to the top and stop, briefly and then realize that they were stuck. Once they stopped for the normal wait, Kululu started talking.

"I had fun today." He told her. "But I guess that's obvious. Anyone would have fun with a pretty girl like you."

"Thanks!" Mois said chipperly.

 _Tch._ Kululu thought to himself. _She's not blushing or anything when I flirt with her._ He was flirting right? He was pretty sure he was, he was almost constantly calling her cute, sometimes saying babe and always talking about how lucky he was.

 _She's just acting like normal. I can't tell if she realizes this is a date or not. Which doesn't tell me anything about how dense she is. Were we just...always on dates? Or is she just extremely dense and doesn't know this is a date?_ Kululu had no clue.

What else could he do to make this more romantic? They would watch the fireworks together when they realized the ferris wheel wouldn't start again of course, but what else?

He wracked his mind. _Romance isn't just about words. It's about body language too._ He reminded. And he had been trying to be more physical, touching her hand more and all, but perhaps he needed more.

 _I..I need to kiss her._ He realized. _That way there would be no ounce of confusion that this at least is a date._ He told himself.

She wouldn't kiss a friend now would she? And that would give him some idea where she stood on this.

He looked at her, and although he shivered a lot when she looked back he could feel the pit of his stomach doing even more flips than usual. The idea of kissing Mois seemed somehow more terrifying than having eye contact making eye contact just one torture before his execution, so thus tolerable.

"M-mois-" He tried to whisper, inching closer to her. He moved his hand delicately to her face, touching it gently as if to visualize what was going to happen.

He could do this. He could do it. He had to just keep telling himself that.

He pulled himself a little closer and stood up on the seat so they were now directly at eye level. And then he moved slightly closer.

 _Okay we're not...k-kissing yet. But we're close. Perhaps that's romantic enough?_ He hoped. His hand moved to her hair weaving his fingers through it.

This seemed to relax her and she smiled, just kind of softly. She still had no idea what was going on obviously.

 _God why couldn't she just kiss me back with the hammer? That would have been so much easier than making this...First move thing._ And her kissing him he could tease about. This...This was torturous. Much harder.

He tried to pull her even closer, his other hand on her shoulder, "M-mois, M-mois." He kept stumbling over his words, repeating her name.

 _This is hard!_ He cursed. _All this testing to see if she likes me._

"Kululu." She repeated, deciding they were just saying each other's names.

The way she said his name felt like prickles in his skin. "C-can I c-can I kis-" He couldn't do it. He couldn't ask. His lips were already hot like it was happening. But it wasn't.

He pulled away quickly, the eye contact and everything else being too much for him. "S-stop staring at me!" He begged.

She covered her eyes doing as he said.

 _Maybe I can do it now?_ He thought to himself. Just a quick kiss on her hands or lips or something. That would be easy. She wasn't looking.

And she looked really cute, she was still happy despite covering her eyes and not being able to enjoy the view.

 _No._ Kululu realized. _I can't do it._ Not because he was scared (or at least he didn't think he was that scared) _This is a test to determine how dense she is. Kissing her...Might be a little extreme. And if she didn't know this was a date and learned from me kissing her it might freak her out a little._

In the end that probably wouldn't go over well. Extremeness was sometimes good for a test, but he could determine if this was a date to her later or differently.

He wouldn't do that to Mois, putting her through that sort of test. The only reason he was able to act this romantic after all was because he was trying to get a response out of her. It wasn't the most real.

 _The movie date might have been realer than this one._ If it was a date that was. And that was what he was trying to determine.

What was a date to her? And was she okay with doing those sort of things with him?

The ferris wheel started moving again. _Darn!_ Kululu thought. "I wonder if my fears prevented me from being correct in my calculations." He accidentally said out loud.

Angol Mois glanced at him. Was another thing going to explode? _Kululu looks annoyed._ Had something not gone according to some sort of scheme he was setting up.

She leaned next to him to try to cheer him up. "Hey Kululu?" She asked.

"Yeah?" Kululu glanced over.

"Can we do this more often? I mean this sort of thing. Outings like these, and that movie thing." Mois asked. "On a more regular basis."

"Y-you mean like...seeing each other?" Kululu asked.

"Yeah! Like that. I think that would be good. Are...Are you okay with that?" Angol Mois asked.

"Y-yeah!" Kululu answered a little too quickly and optimistically.

Angol Mois smiled. "Yay! I think that will be lots of fun!" She looked like she was radiating with joy.

As they got off the ferris wheel Kululu had one thought.

 _Okay...Now I really need to figure out if that movie thing was a date or not. Because if so I just agreed to be in a relationship._ And he couldn't tell, that was the problem.

Was Mois talking about hanging out more frequently as friends? Or did she just ask him out to have a regular relationship?

 _I had to say yes to find the answer._ Kululu reminded. _But...That's part of the problem isn't it…? She herself said she doesn't know if that was a date._ He remembered what she had said about the movie. She had shrugged.

So...Did that mean neither of them knew if they were dating or not?

 _Well...This is a confusing puzzle._ He just hoped that amusement park thing had made things clear enough and that she was not as dense as he feared. _I like puzzles though._ He thought kind of secretly to himself.

He didn't mind this. It was a mystery he was determined to uncover.

This thing...Was now entirely up to him to figure out. Not Keroro. Not Giroro. Nobody but him.

This was between him and Mois.

* * *

Giroro was still utterly convinced that Kululu's entire day at the amusement park was for some evil purpose.

"I'm telling you Kululu doesn't have feelings!" He tried to tell Keroro. "And Mois...She has standards. Low standards but that's still higher than Kululu."

Dororo looked skeptical that Keroro was hire than Kululu but eventually nodded. "Giroro is right."

Keroro grinded his teeth. "Well, I'll show you two that that was a date. I'll ask Mois." It was the next day after all. And Mois should know if that was a date or not. After all the whole thing looked obviously like a date to him.

"Hey Mois? At the amusement park, did you and Kululu go on a date?" Keroro asked.

Angol Mois looked confused. "Oh no." She shook her head. "We didn't." She smiled.

"Huh? Why?" Keroro asked. "Wasn't he...I mean I don't know because I wasn't following you or anything but wasn't he touching you a lot and calling you cute? Not that I know of course!" Keroro said hurriedly.

Mois didn't suspect he had stalked her. "He was." She admitted. "But that wasn't a date. After all, he calls me cute all the time. And he acts a lot like that all the time." She smiled revealing her true thoughts on the matter.

Dororo frowned. "Mois...I don't...I don't think you were on a date, but...Umm..When someone calls you cute that much it's usually a sign of flirting."

"He was being creepy of course, but uhh...Yeah your logic is a little flawed." Giroro agreed.

"Mois! He's into you!" Keroro just outwardly called her out on her denseness. "You probably went on a date!"

Mois gasped and covered her mouth. "He is?" She looked shocked again. "Wait. No I'm not falling for this lie again." She remembered and looked down at Keroro skeptically.

Dororo did make a good point about the cute thing. Had that been a date? She slowly realized looking back on it that she was just as confused about the amusement park as the movies.

She could not tell for the life of herself if those were dates or not to Kululu. It was so hard sometimes when he acted so weird all the time.

 _Wait...If that was a date...Did I ask him out?_ She had this look of shock on her face. _Are we dating now?_

Honestly she had no clue. And that was a real problem.

She had to figure this out. Was Kululu flirting with her? Was he into her like Keroro said and had he taken her on dates and was she now in a relationship with him?

She had no clue, but she really wanted to figure out.

And so continued the confusion of Keroro, Kululu and Mois.

* * *

 **All right! Updated! I really wanted to write a kurumois date, I love date scenes but I'm really bad at writing them. I hoped I made it humorous enough.**

 **Please review.**


	5. Glitter Corner

Keroro was groaning. He was out of ideas. What if Angol Mois really didn't like Kululu? What if everybody was telling him the truth when they said she was madly in love with him?

 _If that wasn't a date….Well maybe I really am reading too much into things._ Keroro had thought he was the only one smart enough to see the obvious, but literally everybody else in the entire world was telling him he was wrong.

Dororo noticed Keroro's bad mood and gloominess. He knew Giroro wanted Keroro to realize things, but he didn't think there was anything good about pushing Keroro into something. _He's got to realize it on his own and slowly. So he can accept Mois's feelings for him. And possibly his own feelings._

"Hey, um Keroro...I had an idea for how to 'prove' Mois's feelings." Dororo said suddenly.

Keroro looked at him listening for once. "What is it?"

Dororo wanted to shed tears of joy that Keroro was listening to him. "Well...We could...make them jealous." He suggested. Dororo wasn't very good at being scheming, but he was giving it a try. "You know...Flirt with Mois in front of Kululu. You could do that, right?"

Keroro's eyes widened. He had no idea that Dororo was trying to get him to flirt with Mois. "You know...That might work. I've heard that's a cliché manga plot. Making the other person jealous." And if it was in manga it had to be true.

Dororo smiled beneath his mask. His scheme was working.

"But what about Kululu?" Keroro asked frowning. "Anybody flirting with him wouldn't be believable in the least bit. Nobody likes him." He pointed out. "Not only that but we would have to find someone to fake flirt with him."

Dororo's eyes drifted to Giroro. Keroro saw where he was looking. "Oh." Keroro said slowly.

When anybody didn't want to do something, the work always shifted to Giroro. And this was one of the events that nobody in their right mind would want to do. So it fell to the butt monkey.

Giroro looked up from polishing his gun. "What do you want?"

"Giroro, Giroro, I've got a task for you in our plot." Keroro put his arm around Giroro's shoulder. "Do you know where I store all my make up?"

Giroro looked incredibly worried about that statement. But as Dororo and Keroro cornered him he knew there was zero chance of escape.

Somehow he knew he wouldn't like what he was supposed to do.

* * *

When everyone was assembling in the base, Keroro smiled. Hopefully Mois would have some sort of reaction to this flirtation.

"Where's Giroro?" Tamama asked, looking confused. Everybody was here, except Giroro.

"Well you see, he's on a trip!" Keroro lied. He opened the door and Giroro walked in, in a pink skirt, heavy lipstick, a blonde flowing wig, long eyelashes and fake boobs. "We'll be having his twin sister in the invasion meeting today instead! The one that he's never mentioned ever and was a huge secret."

Everybody stared at the obvious Giroro. Giroro covered his face. "Dororo...Keroro's seen a keronian woman before, right?" He whispered to Dororo. He hadn't been for this plan at all but for some reason Keroro was oddly persuasive. It was like once the word Natsumi was even used in a sentence Giroro lost his common sense.

Dororo looked in shame. "I...I don't know. We know Pururu...And I hope he knows that she doesn't have...breasts. But with Keroro sometimes I don't know if he's smart enough to notice this stuff."

Kululu and Tamama both dropped out of their chairs just laughing.

"Hold on, let me get my camera. Ku, ku, ku. Stand right there, Giroro." He requested.

"His, I mean her name isn't Giroro! She just looks like him because she's his twin sister. Her name is Girlolo." Keroro proclaimed.

Tamama laughed harder. "It's just the name girl! Mr. Sergeant is a riot!" Tamama pounded his fists on the ground.

"Girlolo…?" Giroro asked. _This really is making me question how much Keroro knows about keronian females._

Keroro cleared his throat and glanced over at Kululu. "The plan." He tried to cough out to remind Giroro what his task was.

Giroro's eyes lit up. _Oh yeah. The worst part of this whole thing._ Luckily a lot of the platoon was blinded by the tears in their eyes from their laughter.

Mois and Keroro seemed to be the only ones not laughing. Even Dororo was trying not to laugh. Keroro, because he was beaming, thinking himself a genius, and Mois was looking at Giroro's fake boobs probably wondering if she really didn't know anything at all about keronians.

Giroro sighed and walked over to Kululu, trying to assemble his camera, laughing on the floor. "Hey...Bad boy. I'm...Girlolo." He was literally shuddering as he said it. "I think your….ick. Hot. Yeah."

Kululu looked at him for one second. "You're...Hitting on me?" He asked. "Oh my god. That makes this whole situation even more gold. Ku, ku, ku." He laughed even harder.

"If you wanted me to hit you all you had to do was ask." Giroro hissed, raising his fist.

"Girlolo. No!" Keroro yelled.

Giroro restrained his fist with extreme difficulty.

"I mean...I wanted to kiss you with my fist. Smooch." Giroro said deadpanningly, punching Kululu very lightly in the face.

"I...I can't operate this quick enough..." Kululu was struggling with the camera. This was just too funny. "Here, Mois. You're somehow… Ku. Immune to the hilarousness of this situation." He tossed the camera to Angol Mois.

Angol Mois caught it. "Oh! Should...Should I be laughing?" She asked a little confused, and turning on the camera properly.

"Of course you should be! Just look at him! And...His name." Kululu chuckled again, trying to get himself up, and standing.

"Maybe she thinks that's really what keronian girls look like!" Tamama laughed, "Man, that woman is so dumb."

Keroro looked down, a little ashamed. _Keronian girls...Oh yeah. I know Pururu._ He glanced at Giroro. _Should have just drawn several hearts on him._

Hearts seemed accurate for keronian girls. Maybe more so than the fake boobs.

Angol Mois slowly started chuckling to herself too, at Giroro's appearance and so she could be in on the joke. "Haha! It is funny, isn't it? He's….Got a secret twin sister never mentioned before."

"We're laughing at his appearance." Tamama smugly said.

"And how he's acting. I mean..He was flirting with me a second ago! Ku, ku, ku. I wonder who put him up to that?" Kululu laughed.

"I...I wasn't flirting with you a second ago. I was flirting with you now." Giroro shook his head. "You know what? I'm not lowering myself to this level." He pulled off the fake boobs and wig. "There are so many things wrong with this. Flirting with Kululu for one, and then...Keronian women don't look like this." He glared at Keroro.

"Giroro! Where did you come from?" Kululu faked. "Where did your pretty fake sister go?" He put a hand on his forehead. "She was so original and beautiful that I think I might faint. Ku, ku, ku."

Giroro sighed as Tamama, Kululu, and even Dororo continued snickering. And now Mois was laughing too.

"I...I guess flirting with Kululu really was a dead giveaway that it was fake." Keroro sighed. "Or...Or maybe you just weren't a good enough actor!" He tried to have hope. "If I tried..."

"Do you really want to lower yourself that much?" Giroro glanced.

Now Keroro shivered. Giroro was right. He couldn't do that. "Yeah I get it. We won't try that again."

Everybody continued to laugh.

* * *

The next plan was one that involved Keroro.

"I won't do it." Keroro insisted.

"I flirted with Kululu. So now you've gotta do your part." Giroro crossed his arms. "Stop being a baby."

"But the whole point of them being in love is that she's not in love with me!" Keroro admitted.

"It's not because you're rooting for their happiness or are observant or something?" Dororo raised a brow. At least Keroro was admitting why he was so dedicated to this theory.

"Well...It's that too." Keroro nodded. "But...W-what if..." _What if Mois likes it when I flirt with her?_ Keroro worried. _No. I have to have faith in her._ "What if I'm not a good enough actor?" Keroro worried.

"You always boast about your acting." Giroro growled.

"You'll do fine, Keroro. Just...Look in your heart. Think romantic things" Dororo suggested. "I'm sure you'll do fine at flirting with Mois."

Keroro's uncomfortable was mistaken for embarrassment as he started to sweat. Could he really do this?

* * *

Keroro tried to gather his courage when the platoon was in the room. Angol Mois was cutting out fliers for their latest plan luring pekoponian youth to a fake rock concert that would put in the idea of invasion.

"Um...You're really good at cutting." Keroro tried to compliment. _How do you fake flirt with someone?_ He had never done this. It had to be raising their egos!

Angol Mois glanced at him and gave a big wide smile. "Thank you! I had hoped you'd notice. Cutting things is more fun than I thought it would be. Scissors are rather fun, aren't they?" She sparkled innocently.

Keroro wasn't sure if he should be worried.

Keroro placed his hand over Mois's and tried to bat his eyelashes lovingly and flirtily. "I really like looking at your hands work. They're nice hands. Feel nice too." He held Mois's hand.

Angol Mois looked completely confused at how Keroro was acting. She had never seen Keroro act into her. "I...I can't really continue cutting if you're holding my hand, Uncle?" She reminded. She wasn't sure if he was complimenting her work ethic.

Keroro slowly took his hands off Mois's. "You're really pretty, you know that! Super cute! You're like..the prettiest girl I know. Way prettier than Natsumi."

Angol Mois blushed.

"That's not true." Giroro hissed under his breath, "Nobody's prettier than Natsumi."

Tamama stopped what he was doing, dropping everything in his hands, which happened to be a crate of glitter. "AH HELL NO." He dropped to the ground about to scream.

"THEY'RE FLIRTING! OH NO! OH NO!" Tamama ran over to Keroro. "Don't let that woman trick you, Mr. Sergeant. Girls aren't the only things that are pretty! And just because she's good at doing work doesn't mean she's perfect! I can cut things too!" Tamama picked up scissors.

"Uhh...But you were decorating the flyers." Keroro told him. _Darn! I wanted Kululu jealous. Why is Tamama acting so weird about this?_ He would have to investigate later if Tamama was in love with Mois. That always was a possibility after all.

Keroro tried to glance over to Kululu. Kululu was cackling as usual, in his evil way. He wasn't even stepping in to say anything.

 _Augh. Tamama is making this situation not very threatening!_ Keroro thought worriedly.

"Heck! I can cut people too. I can cut her-" Tamama said desperately. "So I'm the best with scissors! I'm the pretty one!" He looked distraught.

"Um...Tamama...Could you go back to decorating the fliers?" Keroro asked. "I...I kinda want to be alone with, Mois. You understand, right? She's not just a platoon mate. She's something special to me." Keroro told him.

Tamama stared at him. Then he started crying. Keroro didn't understand why.

"Oh no...Tamama, is something wrong? I'm sure Uncle can spend time with both of us again soon." Mois said kindly.

Tamama just sobbed. "I hate you!" He screamed and tried to run back to the glitter corner, so he could conceal his crying from Keroro.

Giroro and Dororo were wincing. "Well, I mean...We were rooting for her, but I do feel kind of sorry for him."

"I don't particularly think he had a chance, Giroro. But I'm sure he'll get over it." Dororo reassured. "You know what they say, there are plenty of fish in the sea."

Angol Mois gasped. "Tamama? You've taken up fishing? Is that why you're sad? Dororo's right! You could say, there are plenty of fish!"

Tamama's sobs became louder and angrier. "WHY DID I LOSE TO SOMEONE SO DUMB?"

"Hey, it was bound to happen eventually." Kululu finally spoke in the conversation, "You knew this was going to happen. Ku, ku, ku."

"No I didn't!" Tamama sobbed. "I don't know things that I don't want to know!"

"Ku, ku, ku." Kululu just shook his head and scolding. "I mean I'm sure everybody in this room knew the captain and Mois were endgame. I never did imagine that he'd be smart enough to recognize that she's his special person, but that's only because everyone I know is a dense idiot."

Tamama looked at Keroro. "Go back to being dense!" He begged.

"Uhh..." Keroro no longer knew what was happening. Why was Tamama sad. "No." He refused, knowing Kululu was finally part of the situation. "I mean I don't really understand why you're so upset? I just really wanted to flirt-" He tried to fake a blush, "I mean compliment Mois!"

"You're...Flirting with me? Uncle's...actually flirting with me?" Angol Mois was shocked. She looked happy for a second, and then a little worried. She glanced at Kululu very quickly.

"Eh, it's about time." Kululu shrugged, looking rather bored. He then went back to his computer, tuning out the rest of the conversation, obviously bored with the actual happiness and romance around him.

Giroro smirked a little to himself and grinned to Keroro. _See? Nothing. No jealousy and all._

Keroro frowned visibly and grimaced. There really was nothing from him.

Mois wasn't saying anything, but she tried to slap her cheeks to shake away the confusion. _I guess...We're not dating, or else Kululu would be bothered by Uncle being interested in me._

She looked at Keroro about to respond to him.

"Uhhh….I think I hear my Mom calling." Keroro said the oldest excuse on the book. He then ran out of the room.

Tamama stopped sniffling. "Your...Mom isn't on this planet. Wait, are you ditching that woman? Ditch her!" He smiled hopefully.

Keroro couldn't hear him, he was gone.

* * *

Keroro groaned. His plan hadn't worked at all. _Nor Kululu and Mois were jealous at all!_

He browsed on his computer trying to shake off the fear that Mois now thought he was into her. Eventually he got an email from a stranger, with only the name 'Shar'

 _Shar! Like in Gundam!_ Keroro's eyes brightened. He didn't know this guy but he hoped perhaps he was winning a gundam model contest.

He opened the email.

 _So jealousy, huh? Not a bad tactic if you actually used it right._

Keroro blinked. Was….Shar talking about how he was trying to figure out if Mois and Kululu were interested in each other?

 _If they're really dating won't she react badly to the idea that the guy is 'hanging out' with people in the same way that he's hanging out with her?_

 _At least that's what I'd imply if I was in your position. But man, you really are an idiot if I have to email you advice._

The email stopped after that. Keroro's eyes were wide as he clicked on it and read it again.

There were a couple things he learned from the email. _1\. Someone knows about my plan and is emailing me advice. 2. Is shar from Gundam an actual god? Is he real?_ Keroro wondered.

Who else would it be after all who knew what was going on.

There was a third thing he learned, of course, a new plan. _I guess...I have to pretend Kululu's hanging out with someone else in the way he's hanging out with Mois. That...Is a good idea actually._ It was better than having someone pretend to be in love with Kululu.

A lie was much easier to maintain than fake flirtation.

* * *

Keroro made the mistake of speaking up when Kululu was in the room. For some reason he didn't notice that Kululu was in the room, perhaps he had forgotten about him.

He really had thought it was only him, Mois, and Dororo.

"You know, I saw Kululu hanging around an amusement park the other day." Keroro mentioned off-handidly.

"Oh?" Angol Mois asked, not that interested. She knew Kululu was hanging out with her. She did look directly at Kululu when Keroro was talking though, wondering if he was bothered by Keroro mentioning this.

"Yeah! He was hanging out with someone. He kept talking about how cute they were and complimenting them." Keroro smiled. "I guess it's a regular thing, they seemed close. I mean I almost thought it was a date."

"Uncle, it's not nice to assume things about people." Mois said sternly. She glanced at Kululu a little worriedly again. Was he okay with Keroro assuming that about them?

"Why not? I'm just gossiping with you." Keroro shrugged, unaware Kululu was right behind him. "I mean he wasn't out with you."

"….Huh?" Angol Mois asked, now looking directly at Keroro. She had assumed Keroro was talking about them. "He...Wait, go back, what did you see?" She was just completely confused, and staring.

"Ku, ku, ku. Yeah, I'd like to hear the gossip." Kululu now walked over to the conversation.

Keroro gulped. _Crap! I didn't know Kululu was here. How am I supposed to lie about Kululu when Kululu's present?_

"So let me repeat what you claimed." Kululu grinned, looking like he was about to cut Keroro's lie wide open. "You saw me spending time with someone, talking about how cute they were, complimenting them...touching their cheek and stuff like that, and talking about our regular hang out sessions and all?"

Keroro grimaced. Some of those things he hadn't mentioned. But that sounded like what Kululu did with Mois. "I...I didn't mention the touching." But he gave a small nod.

"Oh. Well I was touching their cheek a lot. Ku, ku, ku. You know just normal stuff." Kululu shrugged.

Angol Mois and Keroro's jaws opened a little. Kululu was spending time with someone like that?

 _Is he going along with the lie?_ Keroro wondered.

"I...I didn't know you were hanging out with s-someone else-" Angol Mois tried to figure out what to say.

"Someone else?" Kululu looked up and smirked a little, "Oh?"

"Um..Never mind." Mois squeaked, trying to hide the fact that she was both shocked, and looked a little sad. "Who?"

"Tamama. He's quite a cute guy." Kululu said quickly.

"WHAT?" Keroro yelled. Tamama? And Kululu? He tried to imagine Kululu flirting with Tamama, touching his cheek and stuff.

Something about that made him increasingly uncomfortable. It didn't sound right.

 _Is he really lying? Wait...What if I accidentally happened upon the truth?_ What if Tamama and Kululu were hanging out sort of romantically? Keroro looked panicky.

"I thought you saw all this happen, captain." Kululu told him tilting his head. "You wouldn't be so surprised if you knew all this." He put his hand on Keroro's shoulder, "...Right?" He gave this sort of evil smile.

Keroro knew he had to keep up his lie, but part of him was still in shock, his head was spinning and he felt light-headed at the idea of Kululu and Tamama of all people. _He is pretty cute so saying he's cute all the time does make sense though._ He realized. "Y-yeah…."

Seeing Kululu's evil smile was terrifying. Did Kululu know he had made the whole thing up? Was Kululu lying? Keroro didn't know any more?

"I...I had no i-idea you and Tamama were so close." Angol Mois looked like she was confused by all of this now too. "...You were calling Tamama cute?"

"He is." Kululu shrugged, "I mean you've described him as cute plenty of times. So...There's nothing weird about me describing him as cute. And he really is. He's sickeningly cute. Toxicatingly so." Kululu hissed.

Now Angol Mois looked a little hurt. "...That's what you call me." She said in a hushed voice, her hands distracted by crumpling something in her hands, some paper that she was supposed to throw away.

Kululu looked up. _I guess Keroro's useful for something. Ku, ku, ku. I wonder if he thinks an actual gundam character emailed him._ All was going according to plan.

"He's not that cute." Angol Mois said a little childishly. "I mean it's Tamama. He's kinda...weird."

"No, Kululu's right, he is cute. All of Kululu's story checks out." Keroro bit his lip. Was he lucky to have not been exposed on his lie? Then why did this whole story make him feel so worried for Tamama?

It was true karma for Angol Mois to be jealous of Tamama. It was unfortunate that Tamama wasn't in the room or else he might have been cheered up.

"I've never heard you insult Tamama before." Kululu pretended to look shocked, now fully tuning out Keroro's own jealousy.

Sure it was funny, but that wasn't why he had arranged this situation.

"You don't have a problem with me and Tamama, do you?" Kululu asked, faking confusion. "I mean...we're just hanging out. Trust me, everything I do with Tamama is the same thing that I do with you. It's nothing odd."

"A-all the same stuff?" Mois covered her mouth in surprise. Now she did a little frustrated, but she desperately tried to hide it. "Umm...O-of course I don't have a problem with it. It's just...Tamama." She tried to figure out a reason.

"Tamama?" Kululu asked, waiting for more information. He was smiling despite himself.

"Well, I worry about you is all!" Mois was trying to desperately pull at straws, "I mean Tamama's kinda...he threatened to cut me today!" She pointed out.

"I didn't know you noticed that." Kululu frowned. It seemed Mois was observant and not in denial about Tamama's more violent tendencies when it was necessary to her. He would have to look more into that.

"He's kinda dangerous." Mois nodded, going with that story. "So it's just...so weird that you two are so close. It...It doesn't sound good for you."

"Are you suggesting that I stop hanging out with Tamama?" Kululu looked fake shocked. "Gasp!"

"Well, I'm not s-saying you have to, but maybe it would be best for you?" Angol Mois tried to persuade.

"Yeah! Stop spending time with him!" Keroro agreed now fully pulled into this lie and fake story.

Giroro polished his gun in the corner and frowned. Mois and Keroro seemed oblivious to it, but Giroro could easily see Kululu's evil smile. He knew that look. It was the look of Kululu getting exactly what he wanted and everything going according to plan.

 _He's...He's pulling a prank...On both of them!_ Giroro realized. Kululu was cruel. And he seemed to be fully enjoying their suffering.

That was Kululu, Giroro wouldn't be exaggerating to call him his enemy. _He enjoys people's suffering. And he's always been gunning for Mois's._ Giroro remembered.

Sure Kululu's 'date' had confused him a little. But Giroro knew one truth. _Kululu doesn't have feelings._ Giroro reminded himself. _He's got some evil plan going on behind the scenes. Perhaps he's trying to get Mois to actually like him just so he can shatter her heart._ He could imagine Kululu laughing a lot about that.

Kululu was cruel. And Giroro tried to stand up to stop all this.

"W-what, you think it would be best for me?" Kululu looked side to side, over-dramatically shocked. "Wait...Mois, do you want me to stop hanging out with Tamama? Stop...doing the same sort of things we do with Tamama?" He asked.

"No!" Mois tried to insist, "That's not what I meant. I wouldn't want you to lose a friend."

Kululu frowned, "Well, touching someone's cheek and caressing it isn't particularly friendly is it?" Kululu said under his breath.

Mois tried to figure out what to say next, "I just mean there's like...Look there's stuff that we do and like stuff with Tamama, and some of those things I don't think Tamama w-would like, if that makes sense?"

"Ah, so you don't think Tamama would like being called cute!" Kululu snapped his fingers, "But he calls himself cute all the time!"

Mois frowned and rubbed her head. Kululu was right. Tamama liked anyone calling him cute.

"Or do you just want me to call you cute? Aww, Mois I had no idea." Kululu teased.

"I just mean, umm...well I had no idea you two were s-so close and um.." Now Mois was stuttering, "It's just not a good idea and you know!" She was losing words.

"Yeah! It's not really good for either of you!" Keroro crossed his arms. "You two should break up. As...hang out buddies? Dating? Idk what you're doing with Tamama."

Giroro sighed. "You two do know he's lying right?"

Angol Mois's stuttering and spurting stopped and she looked at Giroro. Keroro's eyes widened too.

"Ku, ku, ku." Kululu chuckled.

"Wait, you were lying!?" Keroro asked.

"But I thought Uncle said he saw it!" Mois pointed out.

"Eh, I just played along with his lie." Kululu shrugged. "But nobody likes a joke ruiner, Giroro." He frowned.

Keroro crossed his arms. "I knew you were lying. I mean I was in on it, and I wouldn't get...like caught up in my own lie." Keroro lied.

"You and Tamama...Don't...Hang out like we do?" Angol Mois asked a little confused. "Oh! Umm...Sorry for assuming you two were so close."

"It's all right." Kululu smirked in that evil sort of way, and walked over to Mois. "It was cute how jealous you were. Funny to watch."

"That's mean." Mois frowned. "And I wasn't...Jealous. I was just confused, she insisted."

"Oh? Then you'd be fine if I started hanging out with Tamama like that?" Kululu asked again looking up at her.

What he loved best about this was that she didn't look back, making eye contact with him.

"N-no! I mean, I have no control over that sort of thing, Kululu." Mois shook her head. Then she stared for a second. "Wait...Are you teasing me again?"

"Yep! And yet again I'd like to repeat how adorable you are. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu laughed. "Don't worry, Mois, you're the cute one." He reassured.

Mois blushed deeply that she had in fact gotten jealous, and that Kululu complimenting her was making her happy.

 _Ku. I suppose I've learned a few things from using Keroro as my pawn._ Kululu decided, just grinning at Mois. _First off, Mois wants our relationship to be interestingly enough, exclusive. Which leads to the evidence that she does want us to be dating. She gets jealous when I call other people cute._ All strong evidence to the fact that she really wanted their relationship to be dates, verses just hanging out.

It was all good stuff to write down later.

Mois bent down to talk to Kululu more and scold him for teasing her and Kululu just pat her head and teased her more. "You're the only toxicatingly cute person I know. Happy now?" He tried to reassure

Angol Mois gave a small nod.

"They are literally flirting right in front of us." Keroro gestured with his hand. "Am I really still the only one who sees they're interested in each other?"

"Yep." Giroro nodded. "He's teasing her. He's being mean." He insisted.

Dororo nodded.

Keroro groaned.

* * *

Angol Mois herself was still very unsure about where things stood between her and Kululu.

 _Okay. So he tried to make me jealous today._ That meant that there was a chance that they were together, and that Kululu thought that she knew that.

 _But...If we are together than..._ Why had Kululu reacted with boredom when Keroro had flirted with her? Why had he said 'it was about time.' why did he seem to just accept the fact that Keroro and Mois would date as fact?

If she was dating Kululu, then Kululu wouldn't have had that sort of reaction. He wouldn't have liked the fact that Keroro was flirting with her. And that really confused her.

 _It was the first time Uncle showed any interest in me, but..._ She couldn't keep it out of her head the fact that she might already be in a relationship. And it was so confusing because she didn't know.

 _I need to just be direct and honest._ She decided. That was what she was known for. She just had to ask Kululu if they were dating.

On their latest movie/date/hang out session, she tried to get a chance to ask the question after the movie.

"Okay, so we saw a romance movie this time, but as decided I get to decide the next movie. Ku, ku, ku. Cuz taking turns is 'equal' or something like that." Kululu shrugged, walking with her back home.

"H-hey, um… K-kululu?" Angol Mois asked.

"Hm?" Kululu glanced up at her. He pulled his hand away from her. _And I had just started touching it. But I guess that might be a little weird._ He had tried to get some sort of reaction from holding her hand as they walked home together.

But she probably wasn't happy with that. He still didn't know if they were together or not after all.

"Um...A-are we dat-" She closed her mouth. She couldn't do it. It was hard to ask. _If we are dating I might be stupid for not knowing. If we aren't I might be delusional._

It was a bad situation either way, and for once she couldn't approach a situation with honesty. The whole thing made her feel embarassed and awkward.

"What do you think of me and Uncle?" She finally asked. _Hopefully this will determine if we're together or not._

After all if they were dating, Kululu obviously wouldn't like the idea of Mois's crush on Keroro, or her and Keroro.

Kululu groaned. _Well this is worse than her asking me to get my hand off her._ This was just normal Mois stuff, always talking about Keroro no matter what situation they were in.

1000 other Keroro memories popped up. And they were all annoying.

 _Groaning. That's a good sign._ Mois decided.

"I don't think much about you and the captain. I have my own life after all." Kululu responded, "So I can't answer for you if you two are a perfect couple or something. I keep telling you this, Mois." He frowned.

Mois frowned. _He's...Giving the same answer that he usually gives me._ She had asked him about Keroro a 1000 other times after all. And his answer was just normal Kululu stuff.

It was nothing like 'oh Mois you don't still like him right, I mean you and I are dating?' or 'I hate the two of you together.'

Mois couldn't figure out what 'I have my own life' meant. Did that mean she wasn't a part of that life? Or was it just his neutral bored statement?

His answer didn't help sort things out for her at all. _So I'm back to not knowing if we're going out or not._ It could be a fling too and that was why Kululu just didn't care about her and Keroro.

She had no idea what it was. And personally she tried to hope that she didn't know what she was rooting for too.

* * *

 **I hope I did okay, I'm trying my best to not ignore Keroro.**

 **Please review**


	6. Blackmail

**I'm trying to incorporate and use more characters successfully like Natsumi and Tamama. Tamama hasn't had enough time in this fic.**

* * *

"He doesn't have feelings." Giroro tried to keep telling Keroro, "It's impossible for him to be together with Mois because he just doesn't have the capacity to feel anything positive."

Keroro rolled his eyes. He always thought Giroro was a little over-dramatic about Kululu. He never did get it why Giroro thought Kululu was so immoral. Was it the thousands of experiments Kululu had done to Giroro? The harassment? What was it?

"He does too have feelings!" Keroro insisted. "Being a jerk doesn't make it so you can't date someone."

"Yes it does." Dororo piped in. He hoped people didn't want to date jerks.

Keroro sighed. Giroro and Dororo were really touchy on this jerk subject. "I'll prove it. I'll prove he has feelings."

Giroro rolled his eyes. "Yeah, cuz you're doing so good proving that Kululu likes Mois, might as well prove something else." He said sarcastically.

Keroro didn't notice the sarcasm. "I'm sure if Mois is peril, Kululu will show that he has feelings! He'll show sympathy, empathy all those things I've never seen Kululu ever do!"

"...Peril? Keroro...You aren't thinking of some...dangerous thing are you?" Dororo asked worriedly.

Keroro smiled. "No worries! I'll just pick on Mois a little! It's harmless. Teasing. I'm really good at picking on people."

"We know." Both Dororo and Giroro said looking glum.

Keroro rubbed his hands together. He had a plan now! Get Kululu to defend Mois, and show that he had feelings! It would be easy.

* * *

Giroro sat by his tent, waiting for Kululu to be around. He made the signal with his hand when Kululu seemed to be in the living room, making fun of how Natsumi was chopping vegetables or something.

Angol Mois was in the yard folding laundry, Keroro was watching her carefully waiting for the moment when he had to pick on her.

"Hyah!" Keroro hit all the clean laundry on the ground.

"Tamama! I just did all that." Angol Mois sighed. Then she saw that the frog before her was not Tamama as usual. "U-uncle?" She stuttered, "Um….Were you playing a little too wildly?" Making Mois repeat a task over and over again seemed to be a more Tamama thing than Keroro.

"Nope! I just think you need to do it again. I mean you did it really badly." Keroro tried to channel his inner Tamama to be mean. He had no idea what to say after all. He crossed his arms and looked sternly.

"I'm...I'm sorry, Uncle! I'll try again and do better next time!" Angol Mois apologized and tried to keep herself optimistic.

Keroro shook his head. "I don't know if you can do it better next time. I mean someone else could, but you? You're so bad at everything. I mean you can't even destroy the planet properly."

"I could try again." Angol Mois offered.

Giroro shook his head at Keroro realizing that she wasn't talking about the laundry.

Keroro winced. "No. I don't think you should." He told her, "I mean...destroying the planet? When there's so many good things about it? You do know pekopon is the only place where gundam exists? What kind of monster destroys the home of gundam models?"

"Um...Uncle I don't know if you're insulting me or like...talking about your love of gundam. Once gundam gets in the sentence I honestly can't tell." Angol Mois seemed to know by Keroro's tone that he was trying to be mean, but...she wanted to help him anyway. She tried to lead him in a better direction. That was her job after all, to help Keroro.

Keroro frowned. _She's impenetrable! Kululu won't come to her rescue unless I make her cry._ "Uhh..." He didn't know what Angol Mois cared about though, to insult her to the best of his abilities. "You suck."

"There you go, Uncle!" Angol Mois clapped. "Are you practicing for verbal sparring with Natsumi?" She asked.

Keroro shook his head. _Does...She not really get that I'm insulting her?_ No wonder she annoyed Tamama and Kululu so much. No matter how hard they tried to be mean it just bounced off.

"You know...You're kinda creepy, aren't you?" Keroro tried again trying to be meaner. "I mean always hanging around me and doing everything I say. Do you not have your own life? Why are you so willess and spineless? Are you just so desperate to have someone, anyone, care about you?"

Angol Mois frowned. "That's...A little harsh, Uncle. I mean you don't really think that, do you..?" She laughed nervously. "...S-should I stop doing your chores? Would you...Like me better than?"

"No!" Keroro said quickly. _Wrong tactic! I was too harsh and too on point._ Perhaps Mois shouldn't realize that. He liked their relationship as it was. It didn't need to change at all.

"Um...Uhh..." Keroro shuffled his feet.

"Planet." Giroro suggested.

"Oh! I bet anyone could destroy the planet better than you! Heck, Tamama would be a better lord of terror. He's more terrifiying. And your technique..It's just not that good."

This got Angol Mois angry. "Take that back! I'm a great planet destroyer!" She yelled.

This caused Natsumi and Kululu to look over.

"Nope, you don't have any of the grace of a planet destroyer. Seen Sailor Moon? Sailor Saturn is like...way better than you. She's more threatening. People actually care that that's her job. Nobody cares about your occupation." Keroro pointed out.

Angol Mois's eyes widened. "No! No! That can't be true!" She screamed.

"Planet destroying isn't that cool anyway." Keroro sighed. "It's kind of a boring, old skill, isn't it?"

Angol Mois just shook her head, covering her mouth, muffled sobs coming out of her. This slander was painful! "It is too cool!"

"No. It isn't." Keroro told her curtly. He looked over at Kululu to see if he was interested in what he was saying.

Kululu did look personally insulted.

 _Crap. This sort of insult might work too well towards Kululu. It might prove he doesn't have feelings because he doesn't care that Mois's crying he cares about the destruction!_ He had to get more personal than planet destroying.

"Also, you're ugly. And like nobody would ever date you." Keroro said quickly trying to finish off his insults.

He heard knuckles cracking behind him.

 _Yes! Kululu came! Take that Giroro! ...Also sorry Mois._ Keroro thought at an after thought. Mois looked like she was crying quite a bit now.

Keroro smiled as he looked behind him. But what he saw was not Kululu. It was Natsumi.

"How dare you be so mean to Mois!" Natsumi looked furious. "Especially when she's been so nice to you. No one should say something like that to someone. I mean I knew you were mean, but what the heck?"

"...It's all right, Natsumi." Mois sniffled. "I'm sure it's just a plan for invasion. Uncle's always smart. It must have something to do with something. He was...probably lying."

"That's worse! You shouldn't use Mois's feelings as your pawn." Natsumi reached down and Keroro could feel the anger radiating off of her.

"Mois! Help!" Keroro begged.

"Sorry Uncle, I can't do anything." Angol Mois apologized. "After all I'm not that great of a planet destroyer." She repeated. "So I can't protect you. You could say, karma?" She was smiling a bit now.

"Lady Natsumi you have to listen, I didn't mean any of it." Keroro shivered. "I was just trying to help Mois with her relationships!" Keroro tried to defend. "I was trying to get a reaction out of Kululu not you!"

Natsumi didn't listen to anything he said. Instead she picked him up by the head and drop kicked him over the house like he deserved.

"That's what happens when your plans blow up in your face." Giroro smirked, and polished his gun.

But Natsumi's anger wasn't over. She stepped in front of Mois and glared at Giroro. "And what about you? You were right here for this whole thing and you didn't stop him once! You just watched this whole thing like some crummy bystander!"

Giroro's eyes widened. Natsumi...Was mad at him? She was disappointed in him. _She's right you know._ Giroro's eyes got all watery. "N-natsumi, I had no idea it would go so far-"

Natsumi winced. That was the wrong thing to say. "I can't believe you, Giroro. I thought you were better than this. But you really are just one of the frogs. And what's worse you don't seem to care how Mois feels! You're more worried about my anger!"

Giroro frowned. Well, she was right. And now he felt kind of bad about it. "Mois, everything he said was a lie. Don't worry about it. Keroro was just being over dramatic-"

Natsumi crossed her arms like it was too late. She didn't beat him up, but her glare was enough to break Giroro's heart.

"I'm so sorry! I was awful!" Giroro threw himself on the ground, apologizing a lot.

"That's better." Natsumi smirked. Giroro was easy to beat and handle. She pat Angol Mois on the shoulder.

But behind them they heard laughter, Kululu's laughter. "Ku, ku, ku! Can't believe it! You got disciplined by Natsumi again!" Kululu walked over to Giroro to mock him. "You weren't even a part of that and you still did wrong. And now you're bowing and apologizing. How pathetic! Ku, ku, ku."

Kululu was interested in this whole thing, not because of Mois, but because Giroro got Natsumi angry at him again through barely any action of his own. He loved Giroro's love story failing.

And Kululu laughed loudly.

Giroro picked himself off the ground and glared. It was like Natsumi and Angol Mois weren't even there anymore. All that mattered was a jerk was in front of him, mocking his pain.

"Natsumi's right that I shouldn't have gone along with this at all! I mean I knew for a fact it wasn't going to work. You weren't going to show any feelings!" Giroro yelled.

"Oh?" Kululu asked. So this plan had been focused on him and Mois's relationship again? _Typical captain._

"So the stupid frog was telling the truth about trying to get Kululu's reaction." Natsumi muttered.

Mois looked a little confused.

"Ku, well that plan went great for me then. It blew up in your face like everything does. Even if it doesn't have anything to do with you, Giroro, it usually hurts you. That's one of the greatest things about you. It's always a riot to watch you suffer. Ku, ku, ku!" Kululu laughed.

Giroro grabbed Kululu by the skin on his chest and lifted him up in anger. "Keroro is so wrong about you. You don't have any feelings in you! You just like laughing at other people's real pain!"

"Guilty." Kululu smiled.

Giroro looked like he wanted to tear Kululu to pieces. "You don't like Mois at all!" Giroro accused

Kululu shrugged, like there was really no threat from Giroro lifting him off the ground. He wasn't even going to respond to that one. He was still smiling and looking at Natsumi and Mois as if to communicate that Giroro was being an over-dramatic baby.

"Mois doesn't like you either. In fact I don't think she could! She's a nice person and all, but she's not that nice." Giroro yelled in anger, letting all his thoughts out.

Kululu just continued laughing as Giroro's feelings burst out in front of everyone.

"Hell, nobody could like you! Who would like someone who lacks the ability to feel any sort of compassion, sympathy or even empathy?" Giroro asked. "You're an unfeeling monster and anyone who can't see that is an idiot." He got more deep, his voice sounding like a razor as if it was ripping Kululu apart.

Kululu stopped laughing to frown and glare. _That...That is true too._ But for some reason that truth hurt a tiny bit more. "At least I'm not chasing a dream that's bound to blow up and never be achieved. Just like your Natsumi thing-" Kululu smirked.

Giroro covered Kululu's mouth and punched him. Natsumi was right there! But he felt himself shaking in anger because Kululu was right.

"You're a jerk." He said one last time.

"Guilty." Kululu smirked again as Giroro punched him in the face a second time.

He was a jerk. A jerk without feelings.

* * *

For some reason the words Giroro had said were still ringing around in Kululu's head. More so than Giroro's punches (he was very used to those)

 _Nobody could like you..._ Kululu remembered what Giroro had said. _Because I lack compassion in any sort of form._

He hadn't realized that the line would bother him, or be jumping around his head. But it was true. He didn't really have compassion. And that was a basic thing that most people liked.

And if there was one thing Kululu understood a little about himself but didn't care to admit, it was that deep down he was lonely. He liked validation, he liked people paying attention to him. Not too much of it of course, but he did still enjoy it somewhat.

So things like what Giroro said like that nobody would like him, did sort of hurt. It was true of course, but it was a harsh reminder of how the world really felt about him.

Kululu could try to distract himself as much as he could with other people's pain but at the end of the day it would always come back to the fact that he was an unfeeling jerk that people didn't really like.

 _Hmm...He's right. Why have I been analyzing the idea of Mois possibly liking or dating me when it seems near impossible?_ She was just a little dense, and extremely gullible. If someone told her she was dating Kululu, like Keroro kept telling her, she would believe it in an instance. That was just the way Mois was.

It didn't really have anything to do with feelings. Because Mois didn't have any towards him. That was why none of his romantic moves worked. Mois just thought they might be dating from Keroro telling her that.

That's what Kululu told himself, feeling a little peace at figuring out the puzzle. It didn't make him feel happier, but it felt like the truth.

 _I don't need to hang out anymore with her._ He told himself, sitting across from as she ate some ice cream at the cafe they were at.

Despite that, he was hanging out with her again in their sort of date like fashion. _Ugh. Why do I do this? I've figured out the puzzle. I can add it to my document now._ He told himself. _She's just gullible. That's why we're in this situation._ Despite that he had still invited her out again. Perhaps it was that time with Mois filled a certain hole inside of him, he liked feeling slightly special by the delusion that they were doing something special.

She was a very attentive person after all. One of the scary things about her that frustrated him was that she always tricked his mind into thinking happy things like that she actually cared about what he was doing.

 _She's scary for a lot more reasons than that. Like her eyes trying to make me innocent._ That was why she needed to be analyzed, so Kululu could figure it out.

As he watched Angol Mois lick at her ice cream and smile at him, he decided to ask her one of the questions that had been bothering him that day. Someone as compassionate and kind as her would have an answer.

"Do you not dislike the fact that I don't have any compassion or empathy?" Kululu finally asked, hoping she'd be honest with him.

Mois stopped looking at her ice cream. "Is...Is this about what Giroro said today?" _I wasn't aware he was still thinking about that._ She didn't really think any insult shook Kululu. It was kind of the reason she could easily stop thinking about what people like usually Tamama said to her. Because if Kululu could shake things off she could too.

"I was just curious." Kululu pretended he wasn't that interested. It looked clear that he was thinking deeply about this question though, and his face was covered in worry. "To be clear I'm not asking this so you can change me into a good person! Ick! I know your eyes are gunning to turn me all innocent. But I don't want to be good. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu said quickly scooting away in fear.

Mois chuckled for a second, because for a moment Kululu seemed more focused on his incredibly odd fear of turning good. "I don't think you have a lack of compassion."

"Oh no, I definitely do." Kululu responded. "You don't have to lie."

Mois shook her head. "But you do have compassion." Mois pointed out. "You're quite nice to me. And compassionate. If Natsumi hadn't come to my rescue I'm sure you would have. After all you say my tears are much to sparkly to deal with." She smiled.

Kululu frowned deeply. That was true. He would have come to help out to make fun of Keroro if Natsumi wasn't obviously going to go to Mois's rescue. He had just thought that since someone else was going to help out there was no need for him. "Oh no! Do I have compassion?" Kululu shivered. "God, you've been effecting me on a level I didn't even predict. The subconscious level." He was terrified.

Kululu shivered in his chair. He was no longer as worried about what Giroro had said. Now what Mois was saying was scaring him much more. _Crap! Mois's changing me faster than I can analyze her and figure out how she's doing this. She's right. I've...I've got that compassion thing now. Augh! I need to get rid of it quickly!_ His glasses were cracking, he looked near panic.

Angol Mois leaned her head on her palm, sighing. _I guess Kululu didn't want to hear that._ Maybe he had wanted a different sort of answer that would make him feel better? "For...A more real answer though, Kululu, I think Giroro was wrong."

"I know you think that!" Kululu looked terrified. "You think I have compassion. Ugh. Gross."

"No, I mean he was wrong about nobody ever liking you. I like you plenty after all." Mois pointed out.

Kululu still looked frightened. "Yeah! Because you're under the wrong impression that I'm...Nice." He looked like he was going to puke.

Mois tried not to chuckle. "It's not just that." She tried to reason with him. "I don't care about your lack of relating to people, and your lack of empathy. I don't care about your confusing outlook on life, Kululu." Mois told him. "I care about you as a person, and your interests not about how great you can sympathize with people."

Kululu snapped out of his fright to look at her quite confused. It was a real answer it wasn't giving him qualities that he didn't have, and it did make him feel a little better, especially when Mois said she cared about him as a person. "But...Nobody in their right mind doesn't care that someone lacks empathy." He pointed out, trying to respond logically.

"I don't care that you lack empathy." Mois reassured. "Relating to people is confusing."

Kululu scoffed. "Sure it is. You do great at it." He paused. "Why don't you care?" He asked curiously.

"Sometimes I feel like that too." Mois responded, "I'm a planet destroyer after all. You people...Were never supposed to be actual people to me. The pekoponians here are basically just mosquitoes. So...I have to really remind myself to treat people like people. I'm getting better at it, sure, and it's coming about more naturally, but I still have to remind myself every now and then. So I can understand not being able to relate to people." Mois smiled, "And I really don't care that it's difficult to you."

Kululu frowned again. _Well...You're….being empathetic right now with me._ She seemed to be relating to him very well so he couldn't particularly fully believe her. He couldn't believe that being kind and compassionate didn't come naturally to Mois. But it was an interesting insight and something he hadn't particularly seen before.

It was very sweet. Mois was just waiting patiently for his response. _Maybe...Maybe Giroro was wrong. If...If anyone wouldn't care it would be Mois. She's right._

Maybe Giroro was wrong about a lot of things. Maybe he was wrong too. Maybe Mois did actually like him. He could hear the sickening honesty in her voice. She honestly didn't care. And that melted his insides.

She could understand that. She didn't think it was a problem. The worries seemed to sink out of his soul, and the mystery of his and Mois's relationship didn't replace it, it just felt like it didn't matter in the moment. Whatever he and Mois were he was happy to have her here with him right now talking to him.

He felt….happy. He felt happy to be with her in her presence. And he smiled despite himself. He reached over and stroked her cheek. He didn't know why. He just wanted to touch her. To be in the present.

"Thanks." He said quietly about to pull away from touching her gently.

Angol Mois smiled and leaned into his hand. She put her hand over his as if to tell him to stay. She closed her eyes and just smiled in the moment.

Kululu's heart leaped. It felt weird, and a feeling that he usually was terrified by. But right now wasn't a moment for fear. It was just quiet and comfortable. He climbed onto the table to be a little closer to her, because her pressing his hand against her cheek just felt so darn good.

Her eyes were closed and Kululu wondered briefly if that was for his sake because she knew he needed a moment of comfort. _It's sweet._ She really was cute.

He looked at her like she was the only thing there. At least she was the only thing that mattered right now. He reached forward wondering if he could do anything more. He decided to put his other hand on top of her hand, entwining their fingers a little.

Mois smiled. It was a comfortable feeling of just holding hands. She tried to open her eyes because she wanted to see Kululu too, but decided to close her eyes immediately again because she could see Kululu starting to tremble again when she looked at him.

She wanted Kululu to relax so she moved her head forward, perhaps to place her forehead against his. Just so they could be close, and perhaps Kululu could feel like she wasn't going to jump him or terrify him. Just so he could understand the moment was just them.

 _Wait, she's moving forward. Are we going to..._ Kululu could feel himself breathing heavier. People who moved their faces forward usually meant they were going to kiss. And in this moment he didn't really mind if they did.

If they were dating, they would be kissing after all. And a kiss certainly would indicate that their relationship was romantic.

Kululu could feel himself a little excited for the incoming smooch. He moved forward to to meet her, but accidentally just hit her nose since they were going for two different things. Their noses nudged against each other in a cute way. Mois rubbed her nose against his in an eskimo kiss and giggled.

Kululu could feel himself blush a lot. _This is way too cute and innocent for me._ He felt like dying. But he didn't mind eskimo kissing Mois.

He was with his maybe gf. And this was a relaxing moment.

 _CLICK!_ There was a loud noise that got them to pull apart instantly. It had sounded like a camera.

 _Oh no. Keroro couldn't have been stalking us now could he?_ Kululu would like to think that he was smart enough to recognize Keroro's presence, forgetting that Dororo could mask it with his lack of a presence.

"I did it! Now he'll include me in his team! I've gotten the proof that he kept talking about to Giroro and Dororo but not me! And now that woman can't date Mr. Sergeant!" Tamama jumped up and down.

Kululu looked down. Tamama had been there? And he just hadn't noticed? _Oh no. This is somehow worse._ Because Tamama wasn't as delusioned as Keroro. And Tamama was on the hunt to get rid of Angol Mois in anyway he could.

"T-Tamama." Angol Mois blushed realizing that Tamama had been watching. "W-what...What are you doing here?"

"Well originally I was here for the ice cream." Tamama admitted.

 _Dang. I forgot the obvious. That Tamama might be at a cafe just randomly for ice cream._ Kululu mentally kicked himself.

"But then I saw you two and decided to snap an incriminating picture! After all I've overheard and managed to figure out that Mr. Sergeant thinks you two are together. And if that can be proved to him that means he'll never be able to date you." He pointed at Mois in glee, his broken heart miraculously healing.

"Just normal delusional Tamama stuff then-" Kululu tried to shrug it off and what Tamama had seen.

"Mr. Sergeant didn't invite me into his group." Tamama was ignoring Kululu and instead blabbing to himself. "Apparently it's a childhood friends things only or maybe he just doesn't want to tell me because he doesn't think I'd believe him! But now he'll have to let me in and let me work with him! Because I have real proof." The picture came out of his camera. "You two really are dating! This is great for my love story!"

"We're not dating." Mois and Kululu both said at the same time. They looked at each other briefly, because that wasn't exactly true. But it seemed they both knew Tamama thinking that was a bad idea.

"Listen. I know you don't want Mr. Sergeant to know about this though." Tamama's grin spread, gleefully, It looked like he was all grin and nothing else. A black hole of despair. "Maybe you want your privacy in your relationship, or maybe you don't want him to break up your little budding romance. So I'm willing to...Not give him this picture. For a price at least."

"Something about someone acting sinister and not...doing your laugh sounds wrong. You could say role reversal?" Mois shook her head.

Kululu nodded in agreement. Was Tamama trying to act like him? "You trying to blackmail us?" He was just so confused by this situation.

"Yeah!" Tamama said enthusiastically slipping out of his cool sinister composure. "Blackmailing that woman's been a dream of mine."

"Tamama...If you want to blackmail someone you have to have terms. What do you want?" Angol Mois reminded, trying to be helpful.

Tamama moaned. "Stop trying to be all nice! I caught you in an incriminating situation!"

"You really didn't." Mois shook her head. "Kululu and I were just talking. I don't see how this is blackmail."

Tamama groaned. "Look! Look! This is like….Totally blackmail and embarrassing!" He handed them a copy of the picture.

In the picture Kululu and Mois looked close to actually kissing, but they were mostly eskimo kissing and holding each other's hands in quite an intimate way. Tamama was right that it looked extremely romantic because they both seemed quite happy and completely enamored with each other.

 _Crap._ Kululu thought to himself. It...It did look pretty romantic. Tamama was right.

"It looks like you want to suck each other's faces!" Tamama said bluntly.

"W-we do not! We're just..Umm-" Angol Mois tried to think of some excuse but she was blushing quite a bit because she realized what the picture looked like too.

 _He's right. If he hadn't butted in I can't say for sure that we wouldn't have been making out or something._ In that moment Kululu couldn't fully say that he wouldn't do that. In fact that had gone through his head quite a bit. _Darn. We would have._ Kululu sighed a bit to himself in disappointment. _Wait. No don't think that. You're dating her to analyze the fact that you're maybe dating her. Nothing deeper._

He tried not to think about how weird that was and how that didn't make any sense.

Tamama ignored Mois's denial. "Anyway, I want a few things. A pile of candy for my troubles, that woman to spend less time with Mr. Sergeant and for both of you to be called upon at any time. For example if I want a foot massage I will get a foot massage, and if I want a machine to make me commander of Momoka, I'll get it-" Tamama was blabbing.

Kululu stared. Tamama really was trying to blackmail him. _Me! He's trying to blackmail me! The king of blackmail._ This was both stupid and a situation that he had never ever seen himself in.

"Also I want that woman to step on 1000 lego pieces." Tamama was getting into the list of mean revenge to Mois. "No 2000! In her bare feet! It's going to hurt a lot! And they'll be tiny lego pieces!"

Kululu sighed. _And he's trying to use this blackmail against Mois._ He wondered if Mois was going to agree with it. She seemed still focused on the idea that her and Kululu were going to suck faces, she was stuttering and not listening to Tamama.

There was one thing Kululu realized and that was that Mois was unfortunately right that he was nice in some way to her. And he didn't want to see Tamama think that he could be mean to Mois. Seeing Tamama with power was pathetic.

"Hey, Tamama." Kululu crossed his arms. "Ku, ku, ku. It's funny how you think you can blackmail me of all people."

Tamama swallowed. "What do you mean?"

"Well I have all the blackmail for you for your entire life. When you were three you thought you could rob a candy store and stole some skittles and blamed it on Taruru. To this day the candy store and Taruru do not know. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu pointed out.

Tamama turned white.

"Let me tell you about all your very nsfw Keroro fantasies that I haven't even looked for, I just found you accidentally ranting on. Of course I video recorded them to give to Keroro at a later point." Kululu raised an eyebrow.

Tamama started waving his hands. "Fine! I'll only blackmail that woman! It...It was a mistake to drag you into this, Kululu."

"Not her either." Kululu shook his head. "Let me continue about the file I've memorized that I own labeled 'Tamama'. There was a gundam that you thought Keroro liked more than you. You stuck it behind the laundry. He thinks that the gundam model was somehow kidnapped by aliens to this day. Would you like me to tell him what really happened?"

"No! No!" Tamama shrieked. "Please stop talking!"

"You licked five of Momoka's slices of cake but decided they weren't good so you just left them there for someone else to eat." Kululu continued. "Imagine how mad she would be. Ku, ku, ku."

Tamama threw himself on the ground. "Fine! Fine! I get it! You have more blackmail on me! Just...Just don't tell them."

"I am the person who knows the most about the humiliating moments of your life. Ku, ku, ku. All your secrets. So...Don't try to cross me." Kululu reached out. "Hand me the camera and picture and maybe, maybe, Giroro won't know about the time you hid your carrots in his guns."

Tamama squeaked. He'd be dead if Giroro knew! Terrified, he handed Kululu the camera and picture.

"Say anything to anyone, even by accident and the captain will learn everything. Every bad thing you ever did. Ku, ku, ku. Remember." Kululu grinned.

Tamama screamed. "AHHH!" This was his nightmare. Blackmailing Kululu was a no win situation. Kululu was just more powerful and had less to lose. He had less blackmail.

He wanted to say one last mean thing to Mois but with Kululu standing next to her Tamama knew there was no chance. He just ran for his life and away.

"Bye Tamama." Mois waved, finally cluing back into the conversation.

Tamama probably wasn't going to try that again for a while.

* * *

"Did he actually have blackmail on us?" Mois finally asked when they were walking back to the Hinata house. She was still wondering about it.

"Ku, nah. I just didn't like the idea of anyone thinking they even could blackmail me. Letting Tamama even think he has power is a bad idea." Kululu responded easily.

"But..." Mois frowned. It sure looked like an incriminating picture and blackmail-y. But it couldn't have been blackmail if it wasn't something embarrassing. "If we weren't dating would that picture be blackmail?" Angol Mois wondered aloud.

Kululu looked confused. Did...she confirm that they were dating? _No, she's asking a question. The claim that I'm making is the picture wasn't blackmail. The claim we both made to Tamama was that we weren't dating. But she doesn't seem to believe that because in the picture it really does look like we're together._

And that was fine for her to think, but as she looked at him, Kululu realized that she actually wanted to have a conversation about it. If they were dating or not and if that picture was blackmail.

Instead of reacting smartly, Kululu panicked at the idea of communicating. "Well, if I'm dating you, you're dating me, so there!" It was a pretty dumb thing to say, like a gotcha, like he had nabbed her in some sort of trap.

"Huh?" Angol Mois asked. That didn't make any sense. Of course if they were dating they would be dating. _I don't get it. Is he turning my question into a competition?_

It didn't sound like Kululu knew if they were dating or not either. And it sounded like he didn't want to be the one to admit that they were dating or something stupid like that.

It just confused Mois even more about their relationship.

She'd figure it all out eventually. At least she hoped.

* * *

 **I can imagine Tamama trying to get Angol Mois to step on legos very easily.**

 **Please review!**


	7. Spin the Bottle

**Sorry I wanted the beginning of this chapter to be full on comedy goodness and just fun, but I put some drama in at the end. It'll get resolved next chapter.**

* * *

"Spin the bottle!" Keroro shouted all of a sudden, half asleep.

"What?" Giroro asked. What Keroro was suggesting was so random.

"We'll get Kululu and Mois to play spin the bottle together, and when they kiss they'll be just so into it that it'll prove that they like each other!" Keroro still seemed to be on board with the plan to get them together.

Dororo sighed. "Keroro...That won't work." He just shook his head. "First of all how are you going to get them to play spin the bottle?"

"Well, we'll just say we're trying to understand pekoponian customs or have fun. We'll invite everyone like Momoka, Fuyuki, Natsumi-"

"Dororo! This plan is glorious. Stop stepping on Keroro's good ideas." Giroro scolded immediately on board once the idea of playing spin the bottle with Natsumi was in the air. He was blushing a lot from the idea.

"But won't we have to kiss people too if we play spin the bottle?" Dororo reminded.

Keroro shrugged. "Why should that bother you? You're wearing a permanent mask." Keroro pointed out.

Dororo's eyes widened. Keroro was right! He was immune to this plan.

He still wasn't sure how everybody else would agree to this though.

* * *

It turned out to be incredibly easy to get them to agree to play spin the bottle. Everybody wanted to have a little fun and were in things for their own reasons, some of them to spend time with their friends, like Fuyuki, some of them to mess up a sweet game, like Kululu, and some people just wanted to kiss their crushes like most of those idiots.

Dororo was amazed at how easy it had all been and how willing everybody was to just play a game like this.

"So rules..Rules. We go around in the circle, I suppose and you don't have to lip lock, but you will if you aren't a coward, and you can pretty much kiss anywhere on the person." Keroro looked at everyone. "But you'll kiss the lips if you aren't a baby."

"But let me guess, you're going to be that baby who doesn't kiss anyone on the lips?" Natsumi asked.

"Yep! So have fun!" Keroro nodded happily.

Natsumi sighed. Keroro was just a coward who wouldn't play the game right.

And thus the game started, with the spinning of a bottle. It went about as well as a game of spin the bottle with Nishizaw laser guns pointed to a bottle could.

 _This game isn't really a normal game of spin the bottle. It's a war zone._ Giroro realized. There was one goal and one goal alone, sabotage everyone else. There was no such thing as a normal spin. Everything was spun at an insane rate.

"If anybody breaks the bottle they get kicked out though." Natsumi added quickly, her eyes wandering to Giroro who literally had a gun in his hand.

Giroro squeaked. _Ah so it's like...shooting the enemy but not killing the enemy!_ He could do that.

Everyone's eyes lit up, except Fuyuki who just wanted to have a good time. This was a battle of who could make the bottle end up a certain place.

* * *

The first spin was Saburo. "So we spinning this like normal people?" He looked around at the people with weapons around him. "Uhh no? I guess I better be cool about this too."

"Go Saburo! I'm sure you'll get someone nice." Natsumi squealed.

"Ku, ku, ku. Try not to get the numerous rotten eggs in this room." He pointed over at Keroro and most of his platoon mates, insulting them.

Saburo groaned. He pulled out his pen and drew a finger in the air, letting it appear to spin the bottle. As soon as the bottle was in play and spinning, Giroro, Kululu, and Natsumi all went to work.

Natsumi tried to blow a little on the bottle to arrange it in a certain way. The way a normal human being would cheat.

Giroro pulled out his gun to shoot it whenever it moved towards Natsumi, he had a keen eye. "You aren't stopping there!

"God this is all so weird." Saburo sighed

Kululu just pressed a button, "Ku, ku, ku." The bottle stopped immediately at Giroro.

"KULULU! That's cheating! You can't just press a button that makes it stop where you want!" Natsumi yelled.

"Why not?" Kululu asked. "I control the acceleration in the room. If you guys were smart enough to invent a machine like that then maybe you could cheat as well as I can. Ku, ku, ku."

"Yeah...I think...Next time you'll have to cheat a little less obviously..." Keroro told him. "But I guess the bottle still did stop at Giroro."

"No! No!" Giroro cried. "Not again! I don't want to kiss Saburo again. Kululu, why?"

"Kululu...Why?" Saburo looked at his friend with the face of pure betrayal.

"Ku, ku, ku. It was the thing you both wanted least." Kululu shrugged. "Now you going to kiss him?"

Saburo moved forward to kiss Giroro's cheek. He however tripped on the bottle, kissing Giroro directly on the lips.

Both of them froze and sobbed.

"One down." Kululu grinned.

* * *

The next up was Fuyuki. "This will be fun, guys! I hope you guys do that cool dramatic cheating thing you did for Saburo's though. That would be interesting." He spun the bottle.

Laser pointers pointed at it to force it to stop at Momoka specifically. However Fuyuki's spin was so weak that they couldn't stop it. It just moved right next to Natsumi.

"HIT IT AGAIN!" Momoka yelled.

"Nah, I think it stopped already. Aww man. Am I really that weak that nothing that abnormal can happen to my spin?" Fuyuki was completely disappointed.

He quickly kissed his sister on the cheek.

* * *

Next up was Koyuki. "Ninja arte, wind spin!" She yelled, spinning the bottle with a fancy ninja arte.

"Oooh!" Fuyuki clapped.

Giroro tried to keep his eyes on the bottle. He knew Koyuki was gunning for Natsumi, but the bottle eventually stopped at Dororo before he could modify it's tragectory.

"L-lady Koyuki! Was that on p-purpose-" Dororo blushed. "Oh well it must have been chance. Of course I'm willing to accept a kiss from you."

"Good! Now take off your mask because I don't want to be the loser that Keroro talked about." Koyuki declared.

Natsumi gasped. "So that was your plan!" She realized this was all a scheme to get Dororo's mask off.

Everybody's eyes widened. Koyuki was the smartest of them all. "MASK! MASK! MASK!" They all started chanting.

Dororo blushed deeply. And as his hands moved to remove his mask Koyuki's mouth drew closer to his. As his mask dropped Koyuki's face blocked everyone's view of Dororo's mouth forever with a kiss.

"Nooo." Keroro sobbed. "We didn't get to see it."

"It's all right." Giroro pat Keroro on the back. He was crying too. "There will be a chance next time."

* * *

It was finally Momoka's turn. She breathed deeply to channel her inner strength. "Anyone mess with my bottle and I will kill you myself!" She threatened looking at Keroro and Kululu.

Even Kululu nodded understanding how dangerous the situation was.

"Okay! I'm going to do a spin now!" Momoka smiled trying to be shy again. She spinned lightly and very carefully. She waited for the bottle to land on Fuyuki. It landed on Tamama. "NO!" She swatted the bottle again not letting it stay there for a moment.

It finally landed on Fuyuki.

"Uhh isn't that cheating?" Fuyuki asked.

"Doesn't matter." Keroro shivered. "I didn't see anything." He lied.

"I..I g-guess we have to kiss now. It's in the bottle's law." Momoka pointed out.

"Okay. I guess you're right." Fuyuki agreed.

Fuyuki was so beautiful. And as Momoka moved forward Kululu tripped her. Instead of kissing his lips like she was gunning for she lightly kissed his shoulder.

"Kululu! You got Momoka out of her kiss!" Keroro gasped "You're so dead!"

"Am I? Ku, ku, ku." Kululu asked. He pointed to Momoka.

Momoka was just in bliss. "My lips touched...Fuyuki's shoulder!" She seemed to be just focused on the fact that her lips had touched anywhere. She hadn't realized she didn't get what she wanted yet.

With Fuyuki it never was all or nothing.

* * *

It was finally Natsumi's turn. Natsumi spun the bottle, looking at Saburo. "Please bottle gods! I have been good." She prayed, and spun with all her might.

Giroro, Koyuki and Kululu all looked at the bottle. And suddenly an all out war happened over Natsumi's spin.

Giroro was shooting desperately around the bottle to get an end result, Koyuki was trying to control the wind, and Kululu was now controlling the ground pressing buttons to overly tilt it to not let it stop spinning.

It went on for 10 minutes of spinning, but eventually the bottle stopped despite all their work. Unfortunately it stopped on Keroro.

Tamama gasped. "Oh no."

Keroro gasped. "OH CRAP."

Giroro glared at Keroro wanting to murder him.

"Ugh. The worst possible option. All that for this?" Natsumi shook her head. "Um...Listen, stupid frog. I did intend to do the lips."

"Just kiss my hand like I'm some froggy prince." Keroro demanded.

"Yeah...I think that's for the best." Natsumi eyed Angol Mois and Tamama. She really didn't want to add herself to that drama.

She kissed his hand lightly.

* * *

Finally it was the frogs turn. Keroro went first.

"Spin!" He said with glee.

"Tamama impact!" Tamama tried to hit the ground to get the bottle to keep moving when it was closer to Angol Mois. However Tamama was not very smart, nor did he have any control so it didn't move to him like he wanted.

Instead the bottle ended at Saburo.

"Ku, ku, ku! Guess you really did get the metaphorical rotten egg!" Kululu mocked.

"Why...Why does nobody cool kiss me?" Saburo whined. "Kululu, you've gotta use your cheating to rig this or something for me. I'm running out of good options here. Literally only the worst people are kissing me."

"Well you got Tamama, Giroro, Dororo, and me left." Kululu pointed out. "Ku, ku, ku. I would consider all of those options the worst."

"No more Fuyuki?" Saburo frowned. "Aww man." He snapped his fingers, "Well what about Mo-"

"As I said you've only got those four options left. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu repeated, twitching a little. "I would suggest not finishing your sentence."

Saburo understood. Nothing would be rigged for him.

Keroro kissed Saburo lightly on the cheek. "Mwah!"

"If you really want I can get Giroro to kiss you again, or me. Those are both pretty bad, right?" Kululu asked.

"I don't want your help anymore." Saburo pleaded.

* * *

It was Kululu's turn. Finally. And Giroro, Dororo and Keroro all knew what they had to do. They had agreed to rig Kululu's bottle to get to Mois.

Luckily Dororo had ninja artes, and nothing could go wrong about Ninja artes!

Kululu touched the bottle lightly and spun it. Nobody noticed that as he touched the bottle he put a piece of very sticky gum on the bottom of it, having calculated out when the bottle would hit the ground with the gum.

As Giroro and Dororo tried to cheat the bottle, nothing they did could aid the bottle's tragectory. It stopped at Giroro.

"NO!" Giroro screamed. This was the worst game ever.

"Ku, ku, ku. I got you~." Kululu had obviously cheated it just to make Giroro miserable. "So I guess we gotta lip lock now."

Giroro quickly turned his head as Kululu kissed him on the cheek.

"It burns! How does it burn?" Giroro asked.

"Eh, I put something on my lips just for you." Kululu winked. "I'm testing a new chemical that makes skin burn acidicly. After the burn wears off it's supposed to feel like your body is covered in mosquito bites the worst torture of them all. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu wiped off his lips getting rid of the chemical mixture.

The burning stopped and Giroro screamed in agony. Why was Kululu using this to test experiments out?

"You really are horrible." Giroro hissed.

* * *

It was Giroro's turn. And he was too busy itching to cheat. He quickly shot at the bottle to get it to spin.

 _Come on. Come on. You have to get it to Natsumi._ Giroro told himself trying to shoot at the ground to keep the bottle spinning, but not being able to properly aim because of the pain he was in.

Dororo looked at him with pity. While nobody was looking he quickly did a ninja arte to let the bottle stop at Natsumi.

"YES!" Giroro yelled. "I mean...I actually...didn't get something bad in a game of chance?" He was honestly surprised.

"I'm surprised you didn't land on the stupid frog, or Kululu honestly. Your life just seems to be a never ending string of bad luck." Natsumi was surprised too.

"You're the only part of my life that's good luck." Giroro swooned.

"What?" Natsumi didn't hear him.

"Oh nevermind, d-do you want me to kiss your hand or something?" Giroro asked.

"Eh, you don't have to do that. I mean I'm not a baby like the stupid frog is." Natsumi told him, hinting that he could kiss her on the lips.

Giroro blushed deeply. He walked forward. However he fell. Not because of anyone tripping him, they really were rooting for Giroro, but just because he really was extremely clumsy.

His lips hit Natsumi's ankle.

"Well...That's a new one." Natsumi shrugged. "I guess if you didn't want to kiss me on the lips that's okay."

"No! I did! I did!" Giroro tried to tell her. But Natsumi wasn't listening. She was a little insulted that Giroro had rejected her.

Giroro cried.

* * *

It was Tamama's turn. "All right, bottle! Get Mr. Sergeant, or else!" Tamama threatened the bottle and spun it with all his strength.

Unfortunately it was a bottle. A bottle could not be threatened. It was not alive. The bottle landed at Angol Mois.

"Crap! I guess we didn't cheat hard enough to not have it land on one of them." Keroro realized. He wasn't trying to get Tamama and Mois together.

"No. No. No. No." Tamama just repeated, his eyes widening in fear. "I don't want my lips anywhere near that woman. Yuck. No."

"You have to. We all kissed the people we didn't want to kiss." Natsumi pointed out. "You can kiss her hand if you want."

"Ick! Her hand. That's way closer than I want!" Tamama shouted. "What's the grossest place on the body I can kiss?"

"...The butt?" Keroro suggested. "I mean you are kind of a butt kisser."

"Please. Please no." Tamama looked like he was going to vomit.

"Uncle. Gross." Angol Mois shook her head.

"There's only one butt I want to kiss!" Tamama announced "And it's Mr- I mean nobody's." He blushed.

Keroro had no idea what he was talking about.

"I guess I'll kiss the hand like a normal freakin person." Tamama sighed. He moved forward and opened his mouth. Instead of kissing Mois's hand he put her entire hand in his mouth like he was going to eat it.

"EEK! Help Uncle I think Tamama's trying to eat me!" Angol Mois screamed.

"That might just be how he kisses." Giroro pointed out. His face had been devoured by Tamama once before too. He shivered.

"It feels like he's biting though. And my hand is all slimey!" Angol Mois was trying desperately to try to tug her hand out of Tamama's mouth. "Help!"

Kululu sighed and went over to shove a carrot in Tamama's large mouth too. "There ya go."

"Ick!" Tamama spat it out. "That somehow tastes worse than that woman."

Angol Mois shook off her hand looking very worriedly at Tamama.

* * *

It was Dororo's turn now. _All right. No cheating. Just chance._ He spun it normally. And it landed on himself. "THIS HAPPENS EVERY TIME!" Dororo groaned.

"I guess you have to kiss yourself now." Keroro told him.

Dororo brought his hand to his mask, sobbing to himself. _I had wanted to be included in the game!_ He had wanted to kiss someone. But it ended like it always did. With him alone.

He cried as nobody watched him kiss himself pathetically.

* * *

It was Mois's turn finally.

"One last chance guys." Keroro whispered. They all shook hands with each other, ready to cheat this thing.

Unfortunately Mois whipped out her lucifer spear.

"Mois! That will break it!" Natsumi told her.

"I've been practicing! It's a huge skill to not break tiny things!" Mois boasted. "And I want to spin it in my way." She spun her spear.

"Mois...Mois...No." Natsumi moaned.

But Mois would not be persuaded.

"Yeah! You break that bottle!" Kululu was the sort of person who approved of bad behavior.

"I won't break it! I told you! I've been practicing!" She hit the bottle very likely. "Armageddon 1/100,000,000,000,000,000,000,000!" She yelled

There was a huge amount of air. It made everyone fall over. But the bottle only cracked, it did not break. And it spun wildly. So wildly that not even Giroro and Dororo could keep up with it to cheat it.

"Oh no this whole plan is going down the drain!" Keroro realized as the bottle spun desperately.

Finally it stopped. At Kululu no less.

Angol Mois clapped. "I win! I win! I didn't break it!"

The bottle shattered into a million pieces.

"Well I...uhh didn't break it when it was spinning. That...Doesn't count to disqualify me does it? I...I really did spin the bottle with my lucifer spear successfully!" Angol Mois's eyes were big with pride. She was so proud of herself for doing that.

"Uhhh...Well...We could disqualify you." Natsumi offered, trying to be helpful. "I mean, guys the bottle did break didn't it?" She looked around and saw her friends nodding, wanting to help Mois best they could so she didn't have to kiss Kululu.

"I mean...It didn't break while it was spinning. Heck it could have broken from a different reason." Kululu tried to persuade. "Mirrors break when I look at them. It could have been the same with the bottle."

Natsumi sighed. That was true.

"Yay! You really think I did it? You really think I didn't break the bottle?" Angol Mois asked Kululu, looking for compliments on her 'not breaking small things from a weapon of mass destruction skill' for some reason this was incredibly important to her.

"Well...I guess she wants to kiss Kululu?" Keroro pointed out to Giroro and Dororo.

"No. I don't think she does." Dororo sighed. "I think she's just..."

"Stupid." Giroro finished. He realized that Mois had no idea what she would have to do.

"Sure. Sure you didn't break it." Kululu lied. He didn't know why Angol Mois's eyes were sparkling so much from something really so small. "Anyway here's my hand, just get it over with-" He offered.

Angol Mois didn't hear him. Instead she swooped him up in her arms and kissed him straight on the lips very quickly and lightly, like she was supposed to.

"W-wha- Oh I g-guess y-you didn't want to be a b-baby?" Kululu was spinning when Mois put him back on the ground. He knew his legs were shaking underneath him very obviously. He knew his glasses had cracked and he was now seeing everything spin because he couldn't see.

He hadn't expected that at all.

"That's how the game's supposed to be played." Mois pointed out. "On the lips. I just played it like it was in the rules." She shrugged. "I did it!" She cheered for herself.

"I..I suppose you did." Kululu switched out his glasses for new glasses, trying not to look at Mois and trying to act normal. _I didn't know...she wanted to kiss me so much._ She was cheering for her achievement after all. And the short kiss had been so quick, so pure and sweet.

He still couldn't see even with the new glasses. He tried not to look at anyone, knowing he was probably blushing a lot. He could feel little sparks coming from his headphones. His only saving grace was Mois wasn't looking at him, nor was her hands still on him and kissing him.

 _We kissed..._ He kept repeating the events in his head.

"I did it! I didn't destroy a small thing from my armaggedon!" Mois cheered again.

"Oh." Kululu realized slight disappointment in his voice. She was cheering for achievement. Not because they had kissed.

Natsumi clapped for Mois, not sure if she was supposed to. How could Mois not have it sink in that she had just kissed someone and play that off so easily? She didn't know but she was happy that Mois wasn't disgusted.

"Okay...That was weird." Giroro agreed. "But I'm not sure it proves anything."

Keroro grimaced. "Yeah. She's happy but for the wrong reasons."

Nobody really focused on the fact that Mois and Kululu had kissed, except Kululu.

* * *

Kululu wanted to ask about it when he and Mois were alone. He kept touching his lips and thinking about it. _We kissed. That's...That's supposed to be a big deal._

Mois's face was just always the beacon of happiness but she hadn't blushed around him at all, or spoken to him about the kiss, it just seemed normal to her.

 _...She isn't kissing me again._ Kululu realized that he was a little disappointed. If this was so normal and no big deal, he was unsure why her lips weren't still on him.

He tried to write down tiny little details to his Mois document about this incident, hoping that it would help him figure out why he was so frustrated and confused around Mois and why he was so irritated that she wasn't kissing him again, but he couldn't keep his mind on the Mois document. He just kept his eyes on Mois.

 _Maybe it's no big deal because couples kiss. Maybe we are a couple._ She had kissed him directly on the lips, Kululu remembered. And she hadn't seen annoyed by it, it had just been a simple chaste thing.

If they were together, kissing would be no big deal. _So maybe this indicates that we are dating._

But if they were dating...Was this the start of their kisses? Did Mois just open the floodgates? _Maybe this means it's okay to kiss._ He was still a little annoyed that she hadn't kissed him again now that they were alone.

Sure that had been a game, but they had fricken kissed! Why was he the only one focused on that? Why was he the only one making a big deal in his mind out of that at all?

"M-mois, um—uhh-" How did he ask a girl if she wanted to try kissing again? He didn't even know why he wanted.

 _Ah. I've got to redo the experience obviously to get better results for my Mois document._ Kululu realized quickly writing that note down.

He'd have to really kiss her again, maybe four or five times to see if they were together or what she thought of it. Maybe he'd even have to kiss her longer. _That's a sacrifice that I suppose I'm just going to have to be willing to make to get amount of results._

Mois however was in her own little world. She was still thinking over the fact that she and Kululu might be in a relationship. She wasn't sure how to pull that detail out of him though.

 _I guess we did kiss today. If we kiss again I guess I'll know we are together?_ She decided. But with Kululu that sounded like it would be a long time to wait. After all there were a lot of times it seemed like Kululu would kiss her or maybe she thought he wanted to, and it just didn't happen so either she was misreading things or he was very shy.

With Kululu it was probably fear.

So she'd have to figure out if they were in a relationship through a way that didn't include kissing. "Hey Kululu, do you want to play a game?"

"A game?" Kululu asked. _Spin the bottle again?_ Perhaps his mind was still a little on kissing and kissing games because he nodded very quickly.

"Okay! It's a game of hypotheticals!" Mois told him. "We both ask each other what if questions and the other one has to answer. It's fun! It's a get to know you activity."

Kululu snapped into reality. "..Okay." He didn't really understand. _What's Mois trying to do? Maybe she's just trying to do some sort of innocent get to know you activity. That sounds so Mois._ He sighed. Mois's mind wasn't focused on any of the previous events. It was just the normal innocence and friendly things.

"Okay...If you were the leader of the platoon what would you do differently?" Mois asked, trying to start off easy.

"I'd invade for one thing. Ku." Kululu said quickly. "Wouldn't befriend the pekoponians or get enslaved by them. And I wouldn't allow the members of my platoon to go traitor or fall for the enemy."

Mois nodded. "That makes sense! You'd be a good leader." She complimented.

"Yeah, I already know that." Kululu shrugged, "But apparently I'm not the leaderly type. People don't listen to me or something." He looked a little annoyed. "My turn. If Tamama hated you what would you do?"

"That seems like a highly unlikely scenario." Angol Mois giggled. "I suppose I'd try to befriend him so he doesn't hate me anymore!" She decided.

"Ku, ku, ku. So just like normal." Kululu laughed.

"All right...My turn. Hmm..." Mois pretended to think. "If I was your girlfriend would you want me to be spending as much of my time with Uncle or would that make you uncomfortable?" Angol Mois tried to ask one of the questions that had always bugged her.

 _He didn't seem annoyed at all at mine and Uncle's relationship when our maybe relationship started. So I've gotta get a real answer out of him about what he thinks of it._ Angol Mois told herself, staring directly at Kululu.

Kululu frowned. _Okay...She said if. So that means we probably aren't...together-together._ He analyzed. It was a weird question. What if she was his girlfriend. It did sound like she was a little interested, but it was just a what if. And it was mostly about Keroro.

Maybe she was trying to figure out if they were dating if she could still flirt with Keroro on the side. _A normal question I suppose. If we actually knew if we were dating or not I'm sure we'd have that conversation eventually._ And if they were hypothetically together he never wanted to have the Keroro conversation.

He knew Mois liked Keroro more than she liked Kululu after all. And they weren't even really together so he didn't really want to deal with the break up step. "I suppose it would..." He finally answered carefully. "I mean you do like him. In this hypothetical scenario you and Keroro would feel kind of weird." He felt weird about saying that.

"Okay!" Angol Mois smiled brightly. _I'll keep that in mind! I guess if we are together I have to work more on me and Uncle not being seen as romantic._ Hard step but it was a habit she was willing to break. She was glad she had asked.

"Umm...If Keroro turned out to be gay what would you do?" Kululu asked, since the subject had turned to Keroro.

Angol Mois frowned. That had more to do with Keroro than her. _He's not really getting the game, huh?_ He didn't know yet she was trying to get answers out of him. "I'd support him! Because I care about—I mean cuz we're like family." She corrected. "And it's important to support someone when they're going through that." She added.

Kululu eyed her suspiciously at the 'family' comment. But he didn't make any further comment about not believing her.

"My turn! My turn!" Mois clapped. "If I was your girlfriend would you want to kiss me?" Mois asked.

Kululu felt himself heat up. There it was, the kissing possibility again. _I have to be smart about this answer. Not seem into the idea. Just casual._ "Yes." His voice betrayed him despite himself. _God darn it. Stupid desperate me._ He had never had this sort of embarrassing moment before, his larger thought process being shut down. _So this is what Giroro feels like. Ugh. And he's horny for kisses all the time. Disgusting._ He tried to insult Giroro in his head to cool himself down.

Mois smiled a lot to herself.

"M-my question!" Kululu said suddenly. _Ask her something casual like what if she destroyed the planet or something to do with destruction._ "If we were together would you want to kiss me-?" Desperate Kululu betrayed him. He wanted to scream in annoyance at himself.

"Yes." Mois smiled shyly and moved nearer to him. "Of course I would."

 _God. Okay so if we are together I guess...We can k-kiss some more._ He felt Mois's fingers around his fingers. He knew he was blushing a lot. He hoped she didn't know what he was thinking about.

"Okay...My turn if I was your girlfriend-" Mois smiled and got back to the game.

"Hey hey!" Kululu said nervously. "What's with all these what if you were my girlfriend things?"

"It's a what if game." Mois shrugged. "If I was your girlfriend would you like me? I mean if we were dating would you be romantically interested in me?"

Kululu's eyes widened and glasses cracked. _That was something I didn't expect her to ask._ Honestly he hadn't even asked himself that question. Or at least tried not to think about it. He wanted to confirm they were in a relationship because this whole situation was confusing to him and he wanted to learn about it. For observation purposes only. At least that's what he kept telling himself.

"Um...U-uhh I don't know what y-you're asking. C-could you word it differently?" Kululu requested stuttering and flustered quite a bit.

"If you were dating someone would it be romantic, basically. Would it be an indication of you being interested in them?" Angol Mois sighed, being more direct.

"W-well-" _Crap she thinks we might be dating, right? Won't answering this be basically like saying I love her?_ Kululu realized with dread what she had trapped him into. "Well dating is defined in the normal terms as two people getting to know each other to s-see if they want to spend more time together-"

"I didn't ask for a definition, Kululu." Mois frowned. "I asked if-"

"I know what you asked!" Kululu blushed. _Is she interested in that? Us being interested in each other?_ He realized suddenly that he had been investigating if she had feelings for him. And he had forgotten one of the most important things in Mois's document describing her- she was romantic. She liked romance. Of course she would be interested in pursuing a romantic relationship.

Kululu's head was spinning. Because confronting his feelings for Mois was a huge task, and something he had hoped to bury deep down instead of thinking of. In hindsight that was near impossible when they might in fact be dating and they had fricken kissed, but he didn't know if the first person to hear about his feelings should be Mois instead of himself.

He knew deep down this was probably the thing that was most important to Mois. But it was scary to think about. His throat probably already knew the answer, but he refused to answer or confront that without knowing for sure if Mois herself was into him.

Yeah it seemed like right now she was into him, quite a bit. But there was always a chance that she was just scheming like he would be. He...He couldn't fully trust how flirtatious this game was getting.

 _I'm not a loser. I'm not pathetic like the rest of my platoon._ Kululu tried to calm down and tell himself. He wouldn't start something, wouldn't try something if there wasn't the chance of success. If it wasn't a 100% done deal then he wasn't trying it. He didn't want to experience the possibility of getting emotionally hurt.

For someone who dealt with rejection a lot, Kululu seemed to be very frightened of it. So much so that he would rather accidentally fall into a relationship with Mois then be direct and risk her saying no and being forever disgusted with him.

It was part of the reason asking things was so hard.

"Well? Would you love me?" Angol Mois asked again.

"K-ku." Kululu chuckled a bit nervously. "All these questions, Mois, it kinda sounds like you want to be my girlfriend or something." Instead of answering Kululu did what he did best, tease someone.

Mois frowned. He hadn't answered. "Do you want me to be your girlfriend?" She tried to answer innocently. _I will get an answer out of him no matter what!_ She told herself stubbornly.

She wouldn't just let herself accidentally fall into a relationship with Kululu. She needed to actually know where they stood and how Kululu felt. Any other way might risk the chance of her being the only one interested in a relationship and Kululu maintaining one for some experiment or to keep his enemies close or something like that.

She needed something, anything, to go off of on Kululu's own feelings. Unfortunately both of them seemed to be determined to not be the ones to confess something first.

"You can't answer a question with a question." Kululu complained. _Why can't you give me a straight answer?_ He had tried using Keroro to get that answer and that hadn't worked. He really needed something, anything, to go off of here and over analyze.

"You're so confusing." Kululu groaned, frustrated. "Why are you always so confusing?" This was why he had to make documents and databases dedicated to Angol Mois. Because he could never understand her even with his massive intellect. She was just too confusing.

"I...I think...This is what's confusing." Angol Mois sighed, finally answering.

"This?" Kululu asked.

She gestured between them.

 _Uh-oh. An actual conversation._ Kululu realized. He had been trying to avoid this. He wanted Mois to give her own answers, reach her own conclusions. But a conversation required the dreaded communication and equality in their answers.

He was bad at communicating with people.

 _I guess her desire to have honesty would make her break._ Kululu realized.

"I...I think we might both be confused about our relationship. Now...This might be because for some reason Uncle's prodding us a lot. I think he thinks we like each other?" Mois suggested.

"Yeah, I don't know why. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu tried to push the conversation towards Keroro.

Mois ignored him. "And maybe it's not because of Uncle. Maybe we're hanging out like normal people,"

Kululu nodded hoping she wouldn't continue.

"Or maybe we're dating." Mois continued. "But...I think we're both kinda confused about what we are." She glanced at Kululu, "Right?" She was a little worried she was wrong, but because of how none direct Kululu was being she suspected he was confused too. Meaning they really needed to talk and figure out.

 _Cuz Kululu probably won't talk to me from scheming. I think it's time to be direct with each other._ She decided.

Kululu gave a tiny nod. Yeah they were in a confusing thing.

"And...I'm really confused honestly about what we are. And I need you to kinda...be direct with me and talk to me?" Mois requested in her kind, innocent and honest way. "I need to know what you think."

It was the stuff that frightened Kululu.

Kululu shivered, but tried to continue to not give direct answers. "Um..Well...Being confused is fine. I like confused." He first tried to reassure Mois.

She smiled, a little more relieved that Kululu hadn't been mad at her for being confused.

"Ku, ku, ku after all I'm confused around you all the time!" Kululu joked. "So maybe we're just in the same...mental location with each other for once. You know...Confused." He pointed out.

Mois smiled and squeezed his hand. She appreciated him trying to console her, and speaking honestly. _But what are we?_ She wanted to ask.

"I don't...really see why we need to do anything differently though, so you don't need to worry. We can just continue doing the same stuff we've always done." Kululu tried to continue to be sort of consoling, while trying to end the conversation. "Being confused is twisted, but it's kind of fun, isn't it? I like this confused thing." He admitted.

He liked the mess they were in. He would have never imagined it coming about normally. And he was pretty sure the only sort of relationship he could actually manage was a confused mess. It was the sort of mess that his whole life was. And it didn't have as much of the risk of getting hurt.

He was twisted, he knew that. So he really wanted to maintain the confused mess as it was.

 _Sure it's annoying not knowing something. But that's part of the fun too, figuring it out._ He just didn't want to have a conversation about it. He just wanted it to dawn on him from the obvious or something that Mois was in love with him.

Mois sighed. That was such a Kululu thing to say. Not really direct, but at least he was talking. She removed her hand from his. "It is fun, a little bit." She admitted.

"Good." Kululu spun to his computer, hoping that the conversation had ended.

"But...I don't want a relationship that's a mess." Mois replied. "Even if it's just a confused one. It..It doesn't really work long-term, does it?"

"Sure it does." Kululu said quickly.

"Kululu...I think you know deep down that we really do have to actually figure out where we stand." Mois crossed her arms. "I'm just guessing you were going to figure it out on your own and not tell me somehow."

 _Bing-o._ Kululu realized she had him to the peg.

"You do realize that...That doesn't work out realistically?" Mois pointed out. She didn't look annoyed by Kululu's mistake, just a little sorry for his idea. But she was happy to be patient with him. After all what she wanted was real answers. "It's not really dating if only one person knows they're dating the other."

Kululu looked completely confused. That wasn't how relationships work? _I suppose..That could be classified as delusion. She's right. But I planned to learn that she thought we were in a relationship._ He did see her point that his logic was flawed because he was never going to confirm that relationship.

"I have an idea. And it doesn't involve too much talking." Mois offered, knowing that Kululu clearly didn't want to talk about this. It didn't seem too much like a clue that he wasn't interested, she just knew Kululu was usually afraid of her and looked very much like he was nervous about this whole conversation. He kept trying to pretend to clue out of it.

"I'm on board then." Kululu agreed. "What's your plan?"

"We write down on a piece of paper if we want to be in a relationship or not. Then we trade papers at the same time." Mois told him. "That'll make our feelings clear and if it's the same thing then maybe we could be in a real relationship instead of this mess?" She suggested a little nervously.

Kululu focused on the word maybe. _It's not definite._ And he wanted a definite done deal. _That won't work out._ "I've got an idea too. We could ask a magic eightball. That seems safe. Just chance and then we would agree to abide my the magic eightballs ruling."

Angol Mois sighed. "That...Doesn't really..." _Sound like we'd talk about our feelings then._ "If I agree to trying that one first would you agree to the paper exchange?" She asked.

"Ku, sure." Kululu agreed. He hoped regardless of what happened with the papers Mois would be on board with the eightball. Maybe the eightball would go so well that they just would never talk about it again.

In Kululu's ideal world they never actually talked about their feelings, went on dates, and kissed a lot apparently. It was a complicated world. _Frustrating that that's what I want. Perhaps it's because her purity couldn't get to me if we didn't ever talk about how we felt._ He didn't mind too much if she said something like she liked him. Sure it would destroy him and the idea was terrifying, but he didn't mind it.

It's just that if she had feelings that she talked about there was always the chance that she could stop having feelings. And because Kululu over planned things and over predicted them that was a conversation he dreaded way more than that one.

They couldn't break up if they were never really together after all.

* * *

The eightball went just as he planned. He of course had just put a thing in an eightball that only had the answer 'yes definitely' and 'yes' and 'yep.'

When Angol Mois shook it she frowned.

 _I rigged it, sucker! Ku, ku, ku._ Kululu laughed to himself in a childish way.

"Now...Eightball...Did Kululu rig you?" Angol Mois asked and shaked it.

It came up as yes, because those were the only answers.

"Hmmm..." She looked at Kululu. "I think we'll go with my plan now."

"Well...It did say yes?" Kululu shrugged nervously, knowing she had caught on to his cheating. "Isn't that good enough?" _It did kind of come from me._

Angol Mois shook her head. She wanted a definite answer. And that was the opposite of what Kululu wanted.

* * *

Kululu carefully stared down at his piece of paper. He wasn't sure what to write, and there were really only two things he had the option of writing.

Did he want to be in a relationship with Mois? Did he want to be together with Mois? Did he like Mois? His options were really only writing a yes or no.

He wrote a yes, and immediately erased that. _Nope, this thing is asking about MY feelings._ And that scared him. Because if he wrote a yes, Mois would definitely take that as him being interested in her. That was the point of this thing.

He tried to glance over at Mois, he really wanted to see what she would write first. But they were exchanging this at the same time.

He tried to reach over to a raygun that would freeze her.

"No." Mois frowned, hearing his movement. "No cheating. It's a yes or no question, it's not that hard. Do you want to be together with me?" She sounded a little annoyed that he even thought of freezing her. But she seemed to have expected that so much.

Kululu looked down at his paper again with dread. _Maybe I should think of this in a different way. Mois has to answer the same question._ That brightened his mood a little. Soon enough he would have irrefutable proof that Mois wanted to date him. That she wanted to be together with him.

That she was interested in him.

 _She might put a no though._ A little voice in his mind expressed. That was true. She had only said she was confused, not that she wanted to be with him. She hadn't acted as into kissing him as he had towards her.

She had acted like normal on all their dates. And she had been in love with Keroro for years. The more Kululu's insecurities over thought the situation the more likely he realized it was that she would write a no and she just wanted to make sure they agreed on it.

 _Can...Can you imagine how devastating it would be to write a yes and get a no?_ That would show that he was interested in dating Mois, but Mois wasn't. That would be rejection.

He could already feel it. He never wanted to open his heart enough to feel heartbreak, but he could already feel it happening.

To save himself from that experience. He quickly wrote a no, not thinking about it any longer as both he and Mois turned to each other.

"All right! Switch!" Mois grinned, overjoyed by her plan. They handed each other the pieces of paper.

 _Well, here's the no._ Kululu's depressing thoughts told him. He had made the right choice. He turned the paper up to see it.

Instead of a No written in big betters, Kululu saw a Yes. There was a heart doodled after it, as if to further outline that Mois was in fact interested in him.

His eyes widened and his glasses cracked. _Oh...Oh my….She...She actually does like me?_ He had thought he had been just over analyzing things. Over reading it until now. But he felt himself grin as he held the tiny slip of paper. Mois really wanted to date him! And now he had concrete proof of it.

"Mois, I-" _I'm happy. I'd be happy to date you. We can date. I like you too._ Kululu couldn't figure out what to say first. Just like he had wanted he had gotten Mois's answer first and now things were a definite thing.

He looked over at Mois but she didn't look as happy as he did. "You wrote no."

"Oh." Kululu was quiet for a moment. _Oops. I think the point of these things are to have the same answer._ "It's just a paper-" He tried to tell her.

"I kinda thought you'd put yes." Mois said quietly to herself.

"Umm..." He wondered how he could quickly make this not awkward, and ensure that they did in fact pursue the relationship Mois wanted. "It's fine, I mean I wasn't being that sincere on that paper, if you want a relationship we can-"

"No." Mois shook her head. "I only want to be with someone who wants to be with me." She placed the paper delicately on her desk.

"Yeah, but I wasn't being that sincere on the piece of paper. So my answer really isn't a big deal." Kululu pointed out.

"You were supposed to be honest and sincere on the paper. It...It was only one word." Mois pointed out. She tried not to look sad or disappointed. But she was clearly hurt.

"Yeah but you were asking me of all people to be honest, and I'm not! Ku, ku, ku. So the paper really isn't a big deal." Kululu tried to reassure. "I was going to write a yes too." He admitted quickly.

"No you weren't. And you're just saying that because I like you." Mois snapped a little.

Kululu was quiet. He didn't understand the problem here. _Well, she just said it again. So if I can just fix the mess I already created things will be fine._ How did people usually fix his messes? He was such a jerk, even to himself it seemed.

"You do realize that we can't be together, right?" Mois asked him quickly. He probably didn't realize she was hurt. He was Kululu. Or maybe he did. He seemed to know when people were hurt a lot.

"...Why not?" Kululu asked, slightly confused. _She wanted to be together a second ago._

"Because you said no." Mois raised her voice a little. "I told you I don't want to be together in that sort of situation."

"And I told you I lied." Kululu sighed. "So everything should be fine."

"But...You're not telling me like...why you lied. And you're not...telling me anything about your feelings or anything like that. And I told you I wanted to know about that stuff if we were in a relationship." Mois now seemed less sad and more angry.

 _Crap. I've been trying to make her angry for years and now I did it accidentally._ He really didn't know how to fix this. Her anger was pretty...destructive too. And he had thought this paper thing would have avoided the talking about feelings thing.

Were they past the point of no return?

"I put the no cuz I thought you were going to write a no." Kululu said quickly. "But you didn't."

"So you'd just agree to be with me for me? That doesn't make me feel any better. I don't want to be together just cuz of me." Mois looked at him sadly. "You...You do understand why I'm hurt, right?"

 _Well I do understand that you are hurt. And I was trying to see your paper to make sure this didn't happen._ "I feel like your paper plan was probably a bad one. It could easily be rife with miscommunication."

"But you didn't want to communicate in the first place!" Mois groaned. "And I guess that's the problem." He still wasn't communicating with her. "Never mind, Kululu. I guess that was our chance. It's fine." She picked up some of her work.

"W-where are you going?" Kululu asked quickly. "And hey, I had a much better plan. With the magic eight ball and all. That didn't risk any hurt feelings." He tried to point out to her.

Angol Mois ignored him and walked away.

"W-wait!" Kululu tried to get her to stop. _Crap. I haven't fixed things yet._ "Didn't you want to talk more?" He wasn't very good at this, fixing fights.

"I think we've already come to a conclusion, Kululu." She said coldly. "Now I'm going to finish my work somewhere else." And she left the room.

Kululu watched her go, cursing himself over and over again. He was so close!

 _I guess….I just lost my chance forever._ That was so like any relationship in this cursed house. But he couldn't really blame anyone else. It was all on him, and that was what hurt.

As he reread all of his Mois database to try to figure out how he could have done things differently the answer remained obvious- he could have talked to her, and been direct about how he felt.

But instead he had feared her reaction too much, positive or negative reaction, and even when she had gotten extremely hurt by his answer he still feared making things worse and refused to try to make it better.

 _I guess...This is a break up._

At least he didn't need to be confused anymore. He and Mois had broken up.

He slammed his head on the table, feeling absolute miserable.

He desperately wanted to go after Mois, but he feared just making her hate him more.

 _Keroro really is stupid. How did he ever think I would manage a relationship?_ He sucked at this.

He continued to drown himself in pity.

* * *

 **All right, sorry about the ending. Next chapter will be the last chapter though.**


	8. Villains Win

**All right, the original draft or plan for this chapter was to get Kululu and Mois back together in a sweeter or romantic way. But I ditched that for the fun and comedy.**

 **I know I had a few things to resolve in this chapter that I tried to work on. The Keroro and Mois thing was one of them and I hope I brought that to an okay conclusion.**

* * *

Keroro wasn't sure how else he could show Giroro and Dororo that Mois was in love with Kululu and not him.

 _Back to the basics._ He decided. "Questions! It's been a while, so maybe they'll give a different answer than last time."

Giroro rolled his eyes. "You really don't give up, do you? She kissed him and there was nothing. I think she was cheering about not destroying a bottle of all things instead."

Keroro frowned. That wouldn't destroy his dreams! He had to do this. Not for Mois, but for him. _Mois is not going to be in love with me._

* * *

It was Keroro as usual who tried to ask Mois questions. Luckily she was always around. Despite his insults about her skills in laundry folding she hadn't stopped helping him.

"Hey, Mois, what do you think of Kululu's appearance? Attractive? Pretty? What kind of people do you find pretty? Is hair necessary to you?" Keroro waggled a single eyebrow that he was holding in his hand about to put it on his face.

Mois sighed. Usually she went along with Keroro's questions and tried to answer to the best of her ability. But she didn't have her usual smile on her face. "Uncle, I don't feel like answering that. I don't really want to think about Kululu."

Keroro frowned. She was acting like a normal person towards Kululu! He didn't want that. "Well nobody does, but that doesn't mean you don't think about him. In fact I bet you're thinking of him right now!"

"You just mentioned him." Mois defended. "So yeah. But I don't want to think about Kululu right now."

Keroro frowned. That was so...normal. "Okay, fine I'll ask something not to do with Kululu. If you could kiss anyone right now, who would it be?"

"Uncle, I don't want to talk right now." Mois now looked extremely bummed out. "I just don't feel like thinking about those things."

"Aww why not?" Keroro asked.

"I'm not really in the mood for imagining romance." Mois admitted.

Keroro gasped and covered his mouth. Now that was abnormal for Mois. _Oh god, she looks sad. I've never seen Mois so quiet._ Well he had but he hadn't noticed. But a Mois that wasn't going on and on about romance? That seemed great for him but definitely weird?

"Did...Did I do something? I'm sorry." Keroro apologized. "Please don't be mad at me."

Mois smiled down at Keroro a bit. "It wasn't you. Don't worry."

"...Really?" Keroro asked.

"Well...Maybe it had some to do with you." She reluctantly admitted. "I think you've been pushing me and Kululu too hard. I don't really like it. And I don't really want you to think things that don't exist. So...Could you please stop? For me?" Angol Mois pleaded.

Keroro cracked. His beautiful plan! His beautiful proof! It was going down the drain. _She really isn't interested oh no!_ And she realized he was pushing them together and really didn't like it.

He wondered if her bad mood was completely his fault. He didn't want to be at fault for something. But part of him didn't want to give up. "I...I understand..."

"Good!" Mois smiled.

 _I'll...I'll bounce back soon. I can't just leave things like this. Mois's just in a bad mood right now._ Keroro reasoned to himself.

He didn't know how to get her in a good mood though.

* * *

Giroro didn't know about how badly Keroro's questions were going. "Keroro always gets the easy of the two of them." Giroro sighed.

But he usually had to talk to Kululu. Why was he always the one chosen? This sucked! Kululu used this to always tease him.

"Hey, uhh, Kululu, can I ask you something about our co-workers? It's strictly to measure how well people work together in the invasion." Giroro lied.

Kululu seemed to be typing something. Plans for something. He looked a little frazzled and like he hadn't slept much, probably stressed.

They had no deadline coming up on the invasion so it confused Giroro.

"Oh? Giroro. You've come to bother me for something. I can't invent some big gun right now. I'm working on something important." Kululu told him. "But go ahead, I can't promise answers." He didn't seem to be paying much attention to Giroro. He didn't even turn to face him.

Giroro tried to peer over Kululu's shoulder to see what he was working on. One of his monitors seemed to be on his creepy 'Mois database documents' and another seemed to be a security camera on Mois and Keroro talking. He seemed to be working on some sort of document titled 'potential fixes'

One of the potential fixes on the document, Giroro noticed was memory erasing. Giroro didn't know what Kululu had done but he shivered a bit. "You can't erase someone's memories to fix something."

"Darn." Kululu cursed. He then glanced behind him realizing Giroro was watching what he was doing. He immediately closed his screens. "I don't have much time, make what you want quick."

"Do you think Mois is pretty?" Giroro asked, hoping his premise for asking Kululu this sort of question was believable enough.

It wasn't because Kululu glared at him. "Did Mois or the captain put you up to that question?"

Giroro wasn't sure why Mois would.

"Never mind, I'm not answering that one anyway. It seems like a waste of time." Kululu tried to spin around.

"If you could kiss anyone right now who would it be?" Giroro asked, already hearing the dread in his voice. Kululu would definitely use that to flirt with him.

"Ick. You hitting on me?" Kululu tried to tease. "Even if you are I don't have any time for that. I'm working on something so I can't mock you relentless right now."

 _That's weird...Usually he takes any opportunity presented to harass me._ Giroro realized. But right now it seemed like he simply didn't want to talk. Perhaps this was the best interaction he had had with Kululu if he didn't want to speak to him.

"Listen you probably know the real reason why I came here and am asking you weird questions." Giroro decided to throw Keroro's plan away, it really wasn't working, and just be honest for once.

"The captain. He's still being bothersome. When you leave tell him to leave me and Mois the frick alone, mmkay?" Kululu requested. "Actually...Nah tell him to leave me alone." He corrected.

If Keroro miraculously prodded Mois enough to make her like Kululu again, that would be fine with Kululu. It didn't really hurt him that Keroro was bothering her.

Giroro frowned at Kululu's lack of sympathy for Mois, nor need to help her. _I told Keroro that Kululu can't care about anyone._

"Look, I'm going to be honest. I know you don't like Mois. You don't know what love is. You can't feel it." Giroro told him.

"You...Are in fact correct." Kululu finally affirmed Giroro's theory. "I don't love." He agreed.

"But Mois does. And so does Keroro. Normal people love." Giroro pointed out.

"I...I know." Kululu said a bit regretfully. "...So what do you suggest?" He asked finally. "Normal people like Mois love. I don't. Keroro thinks we're together or something, but we're not. Do...Do I change myself? I don't know what to do Giroro." Kululu didn't realize that he was rambling. "How do normal people work? I've tried to think of 1000 different scenarios that are incredibly intelligent but come from a perspective of not feeling and they won't work. So how do normal people do things?"

Giroro just stared at him a bit confused. "Well, first of all I don't think it will be that hard to get Keroro to leave you two alone." He decided Kululu was complaining about Keroro bothering him. Obviously. He wasn't Kululu but he was tired of it too. "He's so dedicated to this theory because he's in denial himself. Keroro does love Mois."

"Oh. Yeah. I..I k-knew that." Kululu nodded. He had just forgotten briefly.

"So the way to fix this whole mess is to get them together finally." Giroro brought out a gun. "I know you don't care for happiness or getting people to resolve their differences, but if you want your freedom you will help me. We have to bring an end to this. And I can think of no better person who has stakes in this whole thing that would benefit from them together." Giroro meant because Kululu would be left alone.

"...You want me to help you set up Keroro and Mois? Ku, ku, ku. That's a riot. Just because a gun's pointed at my head doesn't mean I'll help someone else's relationship." Giroro now had Kululu's full attention.

"Sometimes we have to do the right thing. I'm going to do the right thing instead of being patient with Keroro by helping him realize his feelings. And I'm going to make you do the right thing to." Giroro told him.

Kululu was silent as the gun was pointed to his head. He knew he could survive it. And usually he would immediately refuse, not wanting to help someone and instead messing it up.

 _She was so sad though._ He remembered. He had made her sad. And her expression was still plaguing his mind.

Realistically he didn't know if he could fix them. But he didn't want Mois to continue being sad for an extended period of time.

 _Would this make it better? Would this make her happy?_ She had always wanted Keroro's attention. And now she was so close to receiving it.

"...Fine. What are we going to do?" Kululu agreed. He didn't agree so he would be left alone but for Mois.

"We'll set them up on a blind date." Giroro suggested.

Kululu nodded. Soon enough everything would go back to the status quo, but Mois would have what she always wanted.

* * *

The plan was easy, to invite Keroro to a nice cafe. Mois wouldn't have to be lied to since she very easily wanted to go. They would tell Keroro that a fan of his wanted to meet him.

"You tell him." Giroro told Kululu. "He wouldn't believe me at all. But you have information at your fingertips. I can tell Mois about the situation."

Kululu nodded and looked at Keroro who was building a gundam model in his room. He took a deep breath. _Okay. It's just doing one nice thing. It's not going to kill you._ He was going to convince Keroro to go on a blind date with a fan, he was good at manipulating people into things.

It would be easy.

But for some reason he didn't feel fear at the idea of doing something nice, for Mois. It instead felt like his heart was being torn into a million pieces. It hurt. It hurt so much.

 _I always knew kindness tore up the soul._ Kululu decided, although he knew as he touched his chest that it wasn't that. He just...Didn't want to see Mois and Keroro together.

He tried to move his leg into Keroro's room, but he couldn't. _I can't do this one nice thing for Mois? Come on._

"I can't do it." Kululu finally revealed.

"Why not? Just...Just think about it as tricking Keroro into something. Not...Not being nice to both of them. Don't think about them after this situation. Don't imagine their happiness. Just….Just think about how difficult it will be to trick Keroro into a date and that you're the only one smart enough to do it!" Giroro tried to convince.

"Nah. I don't think I'm the right person to do this thing." Kululu shook his head.

"You're the only one mean enough to break Keroro's denial!" Giroro hissed, desperate for Keroro to realize how he himself felt.

"It's kinda a conflict of interest for me to be involved in this. I mean even if I set them up I'd probably do something horribly jerky to make sure their date didn't go well. I just can't stop myself from being mean. Ku, ku, ku." Kululu pointed out.

"I'll help you!" Giroro offered. "I can knock you out after this so you'll be out for their date!"

It was tempting, but Kululu shook his head. "You don't understand. I can't do this. Mois and I just broke up and it feels...weird to do this. I don't think I'm capable of it."

Giroro's mouth fell open. "W-what...Um...What? You and Mois just broke up?" He could understand a normal person dealing with a break up. And a normal person definitely wouldn't be able to set their ex up with the person that they liked. But Kululu was not a normal person. He wasn't experiencing normal heart break up.

 _Wait...They were together? Keroro...Keroro was right?_ Giroro's head was spinning. Was he in an alternate universe where Keroro was observant and Kululu was in a relationship with someone? This didn't sound right.

Kululu slumped to the ground. "Kinda."

"You...And Mois were together?" Giroro asked still in shocked.

"I didn't know we were together." Kululu defended a bit. "So imagine my surprise when it turned out I was in a relationship I didn't know about and then immediately got broken up with. It was a messy tornado!"

Giroro could understand how that would be confusing. _How...How does someone not know they're together with someone?_ He decided to shake it out of his head.

Kululu had gotten dumped. He focused on that detail instead. And as he stared at Kululu's pathetic state he raised a finger and laughed. "Ha ha ha!" It felt good to mock Kululu at his lowest point when Kululu had mocked him for years.

Kululu glared. He was miserable but that didn't mean he wouldn't start planning his revenge against Giroro. Giroro wouldn't get away with this. "I see that you find it funny."

Giroro tried to compose himself. "I do. But...I suppose we still have a task to do." He tried to remind himself.

"I told you I'm not doing it." Kululu repeated. "Can't."

"Sure you can." Giroro told him. "You're not dealing with anything tough. You're just being childish and selfish. You and I both know you don't like Mois. You didn't. You're just feeling a little sore from someone dumping you."

Kululu eyed him wondering if Giroro was right.

"It's like...Listen, you never liked Mois, but now that the chance has appeared of someone else getting together with her you're feeling oddly possessive? You didn't want to be with Mois, you're afraid of her. But you hate the idea of someone else getting together with something you think was yours. Because you're a selfish jerk." Giroro told him. "But that isn't going to stop me from pushing you into helping make an actual difference in their lives. They both deserve happiness." Giroro never thought he'd be consoling Kululu from a break up.

 _I have to kinda remind him that he's a jerk though so he can successfully do things._ Giroro reminded. Kululu looked extremely mopey. He didn't know if Kululu could trick Keroro in this state.

"I'm not going to budge. I'm not getting them together." Kululu insisted. He seemed to be thinking about something for a moment. "Hey, wait, Giroro, you're a stupid romantic aren't you? What's some of those weird Natsumi plots you've used on Natsumi that would never win over any sane girl?" _Mois's not exactly normal. She likes those dumb romantic things. Maybe thinking more like Giroro could help my plans._

Giroro crossed his arms realizing what Kululu was getting at. "You're not getting...weirdly back together with Mois. You don't even like her! I can't believe you're thinking about this just so she won't get together with Keroro."

"Ku. That does seem just like me." Kululu admitted. "But maybe I've got the best at heart?" He suggested. "Mois is pretty hurt over this. I'm just trying to figure out the best way to get rid of her sparkly tears and sadness so I won't be annoyed by them." It was a weird way to admit that he wanted to cheer someone up. But Giroro knew sort of how it translated.

"If you want to cheer her up, get her together with Keroro. She's been in love with him for five years. She stopped destroying the planet for him, and has helped him with everything. You know their life...Is basically their love story and that they were meant to be together." Giroro pointed out. "Trust me if you don't want her to be hurt just do this one thing." He begged.

Kululu still looked reluctant. _He's right. I don't love. Or like. I'm a monster. I'm a selfish jerk and that's how I got into this mess. Because I didn't want to talk about feelings._

 _But...Oddly enough I still don't want Mois to date Keroro. I want her to date me. So...Am I really selfish?_ Was Giroro right about him? Why did he want Mois to get back together with him if he didn't like her?

 _It's because I need to be closer to her to analyze the phenomenon that makes her so scary. That's it. I need to date her. I need her._ Kululu repeated those last three words in his head over and over again.

He needed Mois to be with him. It hadn't really mattered to him before if that was as friends, co-workers, or whatever, but now he really wanted it to be as a couple. It had felt like something addicting, something he didn't want to get rid of.

"Kululu...I know...Even though you two broke up, that you don't have a crush on Mois." Giroro tried to talk to him again. "Heck even if you were making out right in front of me I wouldn't believe that you loved each other. I know the truth. What you feel isn't real love."

It hurt to hear but Kululu nodded because it was the truth that he had circulated. It was the thing he believed.

"I think you need to hear this because you probably think Keroro's taking something from you and can't wrap your mind around them together because of it." Giroro told him, "But Mois probably didn't dump you because of Keroro. She's not that type of person."

 _I know that! I know for once in my life she wasn't focused on Keroro._ Kululu thought to himself. He knew this was his fault. That he had deserved getting dumped. But he found himself asking anyway because part of him wanted to blame it on Keroro.

They never would have worked out. He kept telling himself that. Because eventually she would have dumped him because she loved Keroro. "Why?" He asked.

"Mois's a normal girl." Giroro said simply. "She does care about that love stuff. She doesn't just want to be an experiment to someone, or be observed for a database." His eyes glinted. He had seen Kululu's documents.

Kululu's crooked permanent grin fell. Giroro was completely right. That was exactly the reason Mois was mad.

 _I tried to look in her database so much after the incident. Try to figure out how I could have done things differently. If it was obvious that she would have said yes._ He had relied on notes to deal with Mois and not just taking chances. _I wanted to observe her. But that...That wasn't because she was an experiment. She frustrated me. Confused me._ Kululu knew he didn't understand love and that he could easily get confused by it. He had just tried...to figure it out. Why Mois made him feel the way she did. _That was all an excuse wasn't it? Just to have an excuse to watch and look at her._

Mois was never really an experiment or an observation. But Kululu hadn't realized that until the end and that was why it hurt so much. She was a normal girl and Kululu just didn't know how to start a normal relationship. He didn't know how to communicate to a normal girl that he cared for her. It scared him more than anything.

He wanted to say something, anything, cry, say that he could do it, that he could be do that love stuff not Keroro. Before he could answer or do anything though Dororo dropped down from the ceiling next to Keroro in his room.

"Shh." Giroro told him. He wanted to see what Dororo did. Was Dororo having his own thoughts and plan?

So the two of them listened in.

"I know patience is probably the best, Keroro. But I think perhaps you are the thick headed type that needs someone to just pound the information into you." Dororo handed Keroro a crumpled piece of paper.

"The relationship chart!" Keroro realized. "And look, there's the line I drew between Mois and Kululu!"

"It's false." Dororo told him. "They don't like each other. But Mois...Mois actually loves you." He pointed to the line between Mois and Keroro. "And I think you like her too."

"No way!" Keroro shook his head. "Mois doesn't like me. I raised her as a kid Dororo. That's rude to both me and Mois. Stop being gross."

Dororo sighed. "I think because of Mois's previous relationship you've got this twisted view of defending her honor. But she's grown up, Keroro."

Keroro looked at him like that didn't make it better.

"And...I think you've realized that." Dororo told him. "Perhaps your jealous of her relationship with Kululu or perhaps you've become delusioned and think you don't have a chance because of this, or just think Mois's so great that Kululu would fall in love with her. But I think you're so desperate to prove this because you yourself are in love with her. You just are in so much denial that you can't confront that about yourself."

Keroro looked at him. "Dororo...Have you been thinking this the entire time?"

"Yes. I've put a great deal of thought into it. And trust me everyone, including Kululu, has noticed your feelings for Mois." Dororo put his hand on Keroro's shoulder. "Just...Please listen to me for once. For your own sake. You love Mois. You're in love with Mois. Not Kululu."

Keroro just stared at him longer trying to process this information. He was speechless.

Dororo smiled. "See? You're speechless from the news. This must be because it's sinking in." He hoped he could get it through Keroro's thick skull.

"You...And everybody else...Think I'm in love with Mois? Me?" Keroro asked.

"Yes. You love Mois." Dororo told him.

"I love Mois?" Keroro said the words like it was a question. He was broken and still processing that Dororo and apparently everyone thought this.

But Dororo took it as confirmation. "Please...Just think about it. It's super important and will better your life. It's what's meant to be in the veil of fate."

He jumped back into the ceiling disappearing as Keroro just stared at where he had gone. "I...I love Mois?" He repeated again broken.

Giroro and Kululu watched the scene transpire.

"See? He does love Mois." Giroro told Kululu glancing at him.

Kululu covered his mouth. "Crap. He actually does love Mois. Now nothing is stopping their relationship. He's realized it."

"Yep." Giroro grinned. It didn't seem like he needed Kululu anymore to trick Keroro into a relationship.

He was going to kick Kululu away and throw him to the curb, but something that Giroro never thought would happen did. Tears poured out from under Kululu's glasses as he covered his mouth.

"I really messed up." Kululu quickly traded his glasses for another pair, trying to hide the tears and that he had started crying over this. "They're going to get together. I mean we all knew this was coming of course. It's finally happening." Kululu couldn't stop the tiny little fluid from his eyes. "Have any pepper spray?" He asked. Perhaps that would stop the tears.

Giroro just stared in stunned silence at Kululu.

 _I...I messed up. She liked me. She doesn't anymore. My...My fear of rejection created a self fulfilled prophecy._ He wished he could go back in time. But at least the outside of his body looked as pathetic as the inside did right now. He felt pathetic.

"Wait...Wait a minute...Keroro's...Keroro's chart was right?" Giroro was finally figuring out.

Keroro had thrown the piece of paper outside his room unaware Kululu and Giroro were there. Giroro picked it up and showed it to Kululu. "Ah. Mois doesn't like you, but your weird...thing with her is an obsession isn't it?" Giroro realized.

"It's not an obsession." Kululu hissed.

"It's one sided though." Giroro corrected grinning a bit at Kululu's pain.

Kululu didn't respond to Giroro. Because Giroro was right again. _I wanted to date her. Of course it's an obsession. Of course it's one sided._ He was constantly thinking about Mois.

 _I'm...I'm in love with her._ Kululu realized. He didn't want to be without her. But it was completely one-sided. "Ku, ku, ku." _I'm a jerk that sabotages my own relationships. I bet this is karma._

It was funny in a way if he enjoyed laughing at his own pain. And boy did it hurt. But he laughed at himself because the person who could hurt him the most was still himself. He was such a jerk.

"Okay...You're creeping me out as always. I have no idea what's going on." Giroro told him. "I'm going to...go find Dororo. He'll help me with the Keroro and Mois thing more."

Kululu continued laughing because he knew now what was going on. _I have the information. Now I can be on top of the situation._

But how did he fix things? _Tricking her into dating me like last time won't work. That was the wrong way to do things._

He had to fix things before Mois realized Keroro liked her.

* * *

Unfortunately Kululu was so busy planning that Giroro had time to drag Mois to Keroro's room.

"I do things in a direct way, and this is the best thing I can do here." He told her.

"Huh? I was kinda doing something so I can't talk to Uncle right now-" Mois tried to defend.

Dororo dropped down from the ceiling. "You are right, Giroro, nothing can happen until they communicate." He helped Giroro push Mois into Keroro's room. "Ninja arte, seal!" He sealed the door shut. "It will release when you communicate about your mutual feelings!"

"Dororo? Giroro?" Keroro finally snapped out of his stupor of what Dororo had told him. "What's happening?"

"You two will talk about how you feel. And then you will be released." Dororo told him.

Mois glanced at Keroro a little worriedly.

"Uhhh…." Keroro frowned. He didn't know how to start this.

* * *

Keroro was extremely flustered in his room alone with Mois. He kept trying to start the conversation, "I'm sorry." He would say, and Mois would just look at him confused.

He kept trying to apologize for everything, the Kululu situation and everything else. _Maybe she does like me. Dororo did say that._ He was wondering if he had been stupid this entire time. She didn't seem that into Kululu right now.

But Keroro didn't know how to start the conversation. He didn't know how to talk to Mois about their feelings.

"Does Dororo think we like each other?" Mois asked.

"Yeah." Keroro nodded. "Umm...What's with people thinking that you like someone? I mean I was pretty stuck to the Kululu theory and now a weird theory has appeared about you liking me?" He was still unsure if that was true.

Dororo had said so much weird stuff.

Mois frowned. "If...If you want to talk about your theory about me and Kululu I don't want to communicate and we can stay locked in the room."

Keroro squeaked. "I'm sorry. I didn't...Mean to hurt you with a theory. I just...I thought you'd be a good couple. You seemed to like him more than normal people did. And he seemed to listen to you more than he listened to normal people. And you were always laughing together on the sidelines. I...I guess I read into things too much."

Mois smiled at Keroro's apology. "It's all right. And usually I wouldn't be so bothered by you making up weird ideas. I mean you are Uncle. I'm...I'm just going through a hard time right now."

"Oh?" Keroro sat next to her. "It's all right. I'm sure whatever happened wasn't your fault. And it's okay to be sad sometimes!" He tried to comfort. "I mean I get sad over a gundam breaking. So whatever happened must be less petty than that.

Mois leaned next to him. She knew they were in a room locked together, but sometimes it really helped to talk to Keroro. "Thanks Uncle." He really knew what to say sometimes, even if he didn't know the situation.

That was one of the things comforting about Keroro. And right now even if they were locked in a room together, she could feel this weird feeling of comfort from Keroro. Perhaps it was because she wasn't as dedicated to being in love with him anymore but it felt nice just getting the normal comfort that she wanted.

 _I guess...We're bonding more like normal people?_ That made Angol Mois smile despite how bummed out she was. It was a creature comfort.

It also made her smile a bit because of what he said about her and Kululu. "Sometimes I wondered too about us." She finally decided to talk. "I think that's why your prodding worked so much on me. Does that mean I'm stupid and gullible, Uncle? Tamama says I am."

"You aren't. I don't think it's gullible to get your hopes up or think there's more to something when there's not." Keroro reached up and pat Angol Mois's head.

He then pulled his hand away, remembering what Dororo said and what he wanted them to talk about. He looked frightened.

"Uncle?" Angol Mois asked worriedly.

"I like this. I like talking to you." Keroro admitted. "Dororo...Says there's more to our relationship than I think there is. He said things like...Uhh that you're in love with me. And that we need to talk about our feelings." He neglected to mention that Dororo thought Keroro liked him. "That's stupid, right? I mean you would never like me."

"It's not stupid." Mois told him.

Keroro scooted away. _Oh no. He was right. Then...I'm going to have to reject her? Now…? Or later?_ He was really bad at rejecting girls. They never knew what he was trying to say. He was kinda afraid he wouldn't be direct enough and they'd start dating.

"I used to have a crush on you." Mois admitted.

"W-what?" Keroro asked. But she was like his niece. He tried to shove that weirdness down and focus on the rest of her statement. "Used to?"

"Yeah. Used to. I guess...I was focusing on other things. And when my mind became clearer things became clearer to me. That I might have been using you to feel safe and like I had feelings of love towards someone. Or that I wanted our relationship to have parts of it that it didn't previously have, like your attention and I thought the only way to get that was through romance, not just looking for familial attention." Mois explained, "But...When I started thinking about real romantic things, you weren't really in them. And I guess I just grew out of it and you could say, my eyes are clearer?"

"Aww..." Keroro smiled. She no longer liked him! That was peachy with him. He pat her head again.

"Also, like...Aren't you gay? I guess I didn't notice that when I was in love with you. Oops!" Mois smiled comically.

Keroro's jaw dropped open. "I'm not—Umm..I mean why would you think a thing like that?" He blushed. "I definitely am not." Yeah he could feel the denial. It was part of the reason Dororo's logic that he was in love with Mois shocked him so much.

"Uhh...so we good then? We're still cool but like….not romantically? Ever?" Keroro asked.

"Yep!" Angol Mois nodded.

And because they had come to a mutual understanding the door unlocked. Mois decided to stay there and sit by him though.

It was nice to sometimes just hang out with Keroro.

* * *

Kululu was in his lab trying to write more plans. He didn't have to figure out how to fix things now. He just had to come up with an over-the-top plan to confess to Mois.

 _The problem with our relationship is she wanted my feelings. So I'll give them to her._ He decided. He just had to think more like Giroro as he plotted the whole thing.

It was hard to think like Giroro and be over the top. Things like flowers didn't come to his mind or ways to be romantic. But he knew he had to be over-the-top about it to ensure Mois would take him back.

 _I need to think of this in more of a...Me and Mois way._ They were different. And eventually he came upon a plan. The quickest way to Mois's heart wasn't the way of a hero, it was the way of a villain. He had to gift wrap a planet, or a replica of this planet to give to her.

 _This would be easy._ He decided. He had done it before by gathering all of the pekoponians trash to make a replica.

She would love it.

* * *

Kululu pointed to the sky that day. "Oh no! A large giant thing that looks like this planet is trying to swallow this planet." He pointed to his trash replica.

Natsumi and everybody looked up as the sky darkened. "You have got to be kidding me. What kind of alien scum would send another planet to collide with ours?"

"Ku, ku, ku. I wonder who would do something like that." Kululu shrugged sarcastically. "Oh well. Guess we better send the planet destroyer to destroy it. You want to take a crack at it, Mois? Get it, crack?"

Mois stared at him as the sky started to darken and the screams of Natsumi's neighbors filled the air, sirens to evacuate blared loudly. "Did you make this to bribe me, Kululu?" She realized.

"Don't be silly, Mois. Not even Kululu would do something so evil to create another planet to collide with ours." Natsumi told her.

"Maybe~." Kululu admitted. "Would you be into that?"

"You've gotta be kidding me." Giroro face palmed. "You had 1000 different options on how to do this normally. I told you what the problem was that you don't have feelings and she's normal and you decided to create another planet to collide with ours? That was your solution?"

"Do you like it?" Kululu asked.

"I'm not going to be bribed." Angol Mois crossed her arms, trying to glare. Her glare kept breaking though to smile and glee. Another planet! All for her to destroy!

 _It's working!_ He knew Mois couldn't contain her excitement. _There's another truth that Giroro neglected to say in his speech that woke me up. Mois might be a normal girl when it comes to wanting feelings but she is in now way a normal girl._

"Mois! It's getting closer!" Keroro screamed, "Can...Can you destroy it?"

"I don't know." Mois paused. "I guess if you guys beg me to I will." She tried to pretend she was disinterested.

 _We're all going to be crushed in moments and she's using this opportunity to get us to beg her to destroy the fricken planet when we've told her for years not to destroy things. That's such a jerk move!_ Kululu realized. _I love her._

"Mois please! You've gotta destroy the planet! I thought I was your buddy. We talked a lot." Keroro told her.

"But Kululu made this, right? And I heard all of you tell me not to give into his jerk schemes. So isn't destroying this exactly what he wants?" Mois pointed out. "I guess I can't destroy the planet then."

"Mois! Now is not the time to think about not giving Kululu what he wants!" Natsumi told her. "But..God you really did make that monster?" She asked Kululu. "What could possess you to do that?'

"Eh if you idiots could go try to seduce other idiots for years unsuccessfully I could try the same thing in my own way. And because I'm smarter than all of you I could do it a little better." Kululu mocked. "...Hopefully. It's working, right? I've got another planet suggestions if that doesn't work. And maps of fault lines." He glanced at Mois.

"God, I've never hated you more." Mois admitted. "You're so good at this. I want to be mad at you or something like that, but...how can I be angry at someone who offers me defenseless planets?" Mois moaned. She had been so hurt! And now she was so angry at him! But now suddenly Kululu was all interested in seducing her and doing it so well!

 _Why am I so weak about this stuff?_ Mois asked herself. She didn't know, but it was melting her heart. _I wanted communication! I wanted him to say he does like me. But now I'm cracking as easily as a planet._

"Mois! Hurry up! The screams are getting louder!" Giroro yelled. Everyone kept begging her to destroy the planet.

"Fine." Mois agreed. "Don't think this means I'm accepting the bribe though, Kululu!" She tried to be tough. "I'm still hurt. I'm not...going to be tricked again into some casual thing that I have no idea what it is."

"Listen I have no idea what's going on, but Giroro really is, right. Maybe you guys should finish your fight later? The planet is getting closer and closer and like...What if people are actually dying from Kululu's bribey prank? Huh? Thought about that?" Keroro asked

"Oh god, people could be dying from this." Mois realized. "Like the other side of the world could be shaking from an earthquake from the slow oncoming collision. The tides could be all out of whack! This could be a huge natural disaster." She swooned, little hearts in her eyes.

Her words were right but Keroro was really worried that her tone was not.

"I know." Kululu responded. "I liked the casual thing. I did. But you're right that doesn't work long term without communication. You were right. I was wrong. You win." Kululu continued their little fight.

"Guys? Guys?" Giroro told them. "Mois really should be going."

"Yeah...You can do your weird argument later? Please? But there's a giant planet in the sky!" Natsumi yelled.

"You are so lucky that planet is there and I'm willing to talk." Mois did not listen to Natsumi.

"I'm sorry about writing no." Kululu apologized. "I was...I was just really afraid you'd write no too."

"I know." Mois told him looking at him sweetly. She knew deep down that Kululu just feared rejection and was afraid. But it didn't mean his actions didn't have consequences and didn't hurt her.

"Mois!" Natsumi tugged at her arm

"You probably should go and destroy that thing now. I'm sure that will be fun." Kululu decided and pointed up. "Ku, ku, ku. I'll stay here getting beat up for making that probably."

Mois sighed cuz she liked talking. "Okay…!" She said with glee. "...There's nothing else you want...to tell me though? Communicate to me? I mean..Unfortunately for me your stupid bribe is working a little bit. It's just so cool. But it doesn't solve the issue, Kululu!" She transformed into her angolian form with her lucifer spear.

"Finally!" Natsumi groaned.

"Nope! Bye!" Kululu told her, gesturing for her to lean down so he could say something else. "I love you!" He told her when she was closer giving her a quick kiss on the forehead. "Do great!" He said a little louder so she could know that she really did need to go now.

She blushed and touched her forehead.

"D-did...Did you see that? He kissed her!" Keroro pointed to Giroro and Dororo. "So maybe I was right after all!"

"I thought you two came to an understanding and were together now." Dororo frowned. "Did my arte not work properly?"

"Now's not the time Keroro!" Giroro told him. "I don't care if he kissed her if it gets her to destroy that thing it's fine!" He was a little more invested in reality and the fact that that thing was looming.

Mois flew up giving a quick smile before she went. She shot up like a rocket to that thing and disappeared obviously landing on the fake planet.

In a moment it burst open and mud rained down. But it didn't collide and the sky was no longer dark.

People cheered. The sirens stopped. The thing was gone!

"...Did you really try to win her back through destroying all of us?" Giroro asked Kululu one time before Kululu sneaked off so that Natsumi wouldn't destroy us.

"I thought you knew how I worked Giroro." Kululu shrugged. "If I'm miserable I make everybody more miserable. Ku, ku, ku. What can I say I'm a jerk?"

Giroro threw a grenade at him. "You're a terrible."

"It just happens that destroying people was the true way to invest myself in Mois's life again. It's something Keroro could never do. On purpose that is." Kululu mocked.

It wasn't really the destroying people that would fully win her over. It was probably the long talk they were most likely going to have.

But it had made her happy and them on better terms and that was exactly what Kululu needed. He fled the scene.

* * *

"Do...Do you really love me?" Mois asked later, when she had returned to the planet. She had entered Kululu's lab so they could talk alone.

"Y-yeah." Kululu had a little trouble answering, stuttering a bit. _I have to get better about saying it. It...It can't be scary. Or else we'll never work._ "I love you, Mois."

Mois's expression burst into a smile. But she seemed to still try to pretend that she was a little mad. "Why didn't you tell me earlier then? Like when we were together and I was looking for that information?"

"I don't know. I was scared and stupid." He shrugged. "This whole...Normal feelings things is a little hard for me. I told you I had a problem with compassion, sympathizing and empathy with people." He reminded.

Mois tried not to forgive him instantly despite still coming off the thrill of destroying a planet. "How do I know you're telling the truth? You could be pretending to...I don't know observe me or something." She decided.

Kululu grabbed Mois's hand and pulled her closer to him. "I'm not. But I suppose you don't. You're going to have to believe me." He paused. "We...We don't have to date again. But...I want you to know I'll wait for you as long as it takes for you to want to date me again."

"Kululu." Mois frowned. "I was really mad at you and hurt that you didn't want to communicate with me honestly. But...I'm a sucker."

"Ku, ku, ku. The planet made you forget about all that, didn't it?" Kululu grinned.

"Y-yeah! But that doesn't mean I'm like 100% forgiving." Mois lied. "I want you to commit to actually communicating if we start a relationship again. You have to try not to weasel out of talking."

Kululu didn't like that. But he sighed. That was fair. And it was the only way they would work out. _Communication shouldn't be something to fear. It should keep a relationship together._ "Okay." He agreed.

Mois smiled and clapped. She had everything she wanted now! She had destroyed something that looked like Pekopon that day and Kululu and her were dating and he was in love with her. She stared at him for a moment.

Kululu shivered. "So...Um...Are….Will you be my girlfriend…? Or is it too late? Are you and Keroro together?"

Mois giggled. "We're not. And yes, I'll date you." She smiled.

Kululu looked a little relieved.

"Now, I'm coming off of a planet cracking high, so do you want to make out or something?" She offered.

"God yes." Kululu nodded quickly. Was getting her to kiss him really that easy?

As she wrapped her arms around him and started kissing him with a passion that was surprising, he realized the answer was yes.

And he kissed his girlfriend back.

* * *

When Kululu and Angol Mois entered the invasion together they were holding hands.

Dororo looked surprised. "You're...You're not going to say anything?" He glanced at Keroro. He knew something had failed and they weren't together.

"I told Mois I wouldn't make insane theories or something." Keroro sighed. "But..." he really wanted proof. He wanted Giroro and Dororo to know he wasn't a total idiot. "Hey, um...What's up with that?" He pointed to their hands.

"Eh. I wanted to hold hands." Kululu said casually.

"Are you dating or something?" Keroro joked, not being able to help himself.

"Yeah. Obviously." Kululu responded.

Keroro, Dororo and Giroro gasped. Keroro jumped up and down. "Guys! I was right! I told you!"

"….I guess I...Uhh underestimated Angol Mois." Giroro sighed. "I thought she just...Would never like him." Apparently he hadn't taken into account how twisted and weird she was too.

"I was more observant than you guys! I'm not oblivious! I was the only right one! They really did like each other!" Keroro bragged. "Hehehe! I'm right all the time! I told you your relationship chart was wrong. Nobody is in love with me here!" He bragged.

"Tamama is." Giroro pointed out.

Keroro's eyes widened. "WHAT-?"

"You broke him." Tamama told Giroro.

"Now he'll probably think you're in love with someone else too." Dororo told Giroro.

Giroro rolled his eyes. He hoped this whole thing didn't start over with Tamama. That would be an annoyance.

Angol Mois and Kululu just glanced at each other. At least Keroro wouldn't bother them anymore.

But they were fine with what they were. They didn't really care if the rest of the platoon knew they were happy.

* * *

 **Notes: Keroro's gay in every story I write pretty much.  
I think I struggle with conclusions and getting romantic relationships together the most. I always hope practice fixes that, but idk... How do you get people together? How do you conclude things. It's hard. Someday I'll figure it out.**

 **Anyway please review**


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